To insist your child chooses a certain lunch option?

[Kelzbelz87]

Just curious really! Not saying either is wrong.
My children have 3 lunch options at school, a meat option, a veggie option and a jacket potato. Each morning the teacher tells them the options and the pick which one they like. I talk to a mum at the school and she was saying she insists her daughter chooses a certain option each day, whether she says she likes it or doesn’t, and mum gets cross if she picks something different to what she’s been told!
What does everyone else do? :)

It’s one of the few areas kids can have some autonomy, so without a specific reason, I don’t think it’s a good idea to limit school meal choices.

She's bonkers and controlling.

That is something that should be entirely the kids choice.

Thank you guys for your replies! I did think it was a bit odd but just wanted other opinions! :)

It would mean I did not have to find something my DS would like, he could pick what he likes! but going by this forum it would be perfectly normal and I am surprised the mum did not provide the school with a menu that they could cook for her child

I remember when I was in school (going back a few years now lol!) I used to always choose my own lunch and I would be so excited all morning. Nothing quite like looking forward to a nice meal!

when i went to school, there was no option, one meal for everyone, and it could not be declined, and had to be finished.
no packed lunches either.
though could go home for lunch, but most mothers would not have that.

Assuming all options are reasonably healthy I think this person needs to pick her battles.

If they're a vegetarian family, maybe.

Is it because of dietary choices? E.g. she is raising them vegetarian?

I can't see any other reason why she'd bother intervening. Did she say why she does it?

My mother forced me to do things her way. It was awful and I have never forgotten

Isn't it up to the child what they eat when they are away from home? would the child want to actually be vegetarian?

Sure us parents have to feed our kids at home but at school it should be up to the child what they eat

I don’t know if she’s raising her to be vegetarian actually! She didn’t say! Although if that is the case I don’t understand why she couldn’t choose the veg option OR a jacket potato which is also vegetarian?

I go as far to check what he had each day and if it looks like hes going to have the same thing every single day (they have a sandwich option and he likes ham sandwiches) then ill nudge him over onto literally anythibg else.

@yorkshirepudddiing

She's bonkers and controlling.

That is something that should be entirely the kids choice.

That.

Does she insist on the same section every day ie the veggie option then no not unreasonable if their veggie family and she’s worried that the daughter will choose meat.

I think there needs to be some clarification does she look at the menu and choose for her daughter? In which case is it because she’s choosing what the daughter likes, is the daughter a fussy eater and likely to choose what all her mates are having regardless of wether she likes it and then not eat it so not getting lunch.
In this case I’m not again sure she’s being unreasonable.

Or is she choosing what she perceives as the healthiest option based on no wheat/carbs/organic/no sugar because the child is “banned” from eating them? Then yeah it is a bit weird and controlling.

She might also be doing it so that the family meal fits with lunch so say their having salmon pasta for dinner she doesn’t want her daughter having fish or pasta for lunch so if the baked potato is tuna and the veggie option is veggie lasagne then it might be the mum to have the chicken and veg from the meat option. Although I sort of understand that, it’s a bit controlling.

The baked potato might not be veggie though tuna isn’t vegetarian, neither is something like chicken and sweet corn,

Yes if it’s cheese/coleslaw/plain it’s veggie but there’s a few fillings that aren’t veggie

Rizzle drizzle thank you! All very valid points I hadn’t considered! :) as far as I can see from looking at the menu the only jacket potato options are cheese or beans!

She shouldn’t be forcing her child to grow up vegetarian. She should be feeding her a balanced diet, and then when she’s an adult if she wants to restrict her food intake then she gets to make that choice herself.

It really is awful when parents try to bring up child vegetarian/vegan.

My daughter choses for herself. It allows her to have some autonomy in her life. Even as a vegetarian personally, it's my daughter's choice what she wants to eat, including meat.

One day her daughter will rebel and choose something against her mother’s wishes, and then if her mother creates about it, she will learn to lie. It might not be about school lunches, but if her mum is as controlling as this in one area, she’s probably the same in others. A dangerous path to take, I think.

I imagine she is vegetarian or has a dietary issue. Not sure why you're so bothered though.

I'm vegetarian, but would not be interested in my sons choosing what they wanted as long as it was not just cake or something silly!

Maybe they are vegetarian. Maybe the parent has meal planned and the other option is what they will be having at home that night and she doesn't want her child to eat the same thing for 2 meals in a day.

Thank you everyone for your replies! I thought maybe I was being too relaxed! Everyone parents differently though :)

Maybe the kid has allergies.