Gym girls

[youcanthandlethetruth]

Two of my friends have taken to posting gym selfies.

One has not long had her baby and hit the gym hard, which I applaud. She has taken her wellbeing seriously but I can’t help but think she doesn’t need to post pictures on social media. It’s like a stealth brag. Particularly showing off images of her stomach and she’s wearing a full face of makeup whilst in gym gear.

Another friend has became gym obsessed in the last year. Again I think lockdown might have been a big catalyst but she constantly posts on Facebook about fitness. Constant selfies in the gym. Constant posts about calories, what she’s eaten etc. It’s becoming tedious.

I don’t want to have to unfriend them online. The selfie culture and what I feel is stealth bragging has just became annoying now. Yes, I get that you’re looking well. I recognise you are taking positive steps to maintain your health and well-being but please can you stop posting about your amazing body.

And no I’m not jealous, I’m a size 8 myself. I just hate people who feel the need to show off. Tell me I’m not the only one

I agree, its cringey, vain and self obsessed

And I don't mind being called a girl

I think it says far more about you than them really. What people post on their own social media has no impact on my life, my decisions, my morals, my children, actually on absolutely no part of my life.

If I'm not interested I ignore. If I think the person posting needs a reply I reply, but more often than not I just press 'like' and scroll on because it's no skin off my nose to give them a 'like'.

Presumably people post this stuff for a variety of reasons, they might need validations, or are genuinely excited/pleased, or need to present a lifestyle for their own self esteem, there are lots of reasons, but none of them are to do with me.

As the viewer you have many options. You can come off social media altogether, you can unfollow, or snooze. But you don't, so you must have your own reasons for that. The same as they have their reasons for doing it.

But to look down on, or bitch about your friends and family (I'm assuming here these are not unknown people on your friends list) because of your own snobby values about what others should or should not post is frankly revolting.

Sort your own social media use out and stop thinking about other peoples reasons for doing it. It's not your business and the power to not see it is totally within your control.

I wasn’t suggesting you remove make up before arriving at the gym, but if you haven’t sweet enough to blur it off by time you leave, you’re not working out you’re posing!
I’m not returning to this thread, it’s already turned nasty enough.

Someone asked you why you cared about gym selfies and you replied, "It doesn't particularly impact me but I have dc so I have to care."

No I was responding to the notion of if you don't like, don't look. My point is I have to have an awareness because my dc are growing up with SM. Not using it myself doesn't mean I don't have an opinion.
I also said upthread I don't like posts of dc.

SM most certainly throws up it's own set of issues that we should address, but gym selfies?

Selfie culture is a thing is it not? are gym selfies excluded from that?

What people are inviting you, OP and others to ask yourselves is why you have this strong moralistic response to women posting pictures of themselves on treadmills, because you clearly have.

Where have I singled out specifically women & only gym selfies?

Why are you so offended by what others think about how some people use SM?

You can do a weights workout and not sweat makeup off. If they are sculpted, they will be focusing on lifting etc, not cardio.

I think it's important to only add people you genuinely like, then you are happy for them.

My DD posys the odd gym/martial art workout. She trained from no exercise, little muscle tone after bf two children and has achieved a lot. I don't see the difference between sharing that, than anything else people share.

I'm not that interested in the elf on the shelf arrivals, so I've scrolled past. There's lots of things that people post that we wouldn't. That's just the variety of life. No different to ehen people went to social clubs every weekend and told everyone about what they had been doing. At least we now get a choice whether we look at holiday photo albums.

What do people think SM is for exactly?

I thank god my gym has clear signs up saying no phones allowed on gym floors! Because some people may take a pic of themselves but other people in the background who get trolled, or some are malicious take a pic of someone without consent and post it with malicious intent.

You know an argument is weak when its only defence is "well I'm allowed to say it".

How is that my argument? My argument is that there are negatives to SM including selfie culture hence why I have an opinion about it even though I only use MNs. Do you really think selfie culture has no drawbacks?

@KittenCalledBob

If you work hard you're entitled to show it off - OK, but your friends are also entitled to find your posts tedious and annoying.

