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Original poster

Head not allowing my DD school packed lunch

291 replies

peacockfeather11 · 24/10/2020 17:26

This is the first time I taking this up directly with the HT. DD says the food awful and bland, this was brought up last year with the HT by a group of parents and as usual the response was 'we will try a new menu'. It did work for a few weeks and then the standard dropped once again, by then the parents had given up.
Now again this year and same issue, I sent an email and was told they have a 'no packed lunch policy', I can't find this one their web site and no-one seems to think it exists and that a new menu will be introduced. DD is so hungry after school and being in Yr6 has more work but has lost her appetite since going back. She generally has a good appetite and will try anything but says the school food is making her sick.
I sent another mail before holidays and never got a response. I don't know what to do. Any suggestions?

OP posts:
YorkshireLass2012 · 25/10/2020 19:06

Is this a new covid related policy OP? The reason I ask is because our local nursery is no longer accepting packed lunches as a temporary measure due to Covid.

As a PP has advised, I would give the HT until after the half term break to respond. And no I wouldn’t send my child in with a packed lunch as you have already been told this would be against policy. Doing this puts your child in an awkward position imo.

Have you got a parents’ forum to raise this issue in? Our school has a parents’ rep who liaises with the school. And we also have a parents’ WhatsApp group per school year.

Good luck. It is awful when children come home hungry because they didn’t like lunch.

andpeggy1 · 25/10/2020 19:13

@MrsMomoa

Bland food is definitely not a safeguarding issue!Hmm
It bloody should be!
dramaticpenguin · 25/10/2020 19:21

Bit of a random thought but I bet they keep the pasta sitting in water til its mush... i used to work at a secondary school and they had a pasta king franchise, the sauce was alright but the pasta made me feel sick! X

CowCuddler · 25/10/2020 19:30

As a school governor and parent at the school (and former teacher and a current 'designated person for safeguarding' somewhere else), I had to work hard to make our HT understand that making the packed lunch kids sit on the floor to eat their lunches (because the school were short staffed at lunch times and couldn't do 2 sittings for lunch but couldn't fit all the kids in for one sitting!?) was not ok!

Go back to HT with the Gov advice for school dinners mentioned above (which is what I used in the end), send your daughter in with a lunch regardless, don't pay for any more crap lunches, if the Governors back the HT then make a formal complaint to Ofsted and encourage the other parents to do the same (they won't do anything with 1 complaint).

Don't let it go. People saying 'pick your battles', well the HT started this ridiculous one. What does it teach your kids?! Put up and shut up?? Makes me so angry that people think children are not real people and don't deserve to be treated how we would expect to be treated ourselves.

swelchphr · 25/10/2020 19:49

We can’t bring lunches either. Perhaps while you’re figuring this out, they can make slight accommodations. For example, my son (who is in reception, which also may be why they accommodate him) doesn’t eat sauces so when they have spaghetti they will allow give him plain pasta. Not ideal and doesn’t fix the core problem, but at least that would get food in her belly to hold her until home time.

kowari · 25/10/2020 19:49

or spicy as heck (jerk chicken, hot curry or chilli that is really spicy) really weird for a primary but the food is really spicy even for me and i like a bit of spice.
DS would have loved that! He's liked spicier food than me since primary, I think it's more about personal taste and what you are used to than age.

rashalert · 25/10/2020 20:08

OP

What would you and your child think would be a good school lunch?
You've given examples of the unsatisfactory lunches but what would you like?

I think your daughter is laying it on a hit-bland food might bore but it doesn't sicken. Try not to encourage this.

I guess the easy answer is stop paying!

If you do make a packed lunch, what exciting things will you be including in it?

I imagine it will be a marvellous cornucopia of thing, especially as you have only one child to cater for.

Best make sure it is because I have a sneaking suspicion that if it isn't, you'll have made a rod for your own back!

Ki0612 · 25/10/2020 20:10

Im a teacher id have a huge issue with this. Our school dinners are not very nice but they have also went up to £3 a day. They are not worth cost its the cheapest of ingredients no salt/ sugar so it is tasteless. Parents shouldnt be forced to pay school dinner costs regardless of quality of food as a packed lunch can be made much cheaper. Parents shouldn't be paying when kids in school as they wont let them bring a packed lunch!

Belladonna12 · 25/10/2020 20:11

A few people have mentioned not being able to bring packed lunch because of Covid that doesn't make sense. Why would a packed lunch increase the risk? At DDs school they have been told packed lunches are preferred during the pandemic.

Teateaandmoretea · 25/10/2020 20:17

@Belladonna12 it’s truly baffling what apparently can transmit covid 😂🤷🏻‍♀️

namechangenumber204 · 25/10/2020 20:18

This sounds just like what it was like when I was at school. There is a paragraph in Alan Titchmarsh's autobiography where he explains his hatred of custard, I suffered the same. I thought things had improved in the 55 years since I was traumatised...

YorkshireLass2012 · 25/10/2020 20:19

@Belladonna12

A few people have mentioned not being able to bring packed lunch because of Covid that doesn't make sense. Why would a packed lunch increase the risk? At DDs school they have been told packed lunches are preferred during the pandemic.
Our local nursery school have stopped packed lunches so that they can control and limit what gets brought onto the premises. Coats and shoes get taken off