To ask how did you catch your partner cheating?

[pieinthesky76]

I've been cheated on twice (that I know of) and the worst one.. he had logged into Facebook on my work laptop that we often used at home.

I was presenting and connected my laptop to a projector only for his Facebook to pop up with their entire sordid chat. This was before messenger was a separate app.

I also forgave the idiot for some reason.

Can anyone beat that?

He called me up to tell me he had a urine infection and that I needed to go to the doctors and get some tablets so I couldn't pass it back to him... I was so smitten that it didn't even cross my naive mind till I was sat in the doctors explaining and they made me take a chlamydia test. He never admitted that it was chlamydia despite the medication being correct and my positive test. He made me think I was going crazy and I seriously believed I must have somehow given it to him from a previous partner, although I knew for sure I was clean.
Took me months and lots of very serious red flags including his secret children, before I eventually came to my senses and realised I was being taken for an absolute mug.

I took our 3 kids on holiday in our cats an and DH still had to work for another week then he was joining us. My best friend saw him when her DH took her out to posh French restaurant for her birthday. She said he sat there holding this woman's hand and gazing at her. He did not see my friend. She felt so sick she went home. She rang me crying when she told me. I knew next day DH would be at work. I drove back, packed up his stuff into bin bags, got locks changed and dropped kids to my friends, then rang DH and asked him to come home. He was confused but came to house. I had a male friend there in case DH got nasty. I told him he was not coming back. He played innocent and after an hour he eventually said he had made mistake. I told him it was I who had made 2 mistakes in trusting him and marrying him. He left and stormed off with his stuff. He broke up with girl friend 5 weeks later and kept coming around trying to come back but I was not stupid for a third time. I was so grateful my friend told me.

@littlebitupset I don't mind you asking but why do you want to know?

It's changed my life in many ways, household income is about 78% less than it was for a start, i have to watch what i spend on food, clothes, shoes etc for 3 of us, i have to prioritise repairs to the house or replacement of household goods. I have to keep my car running because I've got 2 autistic adult children who are not able to work at the moment, both are attending college and I have to take one of them to college before going to work. Friendship wise, (other than work friends and the few of my other friends that had nothing to do with either of the lying cheating scumbags) I've not really seen or heard anything from anyone in what was our joint friendship group for over a year. Only 1 person admitted to knowing about the affair but said that everyone knew what was going on and had decided amongst themselves to keep quiet about it. I have no respect for any of them. As for 'd'h and the ow they are welcome to each other, they chose to have an affair and in the process they destroyed 2 marriages, my kids no longer have any respect for their father because he has shown little interest in them since he left, seeing my kids struggle to cope with everything that has happened hurts me more than anything. I also feel sorry for the husband of the ow.

The only way that it has changed me personally is that it has given me trust issues.

I sometimes wonder if the lying cheating scumbags actually trust each other.

Thank you for replying. My friend is in quite a similar position and just wondered how it has impacted someone else specifically.

It hasn't hit her fully yet. Think she's hoping for a reconciliation over Christmas. He's with someone else but she's ignoring it but most of the 'friends' know. Quite horrible.

I mean the friends know about the new partner and treat them as a couple.

My friendship is only with her so separate from their previously tight knit circle.

@littlebitupset I hope your friend gets through this relatively unscathed, it sounds like you are a good friend.

Obviously what I have written is a very sanitised version. We were together for over 25 years, no money worries, we didn't argue, I genuinely thought that we would be together for life. When I found out about the affair we talked for hours and I felt that we could get over it but he went and met up with her again a couple of days later. That told me all I needed to know.

You're right it is horrible to find out that your circle of friends know about an affair and that they just accept it.

Look out for your friend, she may need you. Do they have children?

They were together since school and have three children. He's been her whole life. She is brilliant though and I think she has a whole new chapter ahead of her so hopefully she'll see the positives long term. I'm just hoping he isn't a shit financially.

First BF, aged 18: saw them engaging in foreplay
ExDH: found a duffle bag full of her clothing in his bedroom. He'd been screwing her for a month while I was away. Three months later he informed me she was pregnant. So was I. The kids were born three weeks apart.

@TheyAreMinerals

First BF, aged 18: saw them engaging in foreplay ExDH: found a duffle bag full of her clothing in his bedroom. He'd been screwing her for a month while I was away. Three months later he informed me she was pregnant. So was I. The kids were born three weeks apart.

That is awful. I can’t imagine how that must have been to go through. Do the children have any kind of relationship with each other?

Two words "genital warts"

@DontTouchTheMoustache Two words fucking shagger

He left the fancy hotel room booking confirmation open on his laptop as I was wandering the house trying to calm a screaming baby in the middle of the night 😔

That’s really low, what a snake @Tararararara