Of course, just like I find constant posts about how amazing their partners are, but hey it's their social media and they can post what they want. People post their cars, houses etc, that can be construed as bragging. If someone doesn't like to see it, either unfriend or unfollow, it really is simple.

Well OP you’ve touched a nerve!

Fucking hell. How did people ever develop self esteem before the advent of the selfie and the like button?

I only once took a photo in the gym and it was of one of the tv’s because I was so happy to be able to use the cross trainer AND watch Homes under the hammer ...
Facebook, Instagram and the like are not for me , I don’t like show offs or attention seekers and that seems to be the only thing social media is for .
And before anyone uses the old “ I use it to keep in touch with family” , that’s what I use WhatsApp for .

@boomshakey

Someone asked you why you cared about gym selfies and you replied, "It doesn't particularly impact me but I have dc so I have to care."

No I was responding to the notion of if you don't like, don't look. My point is I have to have an awareness because my dc are growing up with SM. Not using it myself doesn't mean I don't have an opinion.
I also said upthread I don't like posts of dc.

SM most certainly throws up it's own set of issues that we should address, but gym selfies?

Selfie culture is a thing is it not? are gym selfies excluded from that?

What people are inviting you, OP and others to ask yourselves is why you have this strong moralistic response to women posting pictures of themselves on treadmills, because you clearly have.

Where have I singled out specifically women & only gym selfies?

Why are you so offended by what others think about how some people use SM?

You are aware that opening your eyes wide and asking "Why are you offended?" doesn't actually mean I am offended, right? And you realise it doesn't fool anyone else either, right?

It's a thread about gym selfies and it's what you were being asked about, so yes, that's what your answers could reasonably be taken to be referring to. You very clearly have an objection (I think you tried to insult me earlier by suggesting I'm the kind of person who takes lots of selfies?) and you're being invited to question it, because there isn't really any reason for it. You don't like it, scroll on or mute if it's dull.

I see you're now trying to turn this into a "social media in general and especially selfies" thing, presumably because the comment about your children really does look ridiculous in the context of the thread. As it happens, I don't really care about selfies. Artists have been painting themselves for centuries. I don't think adults posting photos of themselves on social media to an audience that presumably chooses to see them is a terrible offence. I'm a lot more concerned about online safety and security, revenge porn and so on. I'm a big enough girl to come off social media when I need a break from it, and to tailor my news feed to show content I like to see and ignore anyone who doesn't turn me on, so to speak.

We do have to be careful about what our kids view and how it might affect them, but a) it was ever thus and b) I can honestly say that if my daughter, in future years, sees a picture of a woman on a cross trainer, I truly do not give a shit. And if she wanted to post pictures of herself there because she's just had a baby in a pandemic and it helps her to stay motivated and feel positive and connected, I wouldn't have a problem with that either.

I find the mean spirit of this thread far more objectionable.

You are aware that opening your eyes wide and asking "Why are you offended?" doesn't actually mean I am offended, right? And you realise it doesn't fool anyone else either, right?

What are you talking about?

It's a thread about gym selfies and it's what you were being asked about, so yes, that's what your answers could reasonably be taken to be referring to.

The OP specifically referenced selfie culture & stealth bragging. None of my posts on this thread have inferred I was only talking about women on treadmills.

I see you're now trying to turn this into a "social media in general and especially selfies" thing, presumably because the comment about your children really does look ridiculous in the context of the thread

I haven't done a volte-face have I? My posts have always been general. I mentioned the selfie death accidents last night so I've hardly just switched the conversation.

I'm a big enough girl to come off social media when I need a break from it, and to tailor my news feed to show content I like to see and ignore anyone who doesn't turn me on, so to speak.

Good for you, but my dc still need to learn that.

b) I can honestly say that if my daughter, in future years, sees a picture of a woman on a cross trainer, I truly do not give a shit

Again good for you but I think selfie culture can have an impact on mental health particularly for teens.

I think you tried to insult me earlier by suggesting I'm the kind of person who takes lots of selfies?)

Oh so you did get the joke 👏🏻

@boomshakey

You are aware that opening your eyes wide and asking "Why are you offended?" doesn't actually mean I am offended, right? And you realise it doesn't fool anyone else either, right?

What are you talking about?

It's a thread about gym selfies and it's what you were being asked about, so yes, that's what your answers could reasonably be taken to be referring to.

