To ask what was your 'sliding doors' moment?

[Fairyicecream]

For those that haven't seen the film Sliding Doors, it basically showed how different her life turned out if she caught the train/didn't catch the train.

What was one decision, one moment that could have changed your whole life?

I've been thinking about this a lot lately. A few years ago my marriage went through a bad patch (understatement to say the least). DH talked about leaving. It was the worst time of my life and I honestly don't know how I got through it.

Anyway, i often wonder, what if I had just told him to go? We would now all be living separately and we and our beautiful DC would have a completely different life.

Instead, we are all now happier than we have ever been. But it could have all been so different with that one decision...

Kind of related: my brother and I had tickets to a show but he had accidentally double booked himself so asked me to take a friend instead. No one wanted to come but I didn’t want to miss it so I sold his ticket to a stranger online.

Been together ever since.

*hate that film not had

@PumpkinCheater

I accepted one university offer and not another.

Basically my entire life would be different. Career, friends, DH, kids, town/country of residence.

At the time I made the decision, I remember knowing that all of this stuff might be hanging on it... and also realising that I had no way of telling what either choice would bring.

Yes I was thinking similar. My other option was Liverpool. It would have been a very different experience to my eventual choice. I did meet someone who was at uni at Manchester who I really fancied and wished I'd gone to Liverpool instead as it would have been much closer, but it all worked out in the end.

My husband and I were penpals in the 90s. One day I sent him a text inviting him on holiday with my friends and I. And he said yes (we'd never met, and certainly no romance). That was 20 years ago, we're married, have 2 DC, the friends we each took with us hit it off and they're also married with two DC. And after we moved to a new city together miles from both our home towns, a hometown friend moved here too and met someone in our new group of friends. They now live together.

So our moment encompasses many others lives.
And going back further. We could have easily not ended up as penpals if he'd not seen my advert looking for one where he did.

Choosing European literature over advanced statistics

I still went on to do economics (and arts) but Camus sent me on an existential path

If I hadn't of downloaded tinder for a laugh, I'd have never of met my wonderful DP. I never knew I could find someone that loved and cared for me so much. He filled the void that stemmed from a toxic childhood. I honestly didn't think I would meet anyone decent from tinder!

Worked for a company. Left for another job for 6 years then went back to old company . One year in , got put in a position where I had to speak to someone. 4 years later we are still together . We had actually had many sliding doors moments , just missing each other on occasions . I’m lucky I went back . 😊

If I hadn't begged my ex's uncle to give me a job behind his bar to help me pay my rent after my ex left me, I wouldn't have met my lovely DH. I could have gone to work elsewhere or gone back to my parents, but I am so glad I threw myself on his mercy.

Mine is another teaching one! I trained on a scheme which placed you in a school where there was a vacancy. You could express preferences but otherwise you had to go where you were sent. I ticked a few locations which I knew well and then, almost on impulse, I ticked one more which I knew only a little. Of course, I was placed in a school in that area where my now DH was already working and the rest is history. I don't think our paths would ever have crossed otherwise if it hadn't been for that split-second decision sixteen years ago.

Got invited to two parties on the same night. At the one I picked to go to, I met my husband! I sometimes think how easily I could have gone to the other one and had a completely different life.

The other major one - I was halfway through writing a novel and couldn’t decide whether to give up on it or keep going. I decided to spend one more afternoon on it and that gave me a breakthrough. I finished it, got a literary agent, got a publishing deal and was able to leave a job I hated for a career I have dreamed of since I was a little girl. But I can still see myself sitting at my laptop this afternoon tempted to just shut it down, watch a Buffy re-run and forget about it!

*that afternoon

If I didn’t ring to bring an appointment forward to discuss treatment options I could have died. It’s not the thought of early death that upset me but the thought of my children finding me- they were nearly 5 and 8 at the time. So it was more of a sliding doors moment for my children.

@ilikebooksandplants

Kind of related: my brother and I had tickets to a show but he had accidentally double booked himself so asked me to take a friend instead. No one wanted to come but I didn’t want to miss it so I sold his ticket to a stranger online.

Been together ever since.

Ahh I love this one!

