To not want to give my dinner to the dog

[Zumarocks]

Lost it with DH today and would like to know everyone's thoughts on this totally unimportant issue! Every time I cook something that could potentially have leftovers for the dog, my DH will intervene before I have 'too much' or seconds because 'the dog could have that!'. At least 3 or 4 times now I have stated that I cooked it, and if I want to eat it I will. Then comes a chorus of 'poor doggie....mummy ate your dinner....' etc. Any time I go out anywhere, I always, without fail, sort out food for everyone before I go. Today I went for a haircut. Made a shepherds pie for everyone before I went. Got back to leftovers. Was starving so just took the dish out of the oven and started eating. DH comes in, 'oh are you just eating it straight out of there!' 'Yes, yes I am, because I'm starving'! I laughed. ' Oh I thought the dog could have some of that!' he said. 'I said not likely, I'm really hungry!' He then said 'but there was loads in there!!'. At this point I lost my shit. I had literally had 2 mouthfuls OF THE DINNER I COOKED. In a totally melodramatic gesture I put the whole lot in the dog's bowl so it was overflowing, whilst shouting that he had zero respect for me and that I am totally at the bottom of the pile. Everyone else gets to eat their dinner no problem, but if I have the audacity to eat THE THING I BLOODY COOKED I get told it's not fair on the dog. FFS. I said when he starts cooking he will get to bloody well decide what the dog gets. And breathe.

Stop cooking for him.
From now on, he can sort his own dinner, and the dog's.

He's a dickhead.

Have you cancelled the onion cheque?

YANBU, I would plate yours and rest of your families up then leave what left for your OH to decide whether he wants to share his portion with the dog.

Cook a nice meal and put DH portion in the dogs bowl. Do it in front of him and see how he likes it. I would buy the dog tins of meat to eat along with the dry food. My 2 dogs have meat morning and dry food in evening.

He's the one who sounds unhinged. I'd not even want to eat with him much less cook for him. What an absolute idiot.

I don't think it's about the dog at all (unless he actually needs mental health help )

I think he's policing what YOU eat - some sexist shit maybe like 'women should eat small portions' or ' if women eat they're greedy/fat'

Either way tell him to GET TO FUCK

He needs to start cooking.

He needs to stop policing what you eat.

You need to cancel the onions.

Ha! YANBU OP, your DH is being a knob (as are many of these posters incidentally).

I had absolutely no idea onions were toxic to dogs! I hate onions myself so rarely have them in our dinners but have definitely given the dog some at some stage . In fact I gave him some leftover meatballs last week that I had put onion in... aghhh what happens when they eat onions? Off to google how I've been killing my poor pooch.

SO glad we don't have a dog and never will!

@donquixotedelamancha

Then comes a chorus of 'poor doggie....mummy ate your dinner....' etc. No onions because they upset DH! Any time I go out anywhere, I always, without fail, sort out food for everyone before I go.

This thread is really confusing.

@Zumarocks. On MN, DH means darling husband. I'm not clear whether you are using DH for your young child or an adult with additional needs that you care for? Both can be very stressful but YWBU to shout at him- he doesn't know any better. Do you have a partner who can perhaps pick up some slack for a while?

I don't understand why you are eating the kiddie meals. Just make yourself a real shepherd's pie while you make him the flavourless mush. You aren't letting DH use the oven are you?

Even though the kiddie food contains no onion, garlic (and presumably salt or spice) it is still not great for the dog. I know kids(?) can be really persistent but you need to teach him to look after the dog properly. He obviously needs firmer boundaries but try to distract him so it doesn't become a battle.

Let him help put actual dog food in the bowl. Explain why doggies need special food. Teach him to be careful with the scissors or can opener. Use lots of praise if he can manage it by himself. Reward him for being good with 5 minutes of screen time.

OMG I want some of whatever you’re smoking

Once I’ve stopped laughing I’m off to change my username to something onion related.

@SDTGisAnEvilWolefGenius If you read OPs post she says it's a frequent issue in her home of her husband making a big deal of her going back for seconds. For some considerable time, to the point she is fed up with it.

My point is why not put food on the plate in a large enough quantity that you dont need to keep going back for more food. She's an adult. As I said I suspect this is more about some underlying issue her DH has, such as his upbringing or the fact she may be putting on weight and he's not happy with it? I know on MN no one is allowed to say they don't fancy their OH because they are overweight, but in the real world fat isn't attractive to many people. You can say you don't fancy someone because they have a small penis, but not that their overweight. Not saying she is, but there is some issue that needs addressing. Surely OP is grown up enough to discuss the real reason behind her DHs comments?

Ditto @FenellaVelour Op says on several occasions OP has gone back for seconds. Do read what I've actually put. I'm not referring to the starving episode, but several previous episodes.

Tell him to save his portion for the fucking dog! And ask him why he's monitoring your food intake.
Sinister.

Is he trying to control how much you eat?

Why is the dog not eating dog food? All that rich food can’t be good for them?

@goldenharvest - maybe the OP thinks it is a better idea to take a smaller first portion and go back for seconds if she still feels hungry - you could argue that this may be less wasteful than taking a bigger first portion, and leaving some on your plate - because those leftovers can’t be kept for another meal.

Put some onion and/or garlic in your cooking and then you can't feed it to the dog as those are toxic to dogs.

Good god this would piss me off. If he is so concerned about the dog, tell him to give half of HIS food to the fucking dog. I assume the dog eats other than your leftovers? Its not going to starve because you chose to eat a full meal. I would be raging at this..

@unmarkedbythat

Tbh in our house the dog is a part of the family so if for eg were having a chicken roast she will have some. If that means taking a bit off everyones plate then so be it.

You take dinner off the plates of people in the family to include the dog? Really? That's hilarious .

@unmarkedbythat - it's also fucking batshit! I love my dog but there is no way in a million years I'd be taking food off my children's plate to give to the dog!

You are all totally ridiculous for ever feeding your food to the dog.

Your husband is just a bit more ridiculous than you and unfortunately values the dog higher in the family ranking than you.

The dog has dog food not left overs but you guys are never going to understand this.....

I'm off to change my user name to dogscanteatonions before anyone else does,!!

Sorted!

I wouldn't have wasted my dinner by throwing it all to the dog, but of course your husband is ridiculous to keep guilting you over the dog. I'm sure it's been stated (repeatedly) before, but it's really best for dogs to not eat too much "human food", even if it's not outright toxic to them.

Maybe start guilt-tripping him about that. "Oh, poor doggie. Daddy feeding him that nasty human food that's so bad for his health! Doesn't Daddy care about poor little doggie at all?!"

Or start giving him a toddler's portion and when he asks for more, look surprised and say, "But then there won't be enough for the dog!"

With luck, maybe you've bitten his head off enough this time that the message will stick. (I still wouldn't have sacrificed my meal to make the point, though! Maybe I would've gone to the fridge, found something he particularly enjoys, and thrown that into the dog's dish to make up for the lack of shepherd's pie.)

YABVVU. Dog parents should ALWAYS leave some "for the dog". Poor dog. :)

I am totally shocked at this OP. How stupid is your husband?

I would start serving his dinner straight into the dogs dish and say “I thought the dog would like your dinner.”