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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Aibu? Are you really following lockdown rules?

490 replies

CoronaOneSoz · 08/11/2020 13:36

I work and kids are at school but I've been following the lockdown rules. Not met anyone. I know I could bubble up as I'm a single parent. Anyway i spoke to my sister and parents today and they have all met up together. Sister has 2 kids and a husband, the kids go to school and they both work. My parents are still relatively young and work, no health issues. They also still have my other sister at home who also works. I was abit shocked but they just laughed and said they don't care they will still meet up. I'm not pissed off I'm more disappointed with them. Aibu for feeling like that? Just been told I need to lighten up as i told them they are breaking the rules.

OP posts:
MarieIVanArkleStinks · 08/11/2020 15:37

PPs are commenting that the people in their immediate vicinity appear to be complying. I couldn't tell you what my neighbours were doing at gunpoint, and care less. The only one thing I do know is that I shall not be reporting anyone. A PP wrote:

I think everyone needs to stop concerning themselves with what everyone else is doing.

I am with you 100%. I also believe we would be in a far better place if we did this, COVID or no COVID.

Chocolateandamaretto · 08/11/2020 15:38

Yes to following the rules but my life hasn’t really changed with lockdown - I work in a school, DH works from home, kids go to school. We weren’t really seeing anyone anyway as a family of 5 so not like we could have parents or family friends round in the rule of 6. Can still go for walks etc. Don’t really do the pub much. So I am following the rules but I’m not going to pretend I’m doing so at great hardship and I empathise with people who are breaking rules who are in tougher situations than me.

Mixedupworld · 08/11/2020 15:39

I'm high risk. Shielded since about 2 weeks before we actually went into lockdown. I'm in the north east. I've barely seen another human being in real life since mid march. It's the hardest thing ever but I would do the same time again if it means I will live. I've cheated death once before, I'm not prepared to risk it again. If only every single person did what we have been told to do then this shit will be over with sooner.

UnicornAndSparkles · 08/11/2020 15:39

I think I'm following the rules. The only thing im unsure about is childcare with DD. She's 3 and my parents look after her on a Wednesday morning whilst I work. They pick her up from my house and then I collect her from theirs. They're our childcare bubble. Am I allowed into their house upon collection of DD to say use the bathroom? I'm pregnant and when I need the loo I need the loo! Socially distanced etc.

Icequeen01 · 08/11/2020 15:40

Yes we are following the rules here. We are a support bubble for my 80 year old mum who lives on her own but this worries me as both DH and I work in schools and DS has a part time job in Tesco. I never feel comfortable about our support bubble as we have so much contact with the outside world. However, my mum would literally give up if she self isolated completely like the first lockdown.

Toothsil · 08/11/2020 15:43

We've been following them. They're there for a reason. You are right, your sister and parents are wrong.

As an aside, I wonder who invented the phrase "bubble up/bubbling up". It's awful!

TheDowagerDuchess · 08/11/2020 15:43

I have been. Except when I took DS to the park after school. He saw some school friends in his class and was playing with them (which I think is allowed) but I unthinkingly started talking in a group to more than one Mum. Only occurred when i got home that this was against the rules as I just did it on automatic pilot.

Park is on our walk home from school so had just drifted there in the first place.

Otherwise yes.

Winterfairy23 · 08/11/2020 15:45

I am following the rules, but I'm tempted to break them sometimes.

I'm mid separation and my ex lives here half of the week. The other half of the week he's away elsewhere with at least 2 other households in aware of. He's also in a public facing job.

I work from home and haven't seen my family for 2 weeks because the weather has been miserable. I don't have a car either so I'm reluctant to use public transport.

The problem I have is the rest of my family aren't following the rules so I don't want to bubble with them. I won't be spending Christmas alone regardless of what the rules are at that time.

HostaFireAndIce · 08/11/2020 15:46

We are, pretty much, but it isn’t very difficult for us. We are in a bubble with my mum who lives locally and is on her own, but all other family lives far enough away that we don’t see them from one month to the next anyway. I am meeting friends for walks outside. We’re teachers so we’re still at work. The only way in which we aren’t is that DS1’s best friend lives on our road And we are allowing him in our house, but they spend all day at school together anyway. It seems silly to make them walk the streets while they chat about Minecraft...

MummaBear4321 · 08/11/2020 15:46

We have followed the rules so far, but mainly just because I had a baby last week so we have just stayed at home. We havent had any visitors yet and we have used lockdown as an excuse to just have things to ourselves which we have loved. We will probably break the rules and have my PIL over next week to meet the baby, so we will break the rules. My parents live abroad and plan to come over when lockdown is done. TBH, with shops open, playgrounds open, places to go for a walk, the ability for one person to meet outside another adult with preschool kids, some cafes still open in parks, dont see what rule I would need to break. It's so lax. Its not really a lockdown is it? Or maybe I have just become very anti social lol.

bengalcat · 08/11/2020 15:47

Yes but tbh it hasn't been difficult for me and I've barely noticed any changes . Both sets of parents for DP and myself died long ago . Only meet cousins , aunts , uncles etc at weddings,funerals etc and there haven't been any . DD away at University year 2 and would only come home for the holidays . I work FT for the NHS so have carried on going to work as usual throughout the pandemic .
We've been to restaurants and cinema when allowed and stuck to the guidelines re numbers etc . Dog goes out for her walk chasing squirrels in Hyde Park as usual . Supermarkets have always been open and any bathroom luxuries I click and collect from our local mini Waitrose . I trim DP's hair and he does a good job of my roots . Yes the gym has closed doors again but it did and is doing livestream and catch up classes , did C25K and now discovered Pineapple dance studios online classes so quite happy at present .
Wear a mask all day at work , unless I'm in my office alone , so wearing one outdoors / on public transport when I use it / supermarket etc is no great challenge .

