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Original poster

SIL has covid and wants us to come for xmas

277 replies

Friendsoftheearth · 24/11/2020 20:12

SIL, BIL and all three dc are just recovering from covid, they will be allowed out again in a few days - despite some of them being relatively high risk they were all ill but fine, so very relieved and happy about that.

However this evening SIL has invited us to her house for christmas - in laws have already passed away - and we are the only family she has. The can't come to us as one of their dc will need to work, and will be joining us later.

SIL said it is great news as she now can't catch covid, so we can relax. DH does not see it that way, and does not want to go, he is worried her house will be covered in covid, and sees the grown up dc as still a risk as no doubt they will go out and party for England. They are late teens and do love to party, which is why they were probably ill in the first place.

Is it is true we are now relatively 'safe' as it will be a month by the time we get to christmas? Are they are a fairly safe bet, or are they still a risk? I know you can get covid twice, but the antibodies are likely to last longer than a month surely? Dh is digging up info that confirms covid stays on surfaces for up to 76 days, and we are putting ourselves and children at risk by even considering seeing them.

I am close to SIL and would like to see them, but not if we are all going to be ill afterwards. DD asthmatic, but otherwise 49-55 age bracket with teen dc. Thank you!

OP posts:
compulsiveliar2019 · 24/11/2020 20:21

@dementedpixie

I'd just say no this year tbh whether they had had it or not. Drop presents off but no need to stay for a visit. I'm going nowhere this Christmas
Good for you. Spend Christmas on your own if you wish but don't make people feel guilty for not doing the same!
bengalcat · 24/11/2020 20:22

Have they all had a positive test ?

Original poster
Friendsoftheearth · 24/11/2020 20:23

Yes they all caught covid, one after the other. It is true what they say about household transmission. They all tested positive, and in a day or two they will be completely over it, and are feeling well.

I would say they are the perfect people to see.

We are not seeing my parents, as they are shielding regardless of gov guidelines, and we had decided not to see anyone this christmas, so this has thrown a spanner in the works. I love SIL so would love to go if it was safe(ish)

OP posts:
Racoonworld · 24/11/2020 20:24

You’ll be save from their current covid infection by then but if their teens are pit partying before Christmas I wouldn’t go as they could catch it again.

HavelockVetinari · 24/11/2020 20:25

Your DH is clearly hard of thinking (or unable to read) - there are no studies suggesting covid can live on any kind of surface for a whole bloody month! HmmConfused

Original poster
Friendsoftheearth · 24/11/2020 20:25

Dh is not so keen on family christmases admittedly, he spends his life working from home and does not understand why anyone would risk it at all. The vaccine will soon be here, and we should wait for that.....

OP posts:
Frazzled13 · 24/11/2020 20:27

If it lived on surfaces for 76(!) days in a way that could cause infection we’d all have caught it from every shopping trolley, basket, petrol pump, card machine, shopping, post, any public transport we took, etc etc. Your DH is absurd on this point.

WitchesBritchesPumpkinPants · 24/11/2020 20:27

@PrimalLass

There is pretty much no risk of covid from surfaces. I thought that was fairly settled science by now?
Nope it hasn't.

Why would sanitising surfaces be a thing if it had?

Why would hand washing be a thing if it had?

Etc etc

Original poster
Friendsoftheearth · 24/11/2020 20:28

Teen girls WiLL party, they did before, during and after the lockdown. They were totally indifferent to the risks, and the only surprise to us was that it took this long for them to be infected.

I should imagine the partying will intensify now they have 'survived' covid. All three were very proud of their positive tests, and it featured on every SM page. Clearly not everyone is that worried about the virus, for them due to their age they do not care.

OP posts:
ViciousJackdaw · 24/11/2020 20:28

Boris Johnson had covid in April. Ask yourself this: Why is Johnson in self-isolation right now?

FredtheFerret · 24/11/2020 20:28

Your DH is looking for excuses not to go.

As others have said, they are likely to be the safest people to mix with, and no - Covid can't live on surfaces for a month.

KarlKennedysDurianFruit · 24/11/2020 20:28

Secondary infections are almost non existent and if lived on surfaces that long why hasn't every supermarket worker in the country had it?

MajesticWhine · 24/11/2020 20:29

Of course you won't catch it from them. The safest place you could be I reckon.

TheEmojiFormerlyKnownAsPrince · 24/11/2020 20:29

It’s normal for me.....

Also, can’t it keep returning. You think your better and then it comes back?

Thomasina79 · 24/11/2020 20:29

I had the virus in March and had an antibody test in June which showed antibodies, so your sister in law should be ok to visit in a month!

Original poster
Friendsoftheearth · 24/11/2020 20:31

I personally think Boris took his chance to take some time out to have the space to work out the covid plan and brexit, surely the chances are incredibly low for him? I could be wrong.

OP posts:
Doggybiccys · 24/11/2020 20:32

@FredtheFerret

Your DH is looking for excuses not to go.

As others have said, they are likely to be the safest people to mix with, and no - Covid can't live on surfaces for a month.

This.
Original poster
Friendsoftheearth · 24/11/2020 20:33

We always have so much fun with them, so it would be a damn shame not to see them if they happen to be the only safe people we can see this christmas. As it is, I have had to cancel everything else!

OP posts:
campion · 24/11/2020 20:33

Did your DH not get the memo about airborne transmission?
How is he going to get Covid when they've all had it ? It's the place he's least likely to get it!

By his logic, I'd better tell my DS not to come home for Christmas as he had Covid in October.

Fluffybutter · 24/11/2020 20:34

@ViciousJackdaw

Boris Johnson had covid in April. Ask yourself this: Why is Johnson in self-isolation right now?
Because he has to as they are the rules he set out himself .
MoonJelly · 24/11/2020 20:34

Dh is digging up info that confirms covid stays on surfaces for up to 76 days

Where on earth is he finding that? Is he sure he hasn't misread days for hours, which is much more accurate?

Original poster
Friendsoftheearth · 24/11/2020 20:34

I did remind him that our children go to school every day with 900 other children plus teachers, so the risk really isn't coming from SIL!

OP posts:
NeonIcedcoffee · 24/11/2020 20:35

If your husband still thinks the house will be covered in covid a month later you've got way bigger problems than where you go for Christmas.

MoonJelly · 24/11/2020 20:35

@ViciousJackdaw

Boris Johnson had covid in April. Ask yourself this: Why is Johnson in self-isolation right now?
Well, there is a school of thought that that is because he didn't have it in April, and to be honest no-one would be surprised.
Crakeandoryx · 24/11/2020 20:36

He's being ridiculous and overly dramatic. Does he have anxiety at the moment.

If you don't want to go then don't but tell your DH he needs to rationalise the situation. If he can't he needs to seek help.