SIL has covid and wants us to come for xmas

[Friendsoftheearth]

SIL, BIL and all three dc are just recovering from covid, they will be allowed out again in a few days - despite some of them being relatively high risk they were all ill but fine, so very relieved and happy about that.

However this evening SIL has invited us to her house for christmas - in laws have already passed away - and we are the only family she has. The can't come to us as one of their dc will need to work, and will be joining us later.

SIL said it is great news as she now can't catch covid, so we can relax. DH does not see it that way, and does not want to go, he is worried her house will be covered in covid, and sees the grown up dc as still a risk as no doubt they will go out and party for England. They are late teens and do love to party, which is why they were probably ill in the first place.

Is it is true we are now relatively 'safe' as it will be a month by the time we get to christmas? Are they are a fairly safe bet, or are they still a risk? I know you can get covid twice, but the antibodies are likely to last longer than a month surely? Dh is digging up info that confirms covid stays on surfaces for up to 76 days, and we are putting ourselves and children at risk by even considering seeing them.

I am close to SIL and would like to see them, but not if we are all going to be ill afterwards. DD asthmatic, but otherwise 49-55 age bracket with teen dc. Thank you!

Where on earth is he finding that? Is he sure he hasn't misread days for hours, which is much more accurate?
I think he was disappointed not to find more 'facts' on surface/touching

@ViciousJackdaw

Boris Johnson had covid in April. Ask yourself this: Why is Johnson in self-isolation right now?

Because he has to be seen to be Doing The Right Thing, even if it's bollocks.

he is worried her house will be covered in covid

Oh, FFS.

‘Because he has to as they are the rules he set out himself .’

Since when did Boris follow any sort of rules?

Does COVID stay on surfaces that are cleaned?
Unless you SIL doesn’t clean for a month then it’s unlikely there’ll be COVID in the house

@Friendsoftheearth

Dh is not so keen on family christmases admittedly, he spends his life working from home and does not understand why anyone would risk it at all. The vaccine will soon be here, and we should wait for that.....

I'm completely with your DH on this.

I don't understand people thinking just because the govt have 'allowed' it, it makes it any safer! The virus will not be taking 5 days off, no matter what Boris & pals 'Allow'

I'm staying home, on my own, hoping to avoid Covid. The vaccine isn't far away & then spring/summer I can see those I love... I don't understand people who can't see how much of a risk they're taking. Madness to me.

Why not skip this year? Tell them that you're grateful for the invite but will be having a quiet one indoors. Tricky isn't it, I have the same problem. Will be watching with interest x

Go and see SIL, leave husband at home? She sounds like more fun

Just go and leave him at home. No reason for you to miss out too.

"covered in covid"? What in the actual fck?
Viruses cant survive forever on surfaces for goodness sakes- usually 48 hours max. If viruses were this hardy and survivalist you would never be without a cold because you'd just constantly re-infect yourself over and over and over again.

Your husband is being paranoid and ridiculous.

It is tricky claire I don't want to make our family feel like lepers, it is not as if they will still be ill, it is in a month's time.
I am so sad we have hardly seen anyone, and I am very doubtful about anything happening in January or February - so it is either now or never.

Just to be clear, we would NOT be going if this hadn't happened, as they are definitely a risky family, very sociable and lovely - but high risk all the same.

It’s the safest place you can go - they can’t infect you or you them. COVID does not live on surfaces for 30 days. There’s unlikely to be sufficient viral load after a few hours to cause infection

camp he needs to drive! There is no way I am going to stay sober on the one and only christmas outing I am likely to have!!

Your DH seriously thinks that the house will be 'covered in Covid' at Christmas?

Wha?!

He sounds nuts!

I think he is scarred from the reoccurring sickness/Norovirus that we had one year, when we did become reinfected over and over again for six whole weeks.

@year5teacher

Your husband is worried the house will be “covered in covid” a month later?

Why does he think Covid will be all over the house a month later? Even at the height of all the restrictions scientists weren't claiming it lived on surfaces for weeks.

I have had Covid. It's now 7 weeks on and I'm back at work this week. I'm in the same work environment, in close contact with people, etc. There is no concern that I could still be contagious.

There has never been any thought that my home could be contagious weeks later!

I wouldn't.

YABU if you do go.

If I can be honest there is a weird stigma here attached to people that have had covid. Our neighbour was taken to hospital with the virus, and was ill for two weeks - came out and told everyone he had pneumonia because he was worried his work would dry up, and people would not allow him to come. It is very strange, and I am not sure it is intentional more instinctive.

Why wouldn't you go? Please explain, because this is dh's position and he is being quite unusually stubborn about it.

@ViciousJackdaw

Boris Johnson had covid in April. Ask yourself this: Why is Johnson in self-isolation right now?

Because he has no choice. Having Covid doesn't make you exempt from self isolation.

Whilst scientists believe there is immunity they haven't decided on how long, though almost all seem to believe it should be at least 3-6 months for most people.

The number of documented people catching it and testing positive twice in separate occasions is still very uncommon.

There must be other people in this position, what have they decided to do?

I would not go, but we will not be going into anyone’s home for Christmas unless aliens/Santa/a god magically rid the world of Covid between now and then.

While I agree that the break over the christmas period doesn't lessen the risk of covid, and it's probably sensible for most people to simply have a quiet christmas at home (single people should still be able to form support bubbles, and I do think their are certain understandable exemptions such as a terminally ill person wanting to have their last christmas), to be worried that your SILs house will be covered in covid a month later is ridiculous.

Maybe dh was looking forward to our own christmas for once, that is what I thought initially but he really feels funny about being in 'someones' house, especially somewhere with so much covid.

What is 'covid'?