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AIBU?

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Original poster

Gym girls

235 replies

youcanthandlethetruth · 02/12/2020 23:08

Two of my friends have taken to posting gym selfies.

One has not long had her baby and hit the gym hard, which I applaud. She has taken her wellbeing seriously but I can’t help but think she doesn’t need to post pictures on social media. It’s like a stealth brag. Particularly showing off images of her stomach and she’s wearing a full face of makeup whilst in gym gear.

Another friend has became gym obsessed in the last year. Again I think lockdown might have been a big catalyst but she constantly posts on Facebook about fitness. Constant selfies in the gym. Constant posts about calories, what she’s eaten etc. It’s becoming tedious.

I don’t want to have to unfriend them online. The selfie culture and what I feel is stealth bragging has just became annoying now. Yes, I get that you’re looking well. I recognise you are taking positive steps to maintain your health and well-being but please can you stop posting about your amazing body.

And no I’m not jealous, I’m a size 8 myself. I just hate people who feel the need to show off. Tell me I’m not the only one

OP posts:
Macncheeseballs · 03/12/2020 21:43

Surely true self worth doesn't have to be broadcast for all to see? Tidy sitting rooms not included!

JingsMahBucket · 04/12/2020 00:13

@Macncheeseballs

Surely true self worth doesn't have to be broadcast for all to see? Tidy sitting rooms not included!
Why aren’t tidy sitting rooms included in your derision? Why are only fitness pictures worthy of derision?
Wingingit247 · 04/12/2020 17:48

Social media is the ultimate cancer of society, we're all starting to live in a completely fabricated world with less and less sense of what really matters any more, I'd just switch it off if I were you.

Feministicon · 04/12/2020 17:57

I’d really like to know what actually is acceptable to post on social media, people complain on here about everything 😂 just delete your account

Macncheeseballs · 04/12/2020 18:07

Posting pics of ones own body is very different to pics of a tidy sitting room, but I'm just not into that sort of thing

Wilkie1956mog · 04/12/2020 18:32

Agree with you OP. It's tiresome how some people show off online.

reiki21 · 04/12/2020 18:36

Why do you care ? Part of what they're doing is probably because they have been judged or have judged others in the past or are still doing it. Rise above it. Find something worthwhile to focus your attention. Go help someone and stop judging others. Life is short. I'm curious that you call these people 'friends' when such a trivial thing sets you off like this to the extent you want to dump them ? Ask yourself if you are really a friend of theirs. Perhaps you dumping them would be doing them a favour.

FelicisNox · 04/12/2020 18:55

YABU because you're only seeing this from your point of view.

If you're bored of their selfies just unfollow them and then you won't have to see them. Problem solved.

You say you're not jealous because you're a size 8: slim does not equal healthy which I'm sure you know that so are you sure you're not just a tiny bit jealous? Maybe you could join them?

These women are clearly feeling amazing about themselves and as we all know, good self esteem is hard to come by, especially when you've just had a baby or have been suffering from lock down blues..... let them get on with it if it makes them happy, they're not hurting anyone and actually, I don't like the idea of accusing folks of "stealth bragging". As a nation we're raised to believe that we can't celebrate our achievements because it's bragging (which is unacceptable) and it's not. Since when are we not allowed to be pleased with ourselves?

No. Not buying into that toxic mindset thanks and you shouldn't either.

bemusedmoose · 04/12/2020 19:05

I don't get it either. It's incredibly vain. Like looking in the mirror every 3 secs but making the world look too. Just seems so needy.

I manage to work out and never take a pic or post about my diet.

Probably why I only have Facebook and only for friends to far away to see.

Just can't be doing with all the look at me I'm so wonderful crap. It's just a fake world of shallow appearance is everything nonsense.

Frieswithanythin · 04/12/2020 19:14

I unfollowed a girl on my fb account. Constant gym selfies, bragging about fitness boot camps, running at night. But I watch her every single day get in her car and drive her large 4x4 practically a 4/5 min walk to the local primary school, rain or shine. No excuses why she can’t walk. She’s a stay at home mum.

Badwill · 04/12/2020 19:21

These women are clearly feeling amazing about themselves and as we all know, good self esteem is hard to come by

See I think the opposite of these people. If you have good self esteem the last thing you need is the validation and admiration of a load of random acquaintances on the internet. I think most show-offs are riddled with insecurity.

Desperately seeking praise is a weakness of character, not a strength.

