To leave my 7.5 year old home alone today?

[brewbrewbrew]

She's off school as the bubble are isolating and I had school runs to do today.
Was fine for the morning run as dh was here but not for the afternoon one.

I drive a 7 seater car and had been given a curtesy car for the day. This car only has 5 seats and I needed 6 if dd was going to fit in.

I couldn't do anything else at short notice. The others were at school and needed collecting.

I spoke to her beforehand about the dangers and what to do if x or y happened, explained she could use Alexa to call my mobile also if there was a problem. I was gone about 15 minutes in total.
Even if I'd have walked (which isn't so close) she wouldn't have been able to come to the school with me as they've sent the bubble home. But at least next time I can leave her in the car if needs be now we've got the big one back.

I came home and she was where I'd left her, on the sofa watching tv lying down on her iPa

Is this awful of me? I feel so negligent.

You know your own child OP

But to start this thread and in AIBU of all topics, it's pretty obvious you don't know Mumsnet.

Unless you're bored and have a fetish for being typed to death?

@Caplin

Not wrong on all account at all. Please stop spreading rubbish. I am a social worker, if I turn up to someone’s house and a young child is observed alone, assuming the parent cannot be contacted then what do you think I have to do? I have no powers to enter, of course I’d have to call the police and again if the parent could not be contacted then they will force entry as they have a duty of care. They have emergency powers of protection which they can and will use if necessary. Thankfully this isn’t something I’ve encountered often in my job.

[quote Wife2b]@Leannethom85

What if the child was younger? A 4 year old? Would you justify it under the guise of her being in a tough situation? If the only way is to ensure all of the children are safe and given appropriate supervision is to have them all off school then yes, that’s exactly what she should of done. That or notify the school who may or may not be able to offer support.[/quote]
We aren't talking about a 4 year old, so why the dramatic answer?
Do you all let your 7 year olds out to play with their friends, how many actually them when they are out playing...if not then how often do you check up on them, longer than 15 minutes I'm guessing.
The person asking knows her child, if she thinks she's ok for quarter of an hour herself then what's the problem..

I don’t get the comments about perfect parents. Not Leaving a 7 year old home alone doesn’t make us perfect parents.

Also the law around it is a bit of a odd one as actually yes if nothing happens it’s fine and it didn’t happen, however if something did happen and child was alone anything from a fire to break in or accident etc it wouldn’t be taken lightly to authorities.

Op needs must and no harm done. Don't beat yourself up over it. The whole self isolating thing is so hard for families with young children.

The other option that nobody seems to have mentioned is are the other children able to walk home together?

OP, you broke no laws (assuming you're in the UK?) As a parent it's up to you to decide if you feel your child is safe alone or not. You obviously felt she was, or you wouldn't have left her.

I left DS7 for short periods when I considered it absolutely necessary, and when I returned he was, like your DD, in exactly the same place I'd left him. Please ignore judgey posts.

@Leannethom85 no not everyone lets their children out unattended to play, me for one and has never even crossed my mind.

@DangerMouse17

How would they have know how long the child had been left for? Don’t be so stupid. Any call out where there is possibly a safeguarding concern the police have to notify Children’s Services.

@Wife2b

Not acceptable at all OP, sorry. It was negligent, yes your daughter was fine but she might not have been. Had the police been notified they would of forced entry and you’d have a referral to Social Services. It’s not worth the hassle is it?

Sorry but 🤣🤣🤣

Who's going to notify the police, get them there and have them force entry to the property in less than 15 minutes total?

I wouldn't have. Some 7 year olds would panic in emergency so you can't guarantee they'll remember who to call, what to do etc. Memories of child falling off a climbing frame during my last teaching practice : one 7year old calmly alerted teacher on duty ( dealing with a v minor knee scrape so hadn't seen it) while the other child who witnessed it had hysterics & took a good while to calm down. The calm child wasn't the one I'd have expected to be so mature in such an event, she was rather immature for her age normally . Was there no kind neighbour DD could have stayed with for half an hour?

Mine would have been fine for 15 minutes at that age. Neither would have been worried, and they were very sensible.

You did what you had to do and she was fine. If anything she probably felt quite grown up and it will have increased her confidence.

FFS at seven I used to go to the park on my own and meet my friends. At seven l regularly left my youngest on her own. At 8 she walked to school at ten she can is merrily left for a few hours, can cook her self dinner and get herself around are local area.
As long as she knows not to answer the door, your phone number to ring in an a emergency and to run to a neighbour in the unlikely event of a fire she is going to be fine.

Why are people suggesting neighbours or walking, when the child is isolating?

Yanbu and people will be hysterical...

@WorraLiberty
"Unless you're bored and have a fetish for being typed to death?"

Yes AIBU can be death by judgement and OP has suggested guilt straight away, so signed up for her DC being removed pronto.

Do you all let your 7 year olds out to play with their friends, how many actually them when they are out playing...if not then how often do you check up on them, longer than 15 minutes I'm guessing.
The person asking knows her child, if she thinks she's ok for quarter of an hour herself then what's the problem..

None of my children have ever played outside alone, not every one lives in a Lovely little village, we live on a main road in London, no children play out Near me.

That's irresponsible. The whole 'nothing happened' but it could have she's 7.5 she can't make any sensible judgement. YABVU and you know if.

It.*

I assume if SS turned up the child could say through the window that mum would be home soon.

If you let a child play outside on the street at 7 is there a difference to leaving them at home. Technology is so much better nowadays in theory the OP could have had her phone open all the time whilst she was out talking to her DD

Was there no kind neighbour DD could have stayed with for half an hour?

The child was self isolating, why would you put someone else at risk?

At 8 she walked to school at ten she can is merrily left for a few hours, can cook her self dinner and get herself around are local area.
As long as she knows not to answer the door,

So don't answer the door but at 8 walk to school on her own... your logic makes no sense.

@Wife2b have you contacted the police in the last twenty years? An incident would have to be someone at immediate risk to life (which this clearly isnt) to be classified as a code 1 and even then it's unlikely you'd be lucky to get a police car there in under 15 mins.

The next priority rating, which this incident would be classed as, has an aim of attendance within one hour in my local force and that's usually broken. So op could have been back for ages before the police arrived!

And even if they did attend within 15mins they wouldn't immediately break the door down ffs, they would try all other methods including trying to get the child to open it, lookibg for any unlocked doors, hidden keys, or neighbiurs with access and trying to get hold of op first....

@WorraLiberty you’ve missed the point. What if something happened to OP on her way back? Who would know there is a child at home alone? Regardless of the time frame, I’m saying that if the police became aware of a child being home alone then they would have to do a welfare check and if no adult was present or able to be contacted then they would have to use their emergency powers of protection. You don’t actually think they would knock on for 5 mins and then plod on on their own merry way do you?

Maybe you could have taken her with you and then collected the youngest children and had the eldest children walk home.

I'm not wanting to scaremonger but it's obviously playing on your conscience and I hate to say it but it's usually on a rare occasion that is when something will happen.

I never left my child at that age for fear of that. I'd never be able to live with myself if something happened.

"I'm going to the shed, I'll be back in a bit. Do you want to watch Phineas and Ferb?" and you will be back before she even noticed you were gone.

But then I am thinking of my youngest of six and not my PFB, which most of the responders seem to be thinking of. And I am a 70s kid, we were tough.

Remember when you were 7? And DIDNT die because your mum buggered off for half an hour?