To not be sure how we never have any bloody money?!

[ThePinkGuitar]

I know lots of friends that earn the same or bit less that get to have holidays aboard, lots of days out beautiful home.
We are nearly at the end of renovating our house but no money to finish it off. Dh earns 40k plus does lots of side jobs so probably on average another £150 pm. I earn 28k (22.5 hours pro rota).
We have 2 children never have been able to take them on fancy trips. We don’t wear expensive clothes, no cosmetic costs (dye my own hair and use Rimmel make up lol).
We have an average car, pay 1k a month mortgage. We spend a lot of groceries.
But seriously where is all the money going I genuinely do not understand?!

@Lollypig

Feck off! Try living on the minimum wage!

Well said!

ALso try the Moneysaving Expert money makeover.

Systematically go through your budget with prompts to reduce utlities etc.

If its groceries that you're spending on, watch a few episodes of Eat Well for Less - they have people spending £200+ pw leaving no money for other things learning how to cut down.

Lollypig

Feck off! Try living on the minimum wage!

Presumably someone living off minimum wage is getting £1500 worth of housing benefit/council tax reduction/free prescriptions/free school meals/free childcare/working tax credits/child tax credits and child benefit.

But they always seem to forget about that. Plus, in order to £1500 in your pocket, you'd have to earn £1800, so it's really £1800 worth of free stuff.

OP - there are lots and lots of money guru's about at the moment

Dave Ramsey
Mamafurfur
The Female Money Doctor

just a few, there are dozens. Join their facebook pages and podcasts for tips and ideas But everybody has to start by looking at what they are spending on, which should show on your bank statement. Get your last 3 months bank statements and sit down and see where everything is going.

The PPs saying list all income and outgoings are right. I started doing it back in March and built up a record starting from January. I'm much more careful about money now because I dont want to have to record that I have frivolled money away on nothing.

I’ll tell you where it’s going

1- your previous debt (that’s a lot)
2- your food shop etc...
3-your mortgage isn’t particularly cheap either.

Our renovation cost us so much money, £100s here and £1000s there.

@StephenBelafonte

Lollypig

Feck off! Try living on the minimum wage!

Presumably someone living off minimum wage is getting £1500 worth of housing benefit/council tax reduction/free prescriptions/free school meals/free childcare/working tax credits/child tax credits and child benefit.

But they always seem to forget about that. Plus, in order to £1500 in your pocket, you'd have to earn £1800, so it's really £1800 worth of free stuff.

Not sure how being on minimum wages allows for £1500 worth of "free stuff". Please, if you know anyone like this, please send them my way for their tips and tricks..

No point trying to compare yourself with others as everyone has different income, outgoings and priorities.

Some people are great bargain hunters and just get more for their money than others who buy without looking for sales, discount codes, cashback etc.

Some people always look for deals in the supermarket, others just buy at full price.

Some people have a new mobile phone on a contract for £40+ pm, others buy a cheaper phone outright and have a sim only contract for less than a tenner a month.

Some people have full sky package, others just have Netflix.

Some people's holidays abroad will be done on a shoestring, cheap flights, airbnb, mostly eating in and days at the beach. Many UK holidays like Center Parcs or a 'cottage in Cornwall' will actually cost more.

Some people have help from relatives, are in even more debt than you, or have received an inheritence, you really don't know.

So what you need to do is make the most of your income and reduce your essential expenses as much as you can, to leave as much money as possible left so you have some available to afford whatever it is that you think you're currently missing out on.

@Hotelhelp

Our renovation cost us so much money, £100s here and £1000s there.

This, especially if it's to a high spec, Farrow and Ball Paint, John Lewis furniture and soft furnishings, designer kitchens.

You can do it all for a fraction of the cost by just using high street versions, Ikea, supermakets, DIY stores etc.

I'd say you pay a lot every month on your mortgage and have a lot of debt so that's where it goes.

Also, have you transferred your credit card debt to interest free deals?

If not, are you paying above the minimum? If not, you'll find that just about everything you pay goes on interest, hardly anything goes on the debt and you can plug away for years not getting very far, and paying loads of interest along the way.

Even if you can't transfer the balance, at the very least make sure you've stopped spending on the card, and are paying above the minimum. Plus don't let your payment drift down as the balance gets smaller. If the minimum payment is currently £180, set up a standing order for £200 and pay that amount at least every month.

You've answered your own question.

Although DH works full-time, you only work part-time.
You have a hefty mortgage.
You've been doing home renovations.
You have nearly 20k worth of debt to pay off.

Lots of people don't have debt, big mortgages or home renovations to fund, and they often have both adults working full-time.

