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Original poster

Is this year the worst year of your life?

744 replies

AbsentmindedWoman · 03/11/2020 21:17

It's a shit year, I think virtually everyone would agree. But is it the worst you have lived through?

I'm bored, frustrated, and because I am chronically ill and depend heavily on access to specialist doctors for time-sensitive treatments, have a constant level of background anxiety in case SHTF and my doctors are forced to cancel. However, for me it's not the worst period of my life to date.

What about you? I'm interested in different perspectives on this, as we all are coming to the situation from very different places.

OP posts:
CeibaTree · 04/11/2020 09:50

2019 was worse for me due to the sudden death of my beloved dad and 2 miscarriages. 2020 has actually be fine, I got to spend lots of extra time with DH and the DC during lockdown and we are lucky in that we had a comfortable home in which to do so, no job security worries, and the DC are too young to have to be homeschooled in any serious way.

Echobelly · 04/11/2020 09:52

I think the thing about really horrible years is that they feel so unfair on oneself, specifically. Everyone else seems to be getting on with their lives, and yours seems to be going to shit. In 2014, I spent a lot of time thinking 'I want just one thing to go right, just one thing!' NB, when I let go of that thought and accepted life is unfair, I actually started feeling much better and in really 2015 things did improve.

So this year is not the same in that pretty much everyone is affected and having a crappy time, so that does take the edge of feeling as though fate is dealing you a uniquely crappy deal.

Nahmfor · 04/11/2020 09:53

Theoretically yes.

January - my 4 month old baby was hospitalised for being severely underweight due to issues breastfeeding. Zero support from anyone, horrific time.

Lockdown happened, I gained a stone from being on mat leave and being petrified to leave the house and making too many cheesecakes.

May - after 4 years trying and two rounds of ivf to have my son, we randomly fell pregnant (we were not trying, absolute fluke tbh) I then miscarried the day my DH's grandad died, which was also his first Father's Day. So grim.

But so many lovely things have actually happened. I made a lot of healthy positive changes (otherwise I was falling into a deep depression) spending all that time together with my son in the house during lockdown was great for our bond.

I started university on a whim after my job decided to demote me on return from mat leave because, obviously having a baby must mean I can't remember how to do my role or work full time? Hmmm..

I look at my miscarriage in such a way that, at least we got there. We got pregnant "by ourselves". I still ache for that baby, but it's getting easier.

I've hated this year but I've not let it consume me, like I probably would've done if it all happened a few years earlier.

freddosfrogs · 04/11/2020 09:53

It's probably one of several contenders, though it's probably the 12 months when most things have gone wrong, covid and non covid.

Hickorydickoryspock · 04/11/2020 09:57

Oh no. Not even close. I was homeless and addicted to speed in my early twenties. I had serious mental health issues. I was also in an incredibly abusive relationship where my partner tried to cut open my throat with a kitchen utensil.

This year has been hard because of the sense its worldwide. That everyone is having a tough time not just me. I'm worried about all my friends and family.
But on a personal level altho I'm obviously anxious about the health of my husband and children and friends, this has been one of the best years of my life all in all. I've got two beautiful children, im happily married, I just managed to buy my first house, my mental health problems are under control at the moment... I didnt expect to live into my 30s tbh if you'd told me this id not have believed you.
So its a strange situation for me right now.

Sarahandco · 04/11/2020 09:57

No - not at all. Thank you, that is a good way to look at things.

MaddeningtheUnhelpful · 04/11/2020 09:59

No this year has been ok. Worst year of my life would be 2011 with two very small children, fleeing domestic violence, trying to navigate the court system, ss demanding that I facilitate contact for abusive father and being very heavy handed with threats, my child being very very ill with croupe and a family member getting a terminal diagnosis.
This year has been boring but I have a secure home, 3 amazing children, a loving husband. We've been incredibly lucky in my husbands profession so haven't had any financial worries (touch wood)

Feellikefrighteningyeah · 04/11/2020 09:59

No the worst year was when my dad died and two years previous to that when I was catching 6 buses a day , 3 times a week to visit him

Zenithbear · 04/11/2020 10:01

No it isn't. It's been frustrating because we have a lot of friends and good social life. We also normally have loads of holidays etc. Something going on every weekend.
A couple of really horrible things happened but also a couple of really exciting things happened so that's equal.
I've really enjoyed being with dp. During the first lock down we had a lovely time. We joked that we were practising for retirement (in two years 🤞)

Arosadra · 04/11/2020 10:02

No, not by a long chalk. 2020 hasn’t been particularly bad for me, I’m fortunate. And also have had some shocking years prior to that.

