Okay, context
My partner is not the best drunk. In the past there has been alot of trauma due to his drinking, from fights (with me and others) vile arguments, even got arrested once. He has grown out of all that but he still has a stupid habit of not knowing when the party ends, and goes too hard.
Now, on normal days this is fine. If I don't have work, I don't care what time he comes home (I mean I do, but it would be unreasonable of me to give him a time). But there have been occasions in the past where he's come home so late or so drunk I've had to call his mum early hours to pick my children up so I can go to work.
Now this is an argument that we've had for years, that he thinks it's unreasonable for me to ask him to come home at a certain time (2am). He does NOT like being told what to do. Normally he's fairly chill (like I said he has grown out of alot of his past bad behaviour) but frankly I don't trust him and the last thing I want before an NHS 12 hour Sunday shift is to be up worrying that he's going to be coming home in a fit state.
So, we compromised that he wouldn't drink much. He took a 4 pack of beers with him tonight, which won't get him tipsy. But to me it still feels dicey. He still won't commit to a certain time to be home by.
Tonight I've decided to trust him and 'let' him go. He doesn't go out drinking often anymore, even before the pandemic, and figured if we're going into another lockdown he won't know when he'll get to see his friends again (all properly done, rule of 6/outside area/social distanced btw, they're all fairly sensible. My anxiety would not let him go at all if I didn't think he was being safe) but its 1am and I can't sleep for fear he's not going to behave.
Is asking him to come home at 2am when I have work in the morning, even sober, really that unreasonable?