To think people will expect fireworks to be let off on bonfire night.

[j101112]

Bought a few fireworks for Thursday night. Mainly garden type fireworks, not rockets. Meant to be lower noise.

We live in fairly large village and it’s been said that many dogs, cats, horses etc don’t like them and people have complained about them being let off.

Aibu to think people should expect them on actual bonfire night though?

I get that they are annoying on other nights other than bonfire night.. I do think that people should try and just do them on 5th November or NYE and proper advertised displays.

Don’t want to upset my neighbours!

@OhhCarolina

Also, *@Jakie7700* my friend and her daughter who were at the Manchester concert (not from Manchester, same as most people who were there) and who were injured in the attack have happily come along to neighbourhood fireworks displays since, same as they did before.

I do wonder about these legions of people you are treating, all from the same small locality, who all happened to attend a major city leg of an international tour, and who have all subsequently developed clichéd and unrealistic symptoms as a result of their experience.

What kind of therapy do you engage in?

I think that comment was aimed at me, not Jakie?

I was a secondary teacher at the time but now I’m a lecturer. I’m from Greater Manchester and at the High School of 1200 I was teaching at at the time over one hundred of our students were there and I continue to teach university students who were there - Ariana Grande was a lot of teenage girls idol at the time remember and for Manc kids (including myself growing up) trips to the old MEN were a regular occurrence. It’s around 36 of my former/current students that remain affected by loud noises plus obviously other triggers. Most parents/students can’t afford to pay private for therapy and EMDR etc have waiting lists that are years long in my NHS trust.

I have CPTSD which I am trying daily to overcome but so far haven’t accessed the right therapy/therapist. I’m glad yours was easily treated but you aren’t everyone. Some people do struggle still and yes, loud bangs do affect them. As previously mentioned, I volunteer with refugee families...if you could see how some of the Syrian and Kurdish little children I work with react on bonfire night I really don’t think you’d be so lacking in empathy. And sadly we can’t have our usual music and crafts session tonight that helps take their mind off things due to the pandemic. Refugee children are wayyyyyy down the list of priority for therapies and there is only so much charities can do.

@OhhCarolina
Think you have things confused it was another poster who said they work with people with PTSD not myself. I have a close family friend though with has PTSD and fireworks for them is a trigger. And like many people have posted on here that people they work with or know who have PTSD fireworks are a distress for them surely you do not believe we are all making it up? You are obviously naive in putting everyone with PTSD in the same box which actually is quite offensive. Every sufferer will experience it potentially differently unique to their own circumstances. For some one who suffers from this you are not very well read upon it!

Also no response to any of my other points. I wonder why probably as you have to agree or like like a idiot saying it's ok to terrorise people/animals and put extra pressure on emergency services during this time.

@Sirzy I had trauma focused CBT which was hard going at the time but totally worth it. Studies show that edmr is very effective also. I would recommend it, definitely. 18 sessions.

@Jakie7700 it's not me who is putting everyone with PTSD into the same box. It's actually those casually tossing the phrase around implying everyone with PTSD turns into a wreck every time they hear a firework.

As for fireworks "terrorising" people, again, this is overegging for the sake of your argument. Celebrations, noise etc are all part of living in society. There are lots of things that people do that annoy me and that negatively impact on others' safety, comfort and environment - as said before, owning pets is one. Way more people are injured by dogs than by fireworks every year, if we're just talking in terms of physical harm, so pet owners banging on about their dogs in this context is fatuous.

As for PTSD triggers, these are so many and varied it's impossible to cover them. The best thing a person living with PTSD can do is to get therapy, not ban fireworks.

@OhhCarolina

But most people on this thread that have mentioned PTSD either know someone affected and have seen the distress or work with people who have PTSD. It is a fact some people with PTSD are distressed because of fireworks. No one said 100% of people with this are affected it's just some are the same as some people with SEN some with dementia. You are the one who is being offensive saying it is a completly curable disorder which for some it is NOT.

Just because it has been for you that is great but do not put everyone in the same category saying it is. A person with SEN or dementia can't just get therapy can they so what about them.

