To ask what's the rudest thing a stranger has done to you?

[YoungScrappyHungry]

Inspired by the lovely thread about kindest thing strangers have done for you, and also a chance for me to share this horror.

When I was 19, I worked on the tills at a supermarket in my holidays from university.

A woman I was serving was staring at me, trying to get my attention as I scanned her stuff. I looked up at her and smiled. She said, in still the most condescending tone I've ever heard:

'Don't you wish you'd studied now?'

I was so floored and ashamed, I didn't say a thing back and just carried on scanning her things. Fact was I was actually at university, but even if I hadn't been....aghh!....still gets me.

What are yours?

I went into a well known high street store renowned for its underware selection....lets call it Em & Tess. I had just had a baby. My body didnt feel like mine anymore and my hormones were all over the place. I was following advice about getting a new bra fitted post baby. I asked the fitter to measure me ( i have zero bust but was kind of just following advice). She came into the changing room. Measured me. Sniggered. And then said ...oh im sorry i dont know if we do your back measurement in that small a cup. I was mortified. I got dressed as quickly as possible and flew out of the shop holding back tears. Obviously she was being truthful, but the way she said it and because i was overly sensitive due to hormones...ive never forgotten how humiliated i felt.

When I was pregnant with my DD I was walking through a shopping centre on my way to work, I was VERY visibly pregnant and it was summer so I didn’t have lots of layers or anything that would hide my bump, a woman came storming through the centre with massive shopping bags and barges into me, whacking me in the stomach with her bags and leaving me completely stunned and petrified for my baby. She didn’t even say sorry or turn back to see if I was okay, when I’d turned around to say something she had disappeared from view. I carried onto work in tears and they sent me to hospital to get checked over. Luckily my baby was okay. I’ll never forget that awful day.

Some of these are awful. For all the pop's who were too embarrassed / shocked / upset to say anything, I hope these rude guys say something to somebody who will absolutely go through them.

As always a bit at all the "I look soooo young I get mistaken for my kids sibling / au pair" etc. Hhhm, yes, not quite the same is it. But yaaaay for you looking so young

Pp's (not pops)
Rude gits (not guys)

At checkout in Asda my then 2 yr old daughter was chattering away. I said to the checkout assistant that she was my little surprise as there’s 9 years between her and my next youngest. She looked at us and said “oh my god why didn’t you abort?” I’ve never been so gobsmacked in my entire life!

Some of these are so funny and odd, and some are so hurtful. Others are plain vile. Why don't people THINK!?
Mine is one that came to me while I was reading this.

I was in a pantomime, and was playing one of the three musketeers. Lady De Winter was the "villain" and we had a scene where we were doing some hero /villain banter, only the script was a bit lame so we had a go at improvising some lines. They were all fairly standard barbs at silly things the characters had done.
At the time I was about a size 18, and notably larger than the actor playing De Winter.

We were all having a bit of a laugh and some of the lines we were coming out with were genuinely quite funny and clever, and then from out of nowhere, she just said "well, you're fat so you don't get an opinion"

There was nothing in the script that pointed to the character having "fat" as a trope and was nothing whatsoever to do with any of the other lines. It was me as an actor who was fat, so throwing that line at me was just insulting.

I did stop the scene and say "I would prefer it if we don't make personal remarks that don't impact the story. Thanks" but I wish I'd told her how hurt I was.

I know it's acting and actually, I have on several occasions been absolutely fine with the body that I'm presenting becoming part of the character and therefore referred to. I've played "fat characters" which have been part of the story. But it was so out of context here and so unnecessary that it really stung.

