URGENT - school gate crisis, ive got an hour!

[SlipperTripper]

This is complicated, I'll try to be brief.

DSD15 is a shit at school, and has been locked in an ongoing fight with a similar twat of a child for months.

Both girls were excluded for a fortnight following a physical fight three weeks ago, and have been back a week.

Other girl has been very vocal towards DSD (who is no angel, I 100% believe she's been giving back as good as she gets) but no more physical incidents.

Today I have been asked to pick her up 10mins early as the other girl has assembled some adult male relatives to meet DSD outside school, and beat her up. Cousins, I believe.

According to DSD, these people actually turned up in the school reception earlier.

Whilst I am disgusted with DSDs behaviour, and that of the other girl on an ongoing basis, I feel that this has crossed a line into something totally different. Moving from a school spat to a planned, well, attack.

What the hell should my next move be?!?

Do I turn up at school prepared to collect and whizz home ignoring the potential issue, do I notify the police, or do I approach them myself and say 'for Christ's sake, what ARE you doing?'

The pissed off side of me wants to just March up and say wtf is wrong with you all, but my sensible head says if they're prepared to walk into a school to smack a child, I'm likely to end up with a thump?!?

Honestly, I have never known of anything so bloody ridiculous in all my life, and must stress how absolutely disgusted I am at everyone involved. But right now, I have an hour to work out how to manage this! HELP!

(I am at the end of my tether with this, it been a long line of issues this year, and I just want some fucking respite. But that's another thread)

[EvilPea]

If they've been into the school already today, I am another one echoing to get her now. I am also going to echo the police, and a long chat with her.
I would also consider moving school, fresh start and fresh attitude, new friends and no known status to maintain or reinforce.


I say all that assuming you have had a long hard talk to make sure she isn't being bullied etc.

[lyralalala]

@DoYouMeanMe

School and police stay very much out each other's way. And they do anything to avoid stepping on each other's toes....

Not true in my experience of many years working in schools.

In my experience of working in schools the police and school either work very well hand-in-hand or not at all (usually because the school are reluctant to involve them). Very little middle ground.

[TurquoiseDragon]

Check with the school on how true this is, and then call police if required.

[NoIDontWatchLoveIsland]

Police but maybe talk to your DH about a plan with DSDs mother to try and move her away from this whole situation and get a fresh start. Change of school?

[HmmSureJan]

If this happened at DD's school the police would send a presence to the supervise the end of school day exit. It's happened a few times.

Hope you've called them!

[hedgehogger1]

Call the police

[lyralalala]

And I’d love to know why it seems to be your decision here, and you asking MN - and not one of her parents.

Because clearly the OP is the one picking up and looking after the DSD today.
It doesn’t matter a jot why that is and isn’t remotely relevant to the question of what to do right now.

[HavelockVetinari]

Police immediately!

Bloody hell, what is the world coming to - grown men coming to a school to beat up a wee girl. Poor child, I know she's probably not innocent but nothing she could've done warrants this sort of thing.

[Meraas]

Today I have been asked to pick her up 10mins early

This is very vague, who has asked you, OP?

[LITHIUMcomeasUare]

Involve the police.

[Awwlookatmybabyspider]

I'd be going there now to collect. I agree about changing schools as well. As PP says they let a group of random blokes into a school to threaten or with the intention of threatening a child. It doesn't bare thinking of but imagine if they had weapons. To call it a safe guarding issue doesn't even come close to covering it. It goes with out saying you also need to inform the police.
I tell you what those "men" would go down like a sack of spuds if they were in a one on one fight with a big burly bloke down the pub.
All this over bloody kids falling out.

[draughtycatflap]

Put on your jumpsuit and curly wig, strap your flamethrower gun to your hip and practice saying “get away from her you bitch!” before going up the school to confront the fuckers.

[LilyLongJohn]

Police, they are essentially planning to physically assault a young girl. You wouldn't stand by and let that happen outside of school, so call the police and tell them exactly what the school has told you

[Freddiefox]

@Aquamarine1029

Why isn't your husband, or her mother, dealing with this shit? His daughter, his problem.

For goodness sake, some families blend really well. Some work as a team or a partnership and actually care about their family members whether that are step children, in laws or other.

[HmmSureJan]

I know this is very serious but this comment 😂 some people really have no clue what the police do. Or how many police officers we actually have.

At my DD's school they would be there. I've seen it with my own eyes at least four times over the past three years.

[Passmethefrazzles]

I’d like to think the head teacher will have called the police but please please please call them yourself without delay.

[MillieVanilla]

I would be absolutely livid that school haven't treated as a huge safe guarding issue and excluded the girl and got police involved. To just tell you to collect DSD 10 minutes early puts you both at risk of extreme violence from adult males.
I would be on the phone the local authority and the police. What a disgrace!

[Strangedayindeed]

Phone the school. This is unacceptable the other girl should be excluded.

[MrsToothyBitch]

Police!!
Can you also quietly negotiate an earlier pick-up, with either police or SLT in attendance? If these meat-heads are happy to beat-up or at least imply that they'd consider beating up a teenage girl, I wouldn't feel safe at all, either.

[Runmybathforme]

Please, please give us an update later. Hope nothing awful happens, take care. X

[TeachesOfPeaches]

Call the school and tell them you are picking up DSD now as she isn't safe and ask them WTF they plan to do about it

[NerrSnerr]

I hope you're not being expected to deal with this alone and her mum and dad are also very involved.

I echo what everyone else says about calling school and police.

[PullTheBricksDown]

Also want to know who asked OP to do the 10 minutes early pick up. And whether school, on seeing a bunch of angry blokes turn up in reception, have let them in and said 'just take a seat in the waiting area'.

[Anxioustoddler]

Collect her now, I’ve seen situations like this end badly. It happens a lot, rough families love to get the older relatives involved. Good luck.

[Elfieishere]

Pick her up now. Not 10 mins early and call the police.