So you do not feel a child with sen who is so afraid they vomit as not being terrified? I don't feel this is over exaggerating the terror they cause lots of people. Yes the world is noisy but most noises do not distress people in their own homes for the sake of fun. Name me one other thing other than fireworks that cause people so much noise? And again why is it ok for us humans to cause so much distress to wildlife all for the sake of 'fun.

As for the pet comment yes I understand dogs can cause harm to people but I would bet my life that in the month of November there are dramatically more people in hospital during a pandemic with firework related injuries than people with dog bites! You are completly missing the point it isn't just about physical harm it's the mental distress it causes to people and wildlife.

So do you believe people with other conditions those I have outlined many times should be so affected all so people can have their entertainment?

I despise anyone who let's off fireworks.

Our beautiful, kind, gentle elderly border collie will not leave the house in the afternoons now because wankers have been letting them off as early as 2pm. She is terrified of them, and we've tried everything to help but she's still terrified.

All so people can get the pleasure of seeing bright lights and hearing loud noises for all of 30 seconds.

I would expect them on bonfire night, but think it should be organised displays and they should not be allowed in private gardens in residential areas.

There are some really unintelligent rationalisations on this thread which basically boil down to 'I want to do it so I'm going to'.

"It's not illegal"- neither is laughing at somebody who has injured themselves or farting in a lift (first 2 examples which came to mind). Something being legal does not automatically make it either morally sound or justifiable.

"It is to be expected on bonfire night"... well yeah, I don't think anybody here is expressing surprise about hearing fireworks going off, but that doesn't change the fact that it can still have an incredibly negative impact on people, pets and wildlife. Also, prior warning does not help to offset the negative environmental impact.

"It's been a horrible year"- it's definitely been a real crap-fest, but this is all the more reason to think about the mental health of others before doing something frivolous and inconsiderate. There are many ways of letting off steam and enjoying yourself that don't involve traumatising/killing animals or inadvertently triggering somebody else's PTSD.

@Jakie7700 I'm willing to bet my left big toe that most of the people giving it "think about those poor saps with PTSD" have any experience of it either personally or at close quarters. It's just a handy little trope that's grown up around the discussion on fireworks that people weaponise to make themselves look caring and thoughtful.

And yes there are lots of things that people do that could inadvertently cause distress to others and harm the environment - again, dogs definitely fit this. Plenty of people get distressed being around dogs, often due to past negative experience or sensory issues. And they totally cause much more harm to wildlife than fireworks do, as do cats. It's all back and forward, and there won't be equilibrium until you ban everything - fireworks, dogs, cats, cars, planes etc etc.

My opinion has definitely changed since we got our bunnies. We’ve had them in every night since Halloween, although none went off last night. Rabbits can die of fright. That aside, I believe fireworks should be at formal displays only. They can be so dangerous & it’s just not worth the risk of serious or even life changing injuries.

I have a dog who is a bit nervous, but weirdly just ignores fireworks, he will happily go out for a walk while they are going off as long as they aren't right next to him and give him a surprise.

I do think they should be banned from sale to non-licensed professionals, for all the reasons above which any person with an ounce of consideration or rational thought simply cannot argue against.

The teenagers in our town injured another teen, thankfully not life changing injuries, messing about with them last week.

We'll be having garden fireworks and a fire as always.

But people have told you they have first hand experience with PTSD and you do not seem to believe them. Either way doesn't mean you get to tell other with PTSD it's curable and what does or doesn't distress them just because you have PTSD doesn't make you a expert my love!

Again you refuse to answer any direct questions as you can't!
Why are you so obsessed with dogs? Do you have a underlying issue maybe you should seek some therapy for it as it is curable apparently.
Tbh no point having a discussion with you as you can't answer anything I have asked and have skirted around the fact it causes distress to lots of people. You seem to have a major issue with the pets thing and can't seem to see other issues relating to fireworks.
Your point is well this causes issues so it's ok to let off fireworks. So shall I think fuck it my neighbour has 8 people round that makes it ok to break the rules. Completly stupid response.

@GuyFawkesHadTheRightIdea
Well then your a selfish idiot.

They’re a dangerous waste of money IMO. Why should every pet owner in the country have to deal with frightened pets because of a few selfish people with money to burn?

