To leave my 7.5 year old home alone today?

[brewbrewbrew]

She's off school as the bubble are isolating and I had school runs to do today.
Was fine for the morning run as dh was here but not for the afternoon one.

I drive a 7 seater car and had been given a curtesy car for the day. This car only has 5 seats and I needed 6 if dd was going to fit in.

I couldn't do anything else at short notice. The others were at school and needed collecting.

I spoke to her beforehand about the dangers and what to do if x or y happened, explained she could use Alexa to call my mobile also if there was a problem. I was gone about 15 minutes in total.
Even if I'd have walked (which isn't so close) she wouldn't have been able to come to the school with me as they've sent the bubble home. But at least next time I can leave her in the car if needs be now we've got the big one back.

I came home and she was where I'd left her, on the sofa watching tv lying down on her iPa

Is this awful of me? I feel so negligent.

[Caplin]

@Wife2b

Wow! No on all those counts. Not negligent, not illegal and the police wouldn’t force down the door

Read the link to the actual law above. This is fine.

[MoiraNotRuby]

Imo its fine. Like others have said, in other countries children are treated with more independence at this age. Dont worry about it OP.

[DangerMouse17]

Had the police been notified they would of forced entry and you’d have a referral to Social Services

Utter bollocks. Yes maybe if the house was a death trap and child had been left for 3 days without food, but this is not one of those scenarios.

[ChristmasinJune]

You know your child best! She was fine so fair enough. I've just started leaving my 8 year old for trips of under ten mins. He FaceTimes somebody and I check the neighbours are in and willing to be on standby.
In ordinary times I'd say 7.5 was a bit too young but not shocking. In Covid times, needs must. Don't worry about it.

[OhDearMuriel]

You were in a very awkward position.
I would have reluctantly done the very same as you.
In reality some of us have absolutely no one - i.e. friends/family that can help out due to living very rurally or living huge distances apart etc.

[Iminaglasscaseofemotion]

6 months ago we had people on here telling single mothers to leave their kids the same age at home alone in charge of younger siblings to go for a full shopping, or leave young children in the car, or my absolute favourite, leave them with some random in the queue outside the shop 😂.

[KrisKringlesLeftNostril]

@Wife2b

Not acceptable at all OP, sorry. It was negligent, yes your daughter was fine but she might not have been. Had the police been notified they would of forced entry and you’d have a referral to Social Services. It’s not worth the hassle is it?

Where do you live that the police would receive a report, turn up and force an entry in the 15-20 minutes the OP was gone?
Would be interested to hear from any posters who are social workers if SS would actually be interested.

[Lazypuppy]

I think it was fine and i would have done the same in your situation, 15mins when she is watching tv she probably didn't even realise you were gone

[WeAllHaveWings]

YABU age 7 is too young, regardless of how sensible or mature they appear to be.

You should have made alternative arrangements, no harm done, but think about back up plans for next time.

[Iminaglasscaseofemotion]

I got reported to ss for leaving my 8 year old to take the other two to school (15 mins in total) my son told the school and they reported me! So just be aware of that

What did social services say?

[KrisKringlesLeftNostril]

[quote Wife2b]@Leannethom85

What if the child was younger? A 4 year old? Would you justify it under the guise of her being in a tough situation? If the only way is to ensure all of the children are safe and given appropriate supervision is to have them all off school then yes, that’s exactly what she should of done. That or notify the school who may or may not be able to offer support.[/quote]
4 year old is obviously very different.
OP knows her child, and made a decision based on that. I suspect her decision would have been different had her child been 4 years old.

[ReneeRol]

I left mine alone for an hour at a time from about eight. She had her tablet, phone, helpful neighbours on both sides and we live in a very secure house in a safe area... She loved the independence, never did anything except play games on her tablet and I can trust her to not answer the door or turn on the cooker etc and she knows what to do in a variety of "what ifs".

I think it really depends on the child, the security of the house and neighbourhood, that they know to not answer the door and what to do any number of potential circumstances and that they have access to a phone so they can call if they need to.

Your daughter was presumably safe and happy with the situation. You know how safe your home is, your daughters maturity and access to help if she needs it. As long as those are met, there shouldn't be an issue for short periods.

[mac12]

Eh? Feel like I’m in a parallel universe reading this thread. Not ideal but it was 15 minutes. Don’t beat yourself up over this.

[AllTheUserNamesAreTaken]

@Becsim

How judgemental are the perfect mummies on here?! There are literally thousands of parents in the same predicament as you and have definitely left their child to take others, who are not isolating, to school.

It’s not judgemental. She asked if she was being unreasonable. I didn’t realise we were only supposed to say YANBU.

In my view she was BU. If you think that’s judgemental, tough

[G5000]

I have a 7 year old, happy to leave him for short periods. But I also live in a country where 4-5 year olds are expected to make their own way to school and back, which they manage just fine, so of course 7-year olds can manage to sit on their own sofa for 15 min.

[ExclamationPerfume]

Absolutely not acceptable. She is so young. You made the wrong call.

[BackforGood]

At that age, I wouldn't have left dc1, but at the same age, dc2 or dc3 would have been fine with it.
I'm lucky enough to have great neighbours they could go to if they suddenly felt they needed help (which is incredibly unlikely).

[Griselda1]

It's not legal and it's not sensible. There's not much more to say but you're putting yourself and your child at risk.I'd also be anxious about her talking about being left alone.

[Bringonspring]

The thing that is unreasonable is that you had a few hours to plan but didn’t come up with a solution.

[TheKrakening3]

Totally fine. And if you are in the same predicament tomorrow, do it again.

[Enough4me]

Nothing happened, but you are stressed and it wasn't ideal. Next time maybe book the afterschool club or ask a friend / parent to help?

[Givemeabreak88]

What did social services say?

Ss did call me to discuss it and I will probably be flamed for this but I denied it, wasn’t going to cause issues for myself for what was a one off.

[Writerandreader]

Jesus some madness here. Talk about. Mollycoddling

[Airyfairymarybeary]

You should have walked and had her with you.