The night I met my dh was the night my dh phoned in sick to go out . ( he worked nights back then ) .
I sometimes wonder what would of happened if he hadn't done that as I was picking really rubbish men which treated me badly.
I also wonder if I would be doing the job I'm doing as I started by a member of dh family getting me a job and training me so it's gone on from there .
It's funny how things work out but it could of still happened as dh lived not far from me we would socialise locally just that was the first time we met and got together.
I do like that film sliding doors .

If I hadn't sent a cold request for a job (by fax) to a company abroad. It changed my whole life.

If 8 had kicked out my ex when he said he wanted to leave I wouldn't have continued to have my heart broken by him till I found out about his affair

Reminds me of the quote from the film riding in cars with boys ‘One day can make your life; one day can ruin your life. All life is is four or five big days that change everything’

If I hadn't gone to work one day 4.5 years ago, I wouldn't have met DP. I hated the job and was going to call in sick that day. We are now expecting our first child!

I also often wonder what my life would've been like had I stayed in sixth form and gone to university.

Another university one - I met a nice American in the laundry room in halls (in London). I'd never asked anyone out (sheltered much) but I thought oh come on neighneigh just do it, and asked him. He was from Boston, where my parents lived for a bit, so we had plenty to talk about. We pottered round London a bit, at the start he said he had a girlfriend back home but why didn't our flats (his all boys, mine all girls) hang out. 20 years later, we are still friends but his flatmate and I have two DC and been together all of those 20 years

If I had decided to stay home instead of going out like I did with some friends, I would not have met my DH. Ironically, he was also debating whether to go out or not but was also convinced by friends.

A couple of months after we met he was made redundant. In six months after that I would be moving away for university. He had been jobseeking everywhere but didn't have much success, until a couple of weeks before I was due to go he gets called for an interview and subsequently got the job in my new university town. We ended up moving on the same day.

So two moments that could have set both of us on different paths. If my DH had not got a job in my university town, I doubt we would have lasted. Following graduation I most likely would have taken a job wherever, whereas because DH was there I found a job nearby.

It's been nearly ten years since we met and it's been over nine years since we both moved away from our hometown. We now have our beautiful family home and our gorgeous 8 month old DD.

Not sure where I would be or what life I would be living if things didn't work out to keep us together both times.

I got on the plane.

I shouldn’t have gotten on the plane.

Meeting DH for our third date. We had had two fairly good dates but then for various reasons I wasn’t sure whether I could be bothered to go on the third - but it was an event and I’d already bought the tickets, so I thought I might as well go. Anyway, we’re now very happily married, own a home together and have DS.

Mine is very sad.

I was a girl guide in 1994, I went on lots of trips with them. One day they were going a day trip and uncharacteristically I decided not to go (my mum thinks it’s because she was skint and I didn’t want to ask for money).

On the way home the bus crashed and killed a number of the guides and leaders.

More than 25 years later I still remember my cousin banging our door screaming for my mum as she had heard about the crash first, and assumed that I was on the bus

Not mine but DH's moment. He managed to wrangle a ticket to an industry conference/event. He skipped out of one talk a bit early to check in on work and grab something to eat before the afternoon sessions. There was only one other person out at the same time and he had a brief chat to her. She got his details and contacted him the following week to ask him to apply for a role she had going. He had none of the specific qualifications but she knew by talking to him that he had the the 'real' skills that would make him successful. He got the job and it really set him on a career path rather than just "jobs". She was an amazing mentor for him and while they have both moved on several roles and companies both our families catch up when we happen to be in the same city.
If DH hadn't slipped out early and had that brief chat I think we'd still be doing much of the same old thing and not really getting anywhere. As it is we have two amazing DC, both work for fantastic companies in great roles, and are having a family adventure after relocating to Australia. Forever grateful to her for the path our life has taken as a result,

Mine is sort of a secret, because I'd never tell DH...

I had recently broken up with a long-term boyfriend, had gone through heartbroken and into the point where I decided to get over it I needed to get under someone else. I had a friend that I'd had an on-off thing with before and one night on a big group night out I got quite drunk and decided he was the ideal solution - but he went home early. I then made my move on a friend of a friend, someone who I'd known for years but never even really spoken to one-on-one, thinking that this was probably a better option because there was no chance I'd get emotionally entangled here so we could just have some no-strings fun. Nine years on, I'm pregnant with our second child...

As I said, DH has no idea that that night plan A was someone else, but I'm so very glad that my friend (who was actually a bit of a dick) went home early!