Luckily I don't know/follow too many of these gym selfie type people - but there's a reason for that!

nancybotwinbloom · 04/12/2020 19:32

These posts make me want to get my arse in gear and do exercise

Jellyrunner · 04/12/2020 19:51

YABU for calling them gym girls, I am assuming these are grown up woman? Sounds bloody patronising to me. They however are free to post whatever they want; social media has its pros and cons, ups
and downs. But it’s not your place to judge

What’s your problem?

LolaSmiles · 04/12/2020 19:59

The thing is, everyone takes pride in different things and sees different things as worth the hard work.
A friend of mine who does (very beautiful) craft projects and constantly posts pics of them on all social media is very scathing about another friend of ours who works very seriously and posts regular progress updates/pics of her (frankly amazing) muscle tone and amazing running PBS.
I see them as being the same, keen to show off the results of their hard work and talent but craft friend is so rude about fitness friend, saying to me that she's vain, self-obsessed etc.
I think it boils down to snobbery really

I agree with this ^^ There is something about people engaging in fitness that seems to bring out the claws.

I'd roll my eyes a bit at the endless calorie sharing much in the same way I'd roll my eyes at anyone sharing endless details that nobody cares about, but some selfies and achievements don't bother me.

Unless they're holding up other people using the machines, then there's a special place in hell for people causing queues by sitting on their phone.

Justbrutallyhonest · 04/12/2020 20:48

All social media is about self promotion, don’t use it

Rachel1874 · 04/12/2020 20:59

You can usually unfollow rather than unfriend. But you have to remember people usually only put what they want you to see on social media.

JoanWilderbeast · 04/12/2020 21:34

I don't know about gym girls, but hearing about Leslie Sansone's, Just Walk from a (thank you) random Mums Netter's recommendation has set me off on a voyage of fitness :)

Macncheeseballs · 04/12/2020 21:49

I love fitness, I just don't see the need to show off my body

SurroundedByIdiotsEverywhere · 05/12/2020 00:00

YANBU
It's vanity, I find it funny, they take dozens of pictures, pulling faces, weird body angles trying to get what they think looks good and they post the best one in their eyes, caked in make-up! Then they live off likes & loves by people clicking! hahaha

Just laugh and move on like most of us do.

itslikethathun · 05/12/2020 03:04

@youcanthandlethetruth

Two of my friends have taken to posting gym selfies.

One has not long had her baby and hit the gym hard, which I applaud. She has taken her wellbeing seriously but I can’t help but think she doesn’t need to post pictures on social media. It’s like a stealth brag. Particularly showing off images of her stomach and she’s wearing a full face of makeup whilst in gym gear.

Another friend has became gym obsessed in the last year. Again I think lockdown might have been a big catalyst but she constantly posts on Facebook about fitness. Constant selfies in the gym. Constant posts about calories, what she’s eaten etc. It’s becoming tedious.

I don’t want to have to unfriend them online. The selfie culture and what I feel is stealth bragging has just became annoying now. Yes, I get that you’re looking well. I recognise you are taking positive steps to maintain your health and well-being but please can you stop posting about your amazing body.

And no I’m not jealous, I’m a size 8 myself. I just hate people who feel the need to show off. Tell me I’m not the only one

All my friends do it. Each one is gorgeous with big social media followings, people like to see what they are doing and are inspired by it. Couldn't ever imagine feeling annoying by their posts. Happy to see them doing well, feeling proud of themselves and I LOVE supporting them. You know why? Cause I'm not a nasty jealous girl and women like me SUPPORT EACH OTHER. All I can say is I wouldn't want you as my friend 
Picoloangel · 05/12/2020 07:18

IMO 99% of posts on social media are stealth boasts. I like and use social media but it stopped being about keeping in touch years ago.

user1472151176 · 05/12/2020 08:11

Yup social media in general. Just unfollow.

winniestone37 · 05/12/2020 08:55

It’s odd and feeds into a narrative that we’ve all been fed our entire lives that our value is largely defined by how we look. Additionally social media means we also continually outsource our need for validation. Obviously it should come from within. It’s like a plague that we’ve all been led to believe is normal. It’s great to work on yourself sad that you need others to validate it for it to be truly worthwhile. I should add I’ve been as guilty as the next person with this but am now trying to change as I realised it adds nothing to my life and Without sounding too wanky I’m enough (before and after I’ve lifted weights for an hour 😅).

Harls1969 · 05/12/2020 10:06

I do get your point but everyone has the right to post what they want on their own social media page. We have the right to unfollow or scroll past, rolling our eyes. Don't let it ruin your day

SmoggieC · 05/12/2020 11:13

Good for thrm for doing something positive with their health