About DH loud eating and drinking

[goteam]

I don't know if the lockdowns are getting to me. DH's loud eating and drinking is really getting to me. He eats snacks (crisps, nuts) every evening and I'm sick of the constant loud crunching. Every drink is swilled loudly around his mouth before swallowing. It used to just be wine he did this with but it's tea now too. Any drink. It's infuriating. Does this kind of thing bother anybody else? I have always been sensitive to loud eating so not sure it's just me.

It’s not just you. My dh is the same.

A horrific new habit is sucking all five fingers loudly if there’s anything that you’d eat with your fingers. I pointed out to him that he’d sucked the five fingers on his hands TWELVE TIMES while eating a bowl of chilli and rice that I’d served with tortilla chips and dip. Twelve. He looked at me like I’m insane because I counted.

I now don’t serve naan bread with curry, garlic bread with pasta, tortilla chips, spare ribs (don’t even....) toast is on a sticky wicket.....

Eating noises are bad but drinking noises...

Particularly the shlurp noises people make with hot drinks.

Why are you sucking? Why don't you just wait till it's not scalding hot and just pour it into your mouth?

My DH has been breathing too loudly lately. I might just be a bit too pregnant now though

Just after the beginning of lockdown in March, I noticed my partner makes a voiceless shloop sound as he inhales his food. I can't unhear it now.

See also: can't sneeze without a battle cry, can't blow his nose without a car-horn sound; farts like watermelons being hurled viciously onto the floor of a car park.

At the end of the day, when the house is perfectly still and quiet, and I'm reading, he cracks his finger joints. Not all in one go, but with long, poignant pauses between each pop.

We re-did our patio in April. I suppose I could dress him in black plastic and put him outside on bins night. He sleeps through anything.

Yes but I have Misophonia and I swear if DP fills his bastard drink like a fish anymore he will be wearing it. MF.

Gulps*

The rule in my house is the tv or radio has to be on before he starts eating. I wind my fiancé up about constant heavy breathing and grunting. But it is annoying

It's great to belong 😂

I generally tell DP that if he doesn't stop chewing like a beast I'll ram a knife through him. He shuts up usually.

(For clarification I wouldn't, it just gets my rage across and he knows this. He doesn't actually feel threatened)

Although my jaw clicks which DP finds annoying so it's tit for tat

Although DP does actually eat very politely I just hate the sounds of anyone eating

Oh God, I'm dying here😃😃

DP makes a hideous gushing, churning noise when he eats - it reminds me of a dishwasher entering the rinse cycle. I shudder to think how much saliva he produces just to break down one small biscuit. Everything is masticated into pure liquid, rendering his digestive juices completely redundant.

Why is it always the men though?!! Also how have they got to adulthood and managed to keep up with this behaviour? Yanbu eating sounds are awful.

I honestly told my husband if he didn’t stop eating with his mouth open our relationship wouldn’t continue. This was early in our relationship but long enough in that I felt I could be honest.

He did make an effort and hasn’t been like that for years - unfortunately it’s very obvious where the habit came from, I feel murderous when his dad visits! I didn’t know it was possibly to make such a noise when drinking a cup of tea!

No one is allowed to eat prawn crackers with takeaway in our house, the crunching makes we want to scream

I have always had this issue since being a teenager, it drives me crazy !!! The suggestion for chewing at the same time to cover up their noise works sometimes - failing that I turn up the TV or eat alone!

I say to my husband

‘“ darling , I love you dearly but if you don’t stop making such a racket eating I’m going to have to kill you “

I know this is about annoying 'quiet' sounds but this makes me think about how I feel when I hear my other half in the loo (he never closes the door - and still does this when we have company so they will hear it too.)

He spits, pees then trumps - in that order. It makes me cringe and retch. AND he always leaves drips on the seat (and floor). AND he denies that he's the one who leaves drips. (SCREAM)

I could SMOTHER him whilst he's asleep. (Another SCREAM.)

Oh - and .... when he's really relaxed he sounds like he's snoring but he's still awake!? Christ I spend most of my life screaming inwardly.

So glad it is not just mine.
I don't ever remember him doing this when we first met.
Closed mouth Chew, chew, open mouth slop, slop, closed mouth chew chew, loud swallow, belch.
Breathes through mouth
Inbetween mouth breathing and slurping he is chewing away at his nails, mining his ears or nose, farting and generally being fecking gross.
I have already hollowed out space underneath the toilet bowl so eventually, due to excess missed piss he will fall through never to be seen again.

I’ve just been reading these out to my daughter and we are sitting here in tears laughing! I know it’s a serious problem and I shouldn’t find it funny but the way these posts are written is genius! Please keep going!

Lol. My ex husband got up very early and would make himself a cup of green tea, natural yogurt and an apple. He brought it to bed, beside sleeping wife. Slurp slurp and omg, crunch crunch at 5.30 am.

Hmmm. We're divorced

This thread is absolutely superb! Your posts have made my day, not laughed this hard for yonks x

OP, when he is doing this just ask him "enjoying that?", when he says yes, just say "me too, with all the noise you are making!".

May well be confrontational, but so what? Noisy eaters and drinkers grip my shit, there is no need for it.

My ex used to scrape the fork along his teeth with every noisy slurpy bite, made me wretch 🤢