The OP specifically referenced selfie culture & stealth bragging. None of my posts on this thread have inferred I was only talking about women on treadmills.

I see you're now trying to turn this into a "social media in general and especially selfies" thing, presumably because the comment about your children really does look ridiculous in the context of the thread

I haven't done a volte-face have I? My posts have always been general. I mentioned the selfie death accidents last night so I've hardly just switched the conversation.

I'm a big enough girl to come off social media when I need a break from it, and to tailor my news feed to show content I like to see and ignore anyone who doesn't turn me on, so to speak.

Good for you, but my dc still need to learn that.

b) I can honestly say that if my daughter, in future years, sees a picture of a woman on a cross trainer, I truly do not give a shit

Again good for you but I think selfie culture can have an impact on mental health particularly for teens.

I think you tried to insult me earlier by suggesting I'm the kind of person who takes lots of selfies?)

Oh so you did get the joke 👏🏻

Good, solid answers! I have been told most firmly!

(I realised it was an insult but I still don't see why it was funny or, indeed, relevant.)

Good, solid answers! I have been told most firmly!

Wow you read that fast but great news, Im glad you agree with me!

(I realised it was an insult but I still don't see why it was funny or, indeed, relevant.

It was funny to me & that's all thats relevant. You are indeed irrelevant 😜

I don't think about how others will feel when I post a pic, it's usually just because I feel good about myself. I realise that sounds selfish but I don't think most people give a second thought when they pop a photo online! Saying that, I'm a bit of an oddity in that I find gym pics inspirational but I know I'm in the minority here.

@youcanthandlethetruth

I just feel like all we see now is people taking pictures of themselves on every opportunity, speaking about how they feel, what they did, why they did it, where they are, what they achieved, where they went.

What ever happened to doing something because you wanted to or just enjoy it.

For me- gym pics and hospital tags are the worst

But they are doing something that they enjoy - posting on social media.

OP, delete social media. It is very clearly just not for you, and is bringing out the worst in you I imagine. As it seems to be for quite a lot of people on here too.

If you're so bothered by people posting their hobbies, achievements, life updates, however mundane or "braggy" they are, then just take a step back. It's YOUR problem, not theirs. They are doing literally nothing wrong, positing updates on their own social media about their own life. Whereas you're passing judgement, viewing them negatively and allowing it to annoy you. It honestly shouldn't get to you like this, unless deep down something else was annoying you about it so I'd suggest for your own mental health, just step back.

Also, friends are meant to support each other, motivate each other, be proud of each other. If you can't do that for these ladies, then I wouldn't consider yourself a friend and it's even more reason to step away from the situation! But whilst stepping away, you should recognise it's your issue, and not try to place the blame on them.

I agree, its cringey, vain and self obsessed

Meh. It won't stop me!

I hear you op ! Joined a gym last year and left pretty sharpish when my 6 weeks membership was up. I admire anyone who works out to feel good and look good but this was madness. Girls wearing barely anything with full faces of makeup hair done bending over and squatting while getting their mates to take pics and film them. Men equally scantly clad videoing themselves while on the treadmill and standing around watching the girls 'work out' . I complained to management about the use of mobile phones and the hygiene issue of almost naked bodies on the machines and all I got was a shrug. Don't get me wrong there were plenty of appropriately dressed members who were there to get their workout done but as I said it was very uncomfortable when people all around you are taking selfies and using videoing themselves.

But what is actually wrong with being vain, proud or a bit braggy? At worst it's very boring. At best it's hilarious to see.

I think you were unlucky @BeTheHokeyMan. I’ve been a member of a fair few gyms and never experienced that.

BeTheHokeyMan Girls wearing barely anything with full faces of makeup hair done bending over and squatting while getting their mates to take pics and film them.

Maybe you should stop staring at "girls" then and concentrate on your workout. Or go to a gym used by adults?

Yup! There's a serious dearth of humility

Well, you crack on with the humility. And I'll take care of the vanity? Deal????

Eh, I don’t really care. All social media is pretty much pointless, by its very nature. You could say many of the same things about this thread- whatever happened to keeping a thought in your head instead of sharing on a forum to have other people validate it?