Working part-time is a luxury for most people, as are expensive home renovations and having a 1k mortgage. If you choose all those things then you need to have a fairly decent income to support it AND have leftovers each month for things like savings, holidays etc.

Exactly what Barbaraofseville said! People have different priorities and spending habits and some people are amazing at budgeting. They may have family doing childcare for free or could have gotten their property cheaper etc. Best of luck op

Ps to all the really annoyed people on here hope your day/things pick up

If its groceries that you're spending on, watch a few episodes of Eat Well for Less - they have people spending £200+ pw leaving no money for other things learning how to cut down.

I cannot see how anyone can spend that much on food shopping..we spend 60 quid or so per week and seem to get loads!

The costs of the house renovations were from a different pot. We moved house and had 50k to do renovations some went onto other debts but not enough to clear all the debt.

What do you mean "a different pot?"

Could you actually afford this move? If you are servicing non mortgage debt that should have been your priority before splashing out on such a huge expense.

Not sure how being on minimum wages allows for £1500 worth of "free stuff". Please, if you know anyone like this, please send them my way for their tips and tricks..

Me too because if I was "entitled" to that much "free stuff" then I was underpaid my benefits for a few years and I could do with the back payment for Christmas.

I earn 40k and my wages covers all expenses for 2 adults, 2 children including rent, childcare and all utilities.

I had an 18k car loan (only 4 months left to pay) and that is 415 per month in repayments which is going to be a huge saving when its finally paid. Is your debt also being repaid at a similar rate?

I have started with a spreadsheet in the last few months which is helping me to see where I'm losing money. I plan everything ahead but also go back and check in to see where I've overspent. Also have a separate tab for Christmas so I dont buy too much or overspend.

I'm trying to cut my grocery bill down from 150 per week to 120 per week (by not buying too many non essentials) which will give me an extra 120 per month.

I also have savings that go out of my bank - 100per month for Christmas, 30 per week for a rainy day fund. Holidays are paid monthly in advance and this year I covered the kids birthdays by picking up overtime at work.

We dont live frugally but the spreadsheet is helping me to be more careful with my spending.

@ssd

Yawn. Another family on over 60k money about money. Mn at its finest.

This with bells on! So fucking tasteless isn’t it?

OP to answer your question you are are probably just shit with money.

Are you any good with excel, OP?
You can download transactions as a new workbook and then do some quick pivot tables on them to see where all your money is going.
Some banks have a spend analysis built in to their apps (Santander does)
I’m sure there are some you can download too but I wouldn’t know the best ones.

@VulvaPerson where do you shop? there is no one £60 a wk would be sufficient for me (2 adults, 2 under 7s).

What doesn't make sense is did you get the debt after the mortgage as I assumed lending was stricter so not sure how you borrowed so much.

Builders, renovations and debt interest hoover up money. You have to get yoursef in a position where your income is more than your spending so that you can attack the debt.

As others have said, you have to track the money. We use a combination of Microsoft Money, which is an obsolete program which Microsoft released for free when they stopped selling it, and excel for some of the fine detail. There are radical things that you may be able to do, like getting better paid jobs or selling the renovated house and banking a profit. In the short term, though, it comes down to pausing before you put something in the trolley or click the 'Buy' button or put the credit card into the machine and asking yourselves 'Do I really need this? Can I do without it altogether or can I get something cheaper that is going to do the job nearly as well?'

On paper we look to be quite comfortably off, but significant building work and the debt needed to finance it meant that we had to watch every penny for many years. The DC used to moan that their friends had this or that and they didn't, at which point we would remind them that they had each had a large bedroom of their own while their friends were sharing a small one.

In our case it was a calculated gamble. Our expectation was that we would never be able to pay the debts off until we either downsized once the DCs had left home or we inherited. As it happens, and unexpectedly, we were both able to land better paying jobs, which has helped a lot. But fundamentally we have done a lot of scrimping and saving for many years. Few holidays, lots of second-hand buying, hand-me-downs for the DCs (DWs family is huge and our DCs are at the young end), keep cars running as long as possible, main shop at Aldi, clothes from Asda, etc, etc.

If you give us a rough breakdown of all your outgoings and income we may be able to help more.

Your friends may earn more than you, have lower debts, have family providing childcare or may cover their expenses with loans and credit cards - don’t worry about what others are doing.

We go out loads but it’s mostly to National Trust gardens and houses - we pay an annual membership then we can go as much as we like- take a picnic and it’s a fab free day out for children. Keep theme parks or panto/theatre etc to an annual treat. Look for vouchers and deals for cinema trips and swimming sessions.

Try not to worry about what others get up to - you don’t know how they’re financing it.