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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

DH used my wrapping paper

141 replies

YippeeKayakOtherBuckets · 14/12/2020 20:37

And it’s tipped me over the fucking edge. I’m aware of how ridiculous that sounds.

DH buys and wraps the presents for his brothers and I do mine plus his SILs’ and MIL’s. Just the way it’s always been. I enjoy wrapping and am a bit of a ponce about it.

This year I had gorgeous, thick, expensive printed brown paper from Paperchase, contrasting tags and a selection of ribbon. I’ve done all of his gifts, the kids and most of my families but I’m still waiting for a couple of parcels.

While I was at work yesterday he wrapped his stuff. We’d had a conversation earlier in the week about there being tons of leftover wrap from previous years in the garage. I got back from work in the small hours.

Came down this morning to a pile of beautifully wrapped gifts for his brothers in MY paper. Leaving me with half a scrap.

He was SO pleased with himself for wrapping stuff before the eleventh hour (we are famously disorganised) and crowed about the prettiness of the paper. I picked up the remaining scrap and burst into tears. I now have the choice of ordering more (it took a week last time) or having to give family groups mismatched wrapping. Yes I can hear myself.

I think that this Christmas has been so weird already and we’ve missed out on so much that this was the straw that broke me. I can’t even look at him.

Please tell me about your ridiculous Christmas tantrums this year to make me feel better. I’m ok with not seeing family, I’m ok with no Father Christmas visits or illuminations or markets. I’m fucking fucked off that my wrapping paper has been used up.

OP posts:

Spaghettibetty345 · 14/12/2020 22:11

I would hate it if someone you’d my nice paper. I only used my nice paper on selected people haha. The rest get cheaper ones. Paper chase wrapping paper is very good quality and not cheap!

Shodan · 14/12/2020 22:11

I can remember XH using the wrapping paper that I had specifically for wrapping stocking fillers (because Father Christmas OBVIOUSLY wouldn't use the same paper!) to wrap some gifts for his family.

We'd already had a row slight disagreement about the fact that I hadn't done it for him so I dug my heels in and insisted he unwrap them and rewrap with different paper. I reminded him that I'd told him TWICE not to use that paper and if he'd JUST LISTENED instead of ignoring me it wouldn't have come to this.

I was really very cross

fruitandbarley · 14/12/2020 22:15

Buy him some lining paper and felt tips and tell him hes got to make you a replacement roll.

WeBuiltThisBuffetOnSausageRoll · 14/12/2020 22:20

Why were you buying any new wrapping paper at all, if you've got loads left from last year? Were you planning to leave it festering unused forever or for it to be used up eventually for his side of the family? Wrapping paper is literally a waste product in the making. Most councils don't even accept it for recycling.

Also, I was a bit confused by this:
I do mine plus his SILs’ and MIL’s.

Is his MIL not your own Mum; and (some of) his SILs possibly your own Sister(s)? Or did you mean your MIL and SILs?

AdoraBell · 14/12/2020 22:20

Kill him, then send him out to replace the wrapping paper, whip him to wrap your presents when he gets back from the shops, then mutilate him and kick him out into the garden/street.

Then pour yourself a large gin and put your feet up.

It’s the only way.

Avondklok · 14/12/2020 22:21

I bought 5 rolls. 2 were red, one with dots and one with stars. The others are gold in various patterns. I told dh that his for his presents I would use red with stars, I would have dots, and the gold was for dd who had more presents. Guess which one he used? 😂😡

fassbendersmistress · 14/12/2020 22:22

@Yeahnahmum

Nobody but you would be upset about this whole situation. I for one find wrapping so unnecessary anyway. I am not a kid and i dont care about the whole "unveiling" moment. I just want my present (if I'm getting one 😂)

And stop talking about a damn hierarchy! !!! Your parents are not more important than his brothers/sisters

Plus... your CRIED over Christmas paper... really? I want to cry not being able to spend my Christmas with any of my family as we have been separated for over 1.5 years now. (First by distance then covid )but here i am trying to keep it together. And you cry. Over brown paper with penguins on it...