Been grabbed at and groped numerous times while out with friends, which I sadly accepted at the time was just something you had to out up with as a woman.
More recently, when I was pregnant with my dd, the cashier at aldi asked me when I was due, and added, you look like you're about to drop, you're huge! she looked quite embarrassed when I told her I still had 10 weeks to go, I was just massive.
And also in the last few weeks, I'm heavily pregnant with a ds, and Im due just before Christmas day so I wanted to get a Xmas outfit in case he decides to make his apprentice on time. the lady at the checkout said oh what an awful outfit, I feel sorry for your kid already if you're going to dress him like that! I just said well its lucky its not your baby then isn't it love.
Why people think they can say what they like to you when you're pregnant just baffles me

@Eggnoggoanngoanngoann

I went into a well known high street store renowned for its underware selection....lets call it Em & Tess. I had just had a baby. My body didnt feel like mine anymore and my hormones were all over the place. I was following advice about getting a new bra fitted post baby. I asked the fitter to measure me ( i have zero bust but was kind of just following advice). She came into the changing room. Measured me. Sniggered. And then said ...oh im sorry i dont know if we do your back measurement in that small a cup. I was mortified. I got dressed as quickly as possible and flew out of the shop holding back tears. Obviously she was being truthful, but the way she said it and because i was overly sensitive due to hormones...ive never forgotten how humiliated i felt.

That reminds me of a similar situation but sort of opposite. As a slim 18 year old with a big bust I saved my money and went to a fancy lingerie shop to try to get a new bra. I knew my options were limited but it was a big shop. The lady insisted that I needed a proper fitting and got her tape measure out. She then disappeared and came back with three colleagues and said to them 'I wanted to show you this, you'll not come across this very often'. Then she turned to me and tutted, as if I had deliberately developed an inconvenient body shape, and said 'for goodness sake, you've got to understand that there's very little available in a size like that'.

I was already so horribly self conscious. I was almost a recluse after that, I remember coming home to my housemates and closing myself in my room and crying for about 48 hours. My friends were begging me to tell them what had happened and I was so embarrassed I couldn't even tell them.

I have lots from working in retail and customer services, however this one stands out as she's the only one to make me cry.

We used a third party to provide a service, unfortunately they hadn't arrived when they were meant to as their vehicle had broken down. Normally they'd arrange for someone else to come out, but covid meant they were operating on skeleton staff and they had no one else available. I explained this and advised I was reaching out to another company to see if they could help, but they were also short staffed and usually needed a weeks notice, so I probably wouldn't be able to make it happen that day. For context it wasn't something time critical, though it was obviously inconvenient. She wouldn't accept that I couldn't get anyone to her that day, she was screaming and sitting at me and told me that she hoped my family got ill with covid and died. This was a nurse too!

At least there was a happy ending for me, I had an internal job interview the next day and was able to use the fact I stayed calm and polite in the face of her abuse to help win me the job, especially as they were able to listen to the call themselves. So thanks horrible lady, I've got a great job now!

"what's wrong with her teeth has she already had a tooth out" whilst tutting.. an Indian woman said to my 2 year old daughter who had lip tie which had caused a significant gap in her 2 front teeth.

My azt smear test was awful. The nurse doing it was very nervous and poked around for ages unable to get a sample, instructing me to do various contortions and relax more as she poked and oridded about. Then she got another nurse in who was no help but offered the observation that "women of that age, when they're gettig older, they dry up down there". The first nurse joined in, saying "yes, it's because you've closed up because you're older now, but we'll keep trying to get something".

I was 47, and a particularly young looking 47 with a very healthy sex life! The nurses both looked my age.

Thankfully after about 25 minutes of this, they called in another nurse who managed it straight away with no fuss.

But the whole exierience as so painful and off putting, I know I'm going to have problems going next time. As I left, I got the impression they expected me to make a complaint but I just wanted out of there.

I was on a work course in central London years ago. Went outside at lunchtime to stretch my legs. Walked down the road and I felt a tap on my shoulder. Young woman (20ish) spat in my face as I turned and then legged it. No idea who she was or why she'd done it. Another woman passing saw what had happened and told me not to worry it was just a nutter!

@GrinchnotHinch

When I was ringing round schools for DS one headteacher said “does he have a dad?”

Given this was over the phone I very much doubt it was a judgement on you. I imagine that she has forms to fill in and given it's not exactly uncommon for a child's father to be not on the birth certificate and no involvement in the child's life, then the question is asked whether there is a father rather than assuming there is and asking his name . I'm not sure of the most tactful way of handling this really .......

