What do you regret not doing?

[jennie0412]

Just that really.

I'm really happy where I am work wise and happily married with dc / travelled etc
However I wish I was more assertive in my youth as I always did things to please others. Was a bit of a doormat for my dm and let a man use me for 7 years.
I also find ciriticsm hard to take and have lost a lot of people and I just cut them off. If I spoke up about things a bit more maybe I would be better off.

Letting my mil take over my wedding planning because I found it easier than arguing even though dh tried to get me to bless him I just said let her get on with it.
The day wasn't what I wanted, wasn't where I wanted and I wish I'd have grown the backbone I have now with her to tell her no.

These days, I try not to have regrets. I do, however, wish I had taken a gap year after my A-levels before I went to uni. I did enjoy uni and it worked out fine in the end but I was utterly burnt out by doing A-levels and would have benefited from the space and time.

I have said this on here before but I wish I had followed my ultimate dream of joining the police. For various reasons, my parents didn't want me to and I was too young and too much of a people pleaser to go for it anyway. I do love my chosen career of teaching but there is always a 'what if' at the back of my mind.

So, I try not to regret anything. Sometimes I wish straight after that I hadn’t done something but I think regret is different it’s something that stays with you.

I have just listened to the audio book of “the midnight Library” by mat haig and I recommend it for anyone with regrets as it is a really good way of looking at how we shouldn’t really have any.

Not being with my dad the night he died.
His partner didn't call me when he'd been taken to hospital ( he had terminal cancer) and only informed me after he died. I lived about 160 miles away but could have reached him before he died if she'd told me.
I have remained very bitter about this for over 10 years.

I regret not going to university.

Not having a gap yah!!!

• Not saving more money when I was young and had loads of disposable income

• Not being brave enough to pack a bag and explore the world before I had responsibilities

• Not being serious enough about my career until recently. I should be further up the ladder than I am

I should have stayed on in academia after my BA. I could have 20 years of experience behind me now, instead of doing a useless PhD now, age 39.

I wish I had concentrated on my education. Circumstances at home were against me and I ended up in that cycle of repeating history.

I regret meeting my ex. Years of emotional, verbal, sexual and financial abuse would have been avoided. OTOH, I don't regret the DC. I'm not a maternal sort, but my 2 DC have enhanced my life and I love them dearly.

I regret the choice of O levels I was pushed into. Being partly deaf was never going to help in learning languages in a class of that size, and if I'd taken my 2nd choice instead of French, I know I'd have done different A levels and manage to get to university back then, when it would have been so much easier. I'm going to take an access course then go on and finally get to do a degree.

I regret not going to pick my son up when he asked me to, he may still be alive today if I had. The guilt will stay with me forever.

I regret not feeling confident and lovely in my younger days.
I regret not being more independent, I had an offer of a job abroad in my early 20s and didn't take the plunge, I had absolutely no ties I should have definitely gone.

I regret not learning touch typing when I was younger. Who knew how useful it would turn out to be?

I regret my marriage, I deeply regret not leaving when I still could and I wish I'd stood up for myself sooner. So much wasted time and potential.

Not joining the RAF when I left school at 17. My dad died the year before which completely messed my head up.

Not shagging about before I met DH

I regret not telling my friend's parents that he'd attempted suicide one year before I'd met him. 18 months later he tried again and succeeded.

Not being brave enough to pack a bag and explore the world before I had responsibilities

This and not learning foreign languages - or even a foreign language.

I regret not saying no to a proposal I knew was wrong for me. Could have saved myself a year of intense pain.

Can't think of any regrets really. Apart from not buying the house next door with everything done, now I have to do stuff to my own house! But things happen for a reason.

Going off to polish my halo now lol.

Thoughts with those who have lost loved ones. I have lost many myself, but still no regrets there, loved them when they were here best I could.

As my dear Dad used to say... "there is no fun in a graveyard, so give me my flowers now". Meaning love me when I'm alive and forget about the tears when I'm gone. Wonderful man.

Trivial but I regret not seeing John Martyn live when he played near me. Hopefully someone will be on to tell me he was rubbish live later on. Also not seeing Prodigy and to an extent Marylin Mason when my schoolmates did, and Nine Inch Nails as a grown up but there's still a chance with them. I know Manson's not dead but doesn't have same appeal as an adult.
I regret not learning to swim properly when I was little because now I am too fearful.

Not going NC with family sooner
Not sticking up for my self when younger with bullies at school and my parents. Still mentally affected now.

I was offered a job working with roadies for bands that were touring the uk and some parts of europe , the pay was low and the hours rough , genaraly working 2pm to 6 or 7pm then the band come on , then the box up ( repacking everything ) at about midnight and on the road to the next venue . Long and tough and very demanding but what a way to see the bands . I did go on some tours and put sets up for U2 , Erasure , Black eyed peas , Stiff little fingers ( what a racket ! ) and quite a few more but I quit because I missed my boyfriend .
We split up a few weeks later . I missed the boat both figuratively literally on joining the crew

Leaving a particular ex and generally staying in relationships too long because
I lacked confidence.

Not just actually asking out the guy I think about almost every day of my life - I thought their would be others like him, but no other guys has ever come close.