Calm down and read the room

Whydoiwearsomuchleopardprint · 14/12/2020 22:27

And this is why I don’t like Christmas much, for some strange reason we all start behaving weirdly. It’s about giving, who cares about your perfect paper chase wrapping!

TheWichitaWineOne · 14/12/2020 22:29

I called him a ponce. And now I'm calling you one. Ponce!

Exactly what I heard in my head when I saw that word.

TheChosenTwo · 14/12/2020 22:34

I do all the shopping and wrapping here for both our rather large families. I also appreciate nice wrapping paper (there’s a whole other thread somewhere about wrapping paper which got quite heated ). Dh buys and wraps my things. That’s it.
He’s not getting his mitts on my beautiful paper to wrap my presents as he’ll butcher it, waste loads and still manage to make it look shit.
So no. He can use the cheap Costco rubbish which is for stockings and people I don’t like very much
Yanbu, there totally is a hierarchy or wrapping paper and he should have known better 😂

Sparklfairy · 14/12/2020 22:34

@SuperCaliFragalistic

I know this is supposed to be lighthearted but you "burst into tears" over some wrapping paper? You sound very highly strung, is there something else going on? Why isn't he allowed to use the "good" stuff anyway?

I dunno, maybe a pandemic and the realisation it's going to be a Christmas like no other?

Nottherealslimshady · 14/12/2020 22:37

I use set wrapping paper, DH, dog and family all have different. I would be annoyed if DH used it and I needed it.
When he starts wrapping I tell him what I'm using papers for and what he cant use but where the spare stuff is. He usually buys his own anyway as he does the same thing as me.

Your husband needs to replace your paper.

SoftSheen · 14/12/2020 22:37

I understand how you feel, but you still have time to order more.

Then hide it in a box deep under the bed like I do.

Canwecancel2020 · 14/12/2020 22:47

I wish I was witty and could offer any comfort, but your post did make me chuckle so thank you :)

(after I just wrapped all my parcels to post and now can’t find my address book... my going to the post office without queuing with a toddler window is tomorrow)

Also realised I still need presents for two teachers, nursery and key worker, childminder and my boss, and Santa’s special paper.... in a small town only populated with cheap shops and an Iceland.

But it really is first world problems, and such a weird year, so I get where you’re coming from

OuiOuiMonAmi · 14/12/2020 22:54

@Yeahnahmum

And stop talking about a damn hierarchy! !!! Your parents are not more important than his brothers/sisters

The thing is, she's obvs not crying about the wrapping paper. She's crying about DH not thinking, the prospect of something enjoyable being taken away, the hassle of having to order more etc. Surely that's obvious? And OP knows she's BU - she said so.

Also, it's unreasonable to say that someone shouldn't be upset because their problem is trivial compared to another. Yes, OP's situ is far more trivial than yours - but yours will also be trivial compared to someone else's.

WitchesBritchesPumpkinPants · 14/12/2020 22:56

@Yeahnahmum

And stop talking about a damn hierarchy! !!! Your parents are not more important than his brothers/sisters

Do you have your bed pushed against the wall???

Maybe push it against the other wall so you aren't constantly getting out of the wrong side of it!!

FoxtrotOscarPoppet · 14/12/2020 23:01

Not read the full thread but YANBU.

My husband does this Every. Bloody. Year.
He never makes the effort to go out and buy it. His family’s presents always end up beautifully gift wrapped with MY wrapping paper and I end up with mismatched wrapping paper / ribbons / tags.

I’m a slow learner but this year I have hidden the beautiful wrapping paper I’ve bought. We have lots left over from last year which he can get on and use and I’ll do my wrapping when he’s at work.