I was on crutches after tearing a ligament. Was waiting for the train at the tube station and when one arrived a woman shoved me aside to get on. Cow.

I need to know what this book is now!!

@netstaller

With DS1 on a busy bus stuck in traffic. He started to cry as it was hot and he wanted to get out of the pram, but i couldn't get him out as the bus was really busy and people were crammed in like sardines - I was standing behind his pram and could barely move . An old man starts shouting at me to shut him up! Told me I was a bad mother for not controlling him.

I said loudly he's a baby I can't do anything. The old man started shouting at me when some other lady shouted at him to shut up and even the teenagers standing nearby said "he's a baby fam, babies cry!" The whole of the bottom of the bus gave him the evil eye and I was so relieved my heart could have burst!

That reminds me of something that happened to me when my DD1 was just a few months old.

We lived in London at the time and it was on the Docklands Light Railway. I had picked her up from nursery after my day at work and we were heading home. DD was in the pram.

We got off the train at our station and were about to get in the lift. DD was tired and began crying. A woman who was standing next to us also waiting for the lift shouted "No! I don't want to get in the lift with a crying baby!".

I'm pleased that I actually managed to reply to hi. I just simply said "Well don't get into the lift then!" and then got into it with still grizzling DD in the pram. So did the idiot woman who remained silent after that and had a face like thunder.

People seem to think you can just switch babies off. Sometimes when they are tired of hungry and overwhelmed nothing works, and we were just two minutes from home by that point.

*reply to her.

My DD(maybe 3/4 at the time) was in Ikea and playing in the tiny kids area they have and another little boy came to play. My DD went up and asked the boy if he wanted to play, he ignored her, she asked again, he ran and hid behind his Mum, so she followed him and asked if he wanted to play. I then got DD's attention and told her he doesn't want to play, and she happily played on her own. Cue the mother of the boy, grabbing him by the hand and whispering, "I don't know why she was like that, I think she's Autistic," as if it was a bad word.

My DH and I were so pissed off at that lady.

@LovelyIssues what does the fact that she was Indian have to do with anything?

@Misskittyfantastico85
You've reminded me I had exactly this. I was 22 and we were looking for our first house. I worked in a cafe over the road and went in to book some viewings still in my uniform.
The estate agent said something along the lines of "how much deposit do you have because the sellers won't take any offers you know"
I am definitely not a push over so told her very politely that we "have enough thank you" and walked out without booking the viewings. I wish that I'd taken it further as they had potentially lost a sale there.
Bought out house the next day with another agent 😆

I am a wedding photographer and get quite often about being a "hobby" etc mainly from male guests. If I ever have someone working for me (male) they always assume I'm working for them and they often ask if my husband will be doing a certain shot etc. I usually reply "oh I didn't realise my husband was here..." 🤦🏼‍♀️

@Namechanged2124 that's awful. "This is my country, although people like you sometimes make me ashamed of it?"

When me and DB were very young and our DM had taken us to visit our aunt. Parents were recently divorced and DM had been through hell looking back.

We were exited as hell on the way home after being spoiled by our lovely aunt.

Waiting at the bus stop to make the journey to the train station we were very giddy and animated.

A woman said to our DM 'can't you keep your kids under control'

Quick as a flash DM replied 'can't you keep your mouth under control'

Others waiting for the bus giggled and one lady clapped her hands.

I was about 6 and DB 4. That was the day I realised my DM is pretty cool.

Having someone shout at me across a park to "tuck my legs in" - I was 14 and already very self conscious about my large calves, apparently with good reason as a few years ago some arsehole put his head out of the window of a minibus full of men and shouted "look at the size of those calves!" as I was waiting to cross a road.

Being asked repeatedly as a teenager how it felt to be "the minging sister", and asked if I was adopted as I didn't look anything like my much more attractive sister.

Ordering a pudding in a restaurant and the waiter asking me if I was sure I wanted one.

Giving birth to DS and as I asked for pain relief the midwife chastising me "why are you BEGGING?"

*excited