I appreciate others have had a more stressful time and differnet demands to negotiate .

LouLou789 · 08/11/2020 15:48

Yes we are following them. However, if we are still in lockdown just before Christmas we will make one trip to drop all Christmas stuff off for the grandkids (four families) just on the doorstep and say hello while standing at the garden gate, and strictly speaking that’s “not allowed” as it’s a private garden.

Ihatesandwiches · 08/11/2020 15:51

We're following the rules. The closest I'll get to breaking them is going for a walk with a friend with a dog. Both our junior school age children will come too. As adults we will socially distance. As kids, they won't come near us and play together. The children sit together at school so I don't think a 45 minute romp in the woods will make much of a difference!

BlackLambAndGreyFalcoln · 08/11/2020 15:52

Yes absolutely! DD is in school and DH and I are WFH and have been since March. We actually haven't had anyone into our house since March (aside from service people) because although it was allowed from July (until we went into tier 2 that was) due to the layout of our house it would be difficult to have other people in our house and to remain socially distanced unless we were in different rooms (one person around for a coffee would be fine, but we couldn't have another family over and guarantee that we'd be able to keep social distancing from everyone outside our household). Similarly we haven't been to a pub or a restaurant with other people because although it was allowed (again until we went into tier 2) it was very difficult to guarantee that we'd be able to keep social distance around a table. When lockdown is over we still won't do either of those things (assuming the tier restrictions allow for them) until we are allowed to do so without social distancing. We've seen plenty of friends and family since July (until this lockdown) but we've always kept it to an outdoor setting (with social distancing) as it's much safer for everyone.

1990shopefulftm · 08/11/2020 15:57

I am, followed them without fail throughout my pregnancy (haven't stepped foot anywhere which isn't a hospital or the GP since march or seen family or friends in person).

I spent over a day of which in early labour but couldnt leave hospital as I had to be monitored due to my waters having gone and I developed high blood pressure, but as I wasn't 4cm yet I was alone overnight in a lot of pain and was very distressed because of it.

Going through what I did alone and being with other mums being induced who were in pain without support really has made me feel the months of following the rules worth it as it could have been even worse, if it means another mum doesn't have to suffer like I did then once baby and I are home we will happily stick to him meeting everyone by video call only for a while.

lljkk · 08/11/2020 15:57

Gave a hug to lovely friend I bumped into beach. Her partner handed me a fossil he found. So we all had 2 minutes of sincerely forgetting to be Lockdown Obedients. Trying my very best is still a total Failure. I'm not willing to live in obsessive fear tbh.

WildOrchids67 · 08/11/2020 15:59

I'm following for the most part. I'm in Scotland in a level 3 area, working from home, wearing a face covering etc.
However, I live alone, no family nearby and I've really missed my friends. Three times since March, a few months apart each time, I've been round to a friend's flat where there were a few others visiting as well, a few different households but no more than about 6 there at once.
Those are the only times I've really broken the rules, but they were all good nights with good company and I'd have gone crazy long ago without them.

DDiva · 08/11/2020 16:01

We are in the south.

We are staying home as much as possible. I did however meet 1 friend with her kids in the park (2 are in the same class). I have also chatted to.another parent in the park. I see this as low risk as distanced and outside.

We haven't seen my parents this weekend, we may see them in a week or two.

It really doesn't feel like a lock down. Most shops are open, loads doing click and collect/takeaway. Most people doing nonessential journeys. I cant work from home, dd is going to school......

LesLavandes · 08/11/2020 16:01

Yes I am and if everyone would, we might be in a better place. Shame on some of you. Ugh

HumanFemale1 · 08/11/2020 16:02

Nope. Following my own common sense instead, you should try it op

NerrSnerr · 08/11/2020 16:04

I'm following the rules. I work with local care homes and the numbers of residents with positive tests are creeping up again. It's an awful way to die and I want to do my bit not to add to the amount of deaths.

rarotonga2 · 08/11/2020 16:04

We are following the rules Smile

emmcan · 08/11/2020 16:05

Nope.

All neighbours had weekend parties.
Local police chief has said lockdown unenforcable.

Groups of kids doing kid stuff.

No lockdown here really.

GreenShadow · 08/11/2020 16:05

Yes, but it's not difficult for us. I'm working from home, DH is working on a construction site, therefore permitted. No local family. All friends also seem to be following it so I will have the odd country walk with single friends, but that will be it.

It's even my birthday tomorrow and still planning to obey the rules (take away and Zoom family 'party')

Dartsplayer · 08/11/2020 16:05

My friend's Dsis is a rule breaker. She was due an op on Friday so took a test on Wednesday and was told to self-isolate until the op. Took her DC out of school and then - despite beauty being shut down from Thursday - gave her last client a massage on Thursday whilst self-isolating. Had the op on Friday as planned. Got a phone call yesterday from Track & Trace to say that her massage client has tested positive and she needs to self-isolate for 14 days. She hasn't even informed the hospital and has potentially infected doctors, nurses and patients whilst she was in. It sickens me. So whilst you're all moaning about no appointments taking place at hospitals etc, it's all because of people like her who don't give a stuff about anyone and the poor NHS staff either being poorly or having to self isolate