Ltdannygreen · 14/12/2020 23:01

If it makes you feel better DP uses my wrapping paper to wrap presents for me 😩

mrshonda · 14/12/2020 23:03

I asked ExH what he'd like for Christmas, and he gave me a shortlist which included the new book by a favourite author. This was in October. I asked him not to buy any of the things on the shortlist. Got the book, including having it signed by the author, and wrapped it beautifully. I was so pleased, imagining his face when he unwrapped it. A week before Christmas, he waltzed in carrying a copy of that book which he'd just bought. I was so angry, upset and disappointed, I threw the wrapped one at his head. Luckily for him, he ducked - it was a hardback and the size of a door stop.

VetiverAndLavender · 14/12/2020 23:05

I never knew until MN that people care about matching paper across a whole group of gifts for different people. I actually intentionally mix up the papers so that there's a variety. I like it that way, unless there are two or three boxes going to one person and I plan to stack them and tie them all together with ribbon.

Sorry about your disappointment, though, OP!

toastfiend · 14/12/2020 23:08

Mine wasn't this year, mine was last year. We were hosting, and it was DS' first Christmas and I just wanted everything to be perfect. DH forgot to water the tree and it went dry so we had to take another inch off the stump because I was so worried it would go all dry and limp before Christmas Day. This was enough of a pain because it was fully decorated, but, and I have no idea why, rather than taking an inch off the stump, DH took about about 4 inches and we were left with this weird, squat, bottom heavy tree, branches practically resting on the carpet. It had looked perfect before and I was so upset, and so cross. I made him go and buy a new tree. It was totally unreasonable and I look back and cringe now, but I think it was a combination of pressure of hosting (lovely) family who had set the bar very high in previous years, and the remnants of post-natal depression and anxiety. Anyway, I was probably a bit like a toddler who wants you to put their broken biscuit back together exactly as it had been and no other would do, but I remember it really, really mattered to me at the time and it felt like the worst thing ever. We ended up with a vast behemoth of a tree as that was all that was left by that point, taking up the entire living room like a big, flashing reminder for the rest of Christmas. 🤦‍♀️

It might be a bit petty, but you're allowed to be cross. This year has been tough and sometimes it's just a 'straw that broke the camel's back' type of situation.

KarlKennedysDurianFruit · 14/12/2020 23:09

DH used to happily buy his own wrapping paper and I'd get ugly presents, in shiny glittery paper that is still be finding a week later, while he tore open beautifully wrapped works of art without even noticing!! Now I buy all of the wrapping paper from the joint account and get to look at lots of pretty co-ordinated presents under the tree (for five minutes until DS tries to ravage them or the cat rips a lovingly tied bow off...). I have found my people.

OllysArmy · 14/12/2020 23:10

We have upgraded our wrapping paper over the years as I now buy from John Lewis or similar after Christmas and keep it for the next year. Plus Santa doesn’t visit us now that D.C. are adults so no need for his paper.

We did try a different pattern for each person but then DH got confused so we do labels too.

Having experienced many Christmases with my family and DH family there is no way I am going fancy as it would never be appreciated. And DH can share what we have but I do usually direct him to the paper I would like my gifts wrapped in.

MIL always refused to label presents and I have sat through many hours of her trying to remember who a particular present was for, only for FIL to realise it is something he had wrapped and it was for her.

Enough4me · 14/12/2020 23:14

Disgraceful, I hope the centre had a solid cardboard tube you can hit him with.

My partner mistakingly wrapped a soft sack for my youngest DCs gifts. I was not impressed, almost LTB.

NOT SERIOUS

Itsnotagazebo · 14/12/2020 23:15

YaNbu. Why is it hard for them to remember the wrapping paper rules?

In our house it's the same every year... One set of paper for stocking gifts, this can double up for wrapping the main present(s) from Santa., wrapping paper for all other gifts Inc family and friends. Different paper for my very young nieces - fun cheery paper for them.

All paper has to have the grid squares on the back.

Selecting a wrapping theme is crucial cos wrapping is a bore otherwise and a collection of ribbon essential.

Oh I feel your pain. Hope you can rescue Christmas.

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