Surely, ultimately it come down to this. There are some things we ban and some we don't - it's not an all or nothing scenario and never will be. We, as a society, ultimately get to decide what makes the banned list and what doesn't.

Enough people want them banned = off they go

Enough want to keep them = here they stay

[quote Jakie7700]@GuyFawkesHadTheRightIdea
Well then your a selfish idiot.[/quote]
People have them for New Years and Diwali. Where I live they have them for Muslim weddings with the last 60 shot set going off at midnight. This is MOST WEEKS btw not just occasionally.

I don't have them any other night of the year apart from November 5th, so I'm damned sure I can have a couple of Roman candles and some sparklers for my DC with a fire pit for marshmallows on bonfire night. Sorry not sorry.

Is the moral objection to fireworks a matter of the suspect use of money now? Honestly, I just did not see that one coming.

If I were your neighbour I wouldn't mind you setting off fireworks on Bonfire night and I have a dog that doesn't like them.

"It's been a horrible year"- it's definitely been a real crap-fest, but this is all the more reason to think about the mental health of others before doing something frivolous and inconsiderate
I agree. Its clutching at straws. A rubbish year isn't improved by blowing things up.

I do think they should be banned from sale to non-licensed professionals, for all the reasons above which any person with an ounce of consideration or rational thought simply cannot argue against
I agree with you.

Allow them for events at appropriate venues that are overseen by an appropriate professional and stop sales to every Tom,Dick and Harry who thinks the world is incomplete unless they can set fireworks off all night in a residential area.

I don't like them and I don't agree with them, but I do expect to hear them on Bonfire Night, so I wouldn't complain.

@Asdf12345

You must, its a tradition that is worth defending.

Our dogs love fireworks and our horses also just stand and watch. If you keep pets in a country with a tradition of fireworks you have a responsibility to acclimatise them to the things and not to try and change the country to suit you.

I have some sympathy with this. ( We live near a wedding venue).

The minute I heard the first firework I would always say, " Ooh, fireworks dogs! Look DH, fireworks! Let's go look at the fireworks!", always repeating the word. We'd then all go into the garden to look at the fireworks. Our dogs, five of them at different times, were all very happy once they knew we were happy and enjoyed the excitement. One of them loved sparkly things and woukd climb on the garden table for a better look, even when fat and elderly. (The only time he was allowed to do this during the year.) After that we could go back inside for the rest of the night. From their point of view, they knew we had checked it out and were happy.

This worked with all our dogs, even a silly yappy little dog of our daughter's who was a real drama llama! The first year his bigger canine mentors were no longer with us, I thought this is going to be fun. But no, same routine as every year and he was absolutely fine, I was so proud! 🤣

In my area, fireworks are let off pretty much every day without fail. Often in broad daylight pissing it down with rain. The mind boggles.

One night a year is fine

The replies on here in support of fireworks for home use just confirms my opinion that those who buy them are selfish fuckwits.

Here's hoping you or your loved ones don't get dementia and spend hours cowering in a care home thinking the world's going to end just so some morons can watch the shiny shiny bang bang.

@kingofbears

There are some really unintelligent rationalisations on this thread which basically boil down to 'I want to do it so I'm going to'.

"It's not illegal"- neither is laughing at somebody who has injured themselves or farting in a lift (first 2 examples which came to mind). Something being legal does not automatically make it either morally sound or justifiable.

"It is to be expected on bonfire night"... well yeah, I don't think anybody here is expressing surprise about hearing fireworks going off, but that doesn't change the fact that it can still have an incredibly negative impact on people, pets and wildlife. Also, prior warning does not help to offset the negative environmental impact.

"It's been a horrible year"- it's definitely been a real crap-fest, but this is all the more reason to think about the mental health of others before doing something frivolous and inconsiderate. There are many ways of letting off steam and enjoying yourself that don't involve traumatising/killing animals or inadvertently triggering somebody else's PTSD.

well said

@PhlegmyHead

The replies on here in support of fireworks for home use just confirms my opinion that those who buy them are selfish fuckwits.

Here's hoping you or your loved ones don't get dementia and spend hours cowering in a care home thinking the world's going to end just so some morons can watch the shiny shiny bang bang.

good grief