Scottishskifun · 04/11/2020 10:04

Nope not the worst year at all we are very fortunate to now both be employed in the public sector and our jobs are safe. Our worst year was 6 years ago where my husband went through 3 redundancies in a year due to the 2014 oil crash and I also went through a redundancy round the stress of that was far worse but I know that's what a lot has people are now going through.

I have found this year a continued level of concern however for family members as both sets of parents are high risk and my husbands grandparents are in their 90s now.

TheoriginalLEM · 04/11/2020 10:09

Its been a difficult year for me, exacerbated by covid. My mum has gone into care home after extended hospital stay and she had surgery yesterday i was able to see her for 5 minutes on monday thanks to the kindness of the ward staff. Its all been very rubbish with mum regardless of covid.

Work is tough but managable and there have been delays to my qualifications as well.

Furlough was fucking fantastic for me although i hope it doesnt happen again.
I enjoyed lockdown 1 and will be pretty much unaffected by lockdown 2 i hope.

So not the worst year by a very long way but i can see how it might be for others, especially those affected by the virus directly.

Persipan · 04/11/2020 10:12

I had a baby, after spending five years (and an eye-watering amount of money) trying. So, no!

CeibaTree · 04/11/2020 10:15

@Persipan

I had a baby, after spending five years (and an eye-watering amount of money) trying. So, no!
Aww congratulations! :)
freddosfrogs · 04/11/2020 10:21

@Persipan

I had a baby, after spending five years (and an eye-watering amount of money) trying. So, no!
Best news all year Thanks
trappedsincesundaymorn · 04/11/2020 10:21

I lost Mum in March and Dad on Sunday, so yes, this year is the worst year of my life.

freddosfrogs · 04/11/2020 10:21

@trappedsincesundaymorn

I lost Mum in March and Dad on Sunday, so yes, this year is the worst year of my life.
Thanks
SedentaryCat · 04/11/2020 10:24

Not the worst year. That was 2018, closely followed by 2019.

This year has been much easier in comparison.

DynamoKev · 04/11/2020 10:26

No. Government rule changes and Covid shut down my micro business but I have been lucky to get a job.

Really sorry for people who have suffered this year but it certainly hasn't been my worst (yet).

WhereamI88 · 04/11/2020 10:27

No, it's been boring and frustrating but I'm in a good relationship, stable income, family is OK (even though I haven't seen them in almost a year...). I get depressed and have ups and downs but I've had a lot worse years.

Mustbe3ormorecharacters · 04/11/2020 10:45

Not even close.....yet.

PontiacBandit · 04/11/2020 10:50

No, its not been easy for sure but it has had it's positives.

I still have a job, got a pay rise a few months back but I've worked solidly since Jan (bar 2 weeks off) as well as studying and homeschooling 2 kids. I'm exhausted but glad I'm still working. I love working from home, my life balance is much better.

I'm having a bit of a health kick and pamper (just pretending I'm in a health spa but I'm at home) so that when I see people again, I'm looking fabulous.

HappydaysArehere · 04/11/2020 10:57

No, it’s been frustrating and worrying but nowhere as stressful as times in the past.

AriesTheRam · 04/11/2020 11:00

No.the worst year so far was 2012 when I left ex H and was in a very unsettled state.

RagamuffinAndFidget · 04/11/2020 11:17

No. My youngest child died last year, and then I fell pregnant with twins, but miscarried at nine weeks. 2020 has been awful but it would have been anyway to be honest.

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