About DH loud eating and drinking

[goteam]

I don't know if the lockdowns are getting to me. DH's loud eating and drinking is really getting to me. He eats snacks (crisps, nuts) every evening and I'm sick of the constant loud crunching. Every drink is swilled loudly around his mouth before swallowing. It used to just be wine he did this with but it's tea now too. Any drink. It's infuriating. Does this kind of thing bother anybody else? I have always been sensitive to loud eating so not sure it's just me.

Okay - I need help!

I'm the one who apparently eats loudly. DP occasionally snaps at me when I'm eating cereal and tells me I'm crunching loudly, but my mouth is always closed! Honestly I find it upsetting when he snaps about this and it ruins whatever I'm eating. Our relationship is great, and snapping is totally out of character for him.

Interested to have advice from those on the other side!

This thread has made me feel queasy.

Mine eats biscuits in bed last thing at night. Obviously this is disgusting for many reasons, and it makes me want to put the pillow over his head.

@ISpeakBecauseICan

Eating noises make my blood boil, I have to leave the room. Sniffing also fills me with rage

Oh gods, the sniffing! It would be justifiable homicide, right?

Oh God my DH does this. And he moans that I’m always having a go at him but what he doesn’t realise is that 80% of the time he eats I’m biting my own tongue so as not to scream SHUT THE FUCK UP at him. He has no idea how much I want to moan at him but don’t out of concern for his feelings. He swills fizzy pop around his mouth like it’s feckin mouthwash before he swallows it. Makes me so angry I have so many thoughts of physically harming him to just make him stop. I have to have the tv on while he eats or I’ll kill him.

I know I’m not perfect and I know it must be awful someone glaring at you whenever you eat and I do sometimes worry he’ll get so sick of it might really damage our relationship but I just can’t deal with it.

I've always hated it too. My ex didn't have bad manners and his mouth was closed when eating, but I could hear this gross wet chomping. Urgh.

And the heavy intake of breath as he puts food in his mouth, it’s like he’s trying to inhale it, it’s like feeding time at the feckin zoo.

I don’t mind people eating but when everyone has gone to bed and I’m just chilling with some tv, dh eating his daily apple then drives me mad.
It’s a combination of loud crunching and loud slurping at the juice.
I told him he eats like a slobbering animal
He stays in the kitchen now.

My DH is the same. Weekends are worse when he is having a beer, he is up peeing every 2 fucking minutes whilst I am trying watch a film. Then its sniff, sniff, sneeze, cough! arrgh

I tell him to be quiet and shut the Fuck up, EVERY time he does it, I just long to watch a film all the way though without having to pause/rewind it all the time, takes me about 4 hours to watch 1 film

I have to have background noise during meals. TV, radio, anything!

I'm with you OP. I can't stand it either. I dream of living alone sometimes.

@Directionerforever, God I feel you here. Genuinely think its irreversibly damaging my relationship as well. I haven't sat near my husband eating for a long time, I find him physically repulsive when he does.

I actually had to stop being ice lollies over summer, because not only was he slurping and somehow crunching them like crisps, he was also fellating them. Proper deep fucking throating. The embarrament was unreal, yet apparently cheek-fucking your Solero is totally normal and I'm unreasonable .

Ugh, the swilling drinks in mouth thing would end me. I can't bear. Likewise anyone who glugs loudly in their throat when they swallow.

I don't mind loud eating at lunchtimes as much but still think all eating and drinking should be as quiet as possible. It's more evenings when I'm trying to relax being punctuated by the crunching of crisps and swilling of drinks. I have gently suggested that we make sure we (he) eats a big enough dinner so not to need evening snacks. I'm on edge during my only down time...

I have found my people.

DH drinks pints of squash. For every sip he tips his head back, opens his mouth really wide like some kind of demented carp and pours liquid in. Only it's so much liquid he can't swallow it in one go, so each mouth full is 2 incredibly loud swallows. Followed by a burp.

If I ever end up killing him, this will be why.

I can't believe my DH clearly has so many other wives .

@BrumBoo it’s so difficult isn’t it. I try and repress the anger as much as possible but then sometimes inevitably it erupts. And he just doesn’t hear it. He doesn’t see why it’s such a problem. And he’s so laid back that I can’t come up with something that I know winds him up to compare it to so that he does get it because there isn’t anything!

I leave the room when dh does that...makes me want to throw crockery across the room so better just to leave

Tell him he needs to eat and drink where you can't hear him. If he wants to have eating habits of a pig he can do so, out of earshot.

This is such a funny thread! My dh manages to be noisy eating mashed potato wtaf????!??? 😂😂

@goteam Unbelievable. I don't get why they don't realise they're doing it. I've asked my fella once 'Aren't you supposed to eat food, not excavate it?' and he just carried on. He also does the gulp of air before eating thing that @Directionerforever has mentioned, then he complains he farts so much. They just don't think. Like I have just spent the past 3 hours gutting the entire house and he's been in bed ill. I started downstairs first and got it smelling wonderful and fresh, come up to do the bathroom and bedrooms and he's gone downstairs, let rice boil over all on top of the stove, bust out a can of tuna and sat eating it. DING DING DING DING! I go down to get a clean cloth and he starts spraying the air because he's decided to fill the living room with farts. They love taking up as much space as possible, whether it's by sound or smell, apparently

Yanbu. I fucking hate this and have to leave the room.

Did these men eat that way when you first met them? If so, why didn't you dump them at the first slurp or crunch? If they didn't, how on earth did they become such disgusting pigs and over what time period?

I can’t remember. I met him when he was 18. If he did it probably didn’t bother me.

He’s eating next to me right now, it’s the mouth breathing during mouthfuls, like he can’t breath through his nose with his mouth full. It’s incredible.

Dh never ate like this when we first started living together...I don't know what happened. I find it hideous. Honestly, it's like he has a microphone in his mouth amplifying everything.

Ive been on the other side of this and trust me its not funny. My exdh used to glare at me constantly when i was eating. He used to call me a disgusting pig and shout at me. I had a proper craving for raw carrots when i was pregnant, but i wasnt allowed to eat them if he was in the house( not even in another room). Eating is a natural, pleasureable thing and making someone feel like a monster whos ruining your life for doing that is horrible and abusive. I ended up with a real food phobia and couldnt eat in front of other people for years- i still feel self- concious about it now.
Remember the problem is with you- not the person eating. Be kind, leave the room( nicely)if you must or get some therapy, but please please dont make the other person feel awful for eating