AIBU to dictate 10pm as home time..?

[staceyflack]

Trying to decide what is a suitable home time for my 15 and half year old. (When lock down is over) Is 10pm in the week unreasonable? She thinks it is of course - and all of her friends are out much later than her she says. Trying to be fair and safe. Thanks. 🙂

I'd say in by 9.30pm on a school night (and only because some clubs like Scouts etc sometimes don't finish until 9pm) but out until 11 on occasional Fridays/Saturdays is OK.

How long does the trip home take her - I'd be much more sympathetic to a slightly later curfew if she has to travel for 30+ mins than if she is next-door, as then she is actually having to leave the activity not that much past 9.

". And by sunset in winter. "

Sunset in WINTER? Jesus Christ. Growing up in deepest darkest Scotland it was getting dark when school finished during the winter.

I’ve only got little kids but when I was 15 I wasn’t even allowed out in the week unless it was to a supervised activity like a sport or drama class. 10pm was weekend! I may just be hopelessly out of touch but I feel 10pm is too late for the week when you’re in year 10 or 11.

Thinking back to when I was a teenager. Unless it is something organised- the best, well meaning child will get up to no good. Far too late.

Far too late on a school night! I didn’t go out anywhere on a school night at 15 (mind you we lived in a village far from anyone from my school!)

7.30 ish sounds more reasonable to me.

I put yabu as 10pm is too late for a week day. Saturday night hmm I’d say that’s ok but 9.30 would be better! What can a 15 year old do out until 10?

My 11 year old asked me about a year ago what time he’ll be allowed to stay out until while he’s ‘hanging out’ with his friends as a teenager. I told him there won’t be a set time as he won’t just be hanging out. If he’s going to the cinema, or to McDonalds, or to play video games at a friends house etc we will discuss what time, and how, he will be getting home on the day. But he won’t just be going out to hang around in dark parks or on street corners. When I was a teenager only the troublemakers did that.

But he won’t just be going out to hang around in dark parks or on street corners. When I was a teenager only the troublemakers did that.

Unfortunately this year is somewhat different. Covid restrictions means that teens are very limited and meeting other teens in groups outside is about the only thing they can do (one other person at the moment). I wouldn't normally condone it either, but the alternative is not leaving the house.

But they’re going to school at the moment. So they are still seeing other people.

@AmyandPhilipfan

But they’re going to school at the moment. So they are still seeing other people.

Most teens like to meet people out of school as well. And they don't see all their friends at school.

Just "hanging out" is a fairly large part of being a teen!

Really??? Remember you are dealing with young adults here not Army recruits, they need to learn to make safe, informed decisions, and there has to be an element of trust

Really??? Remember you are dealing with young adults here young adults are 18-24 year olds.

@WhatWouldChristineCagneyDo
"were you 16 or 18 when sunset suddenly stopped becoming terribly dangerous or do you still spend the Winter barricaded inside your house for fear of getting darked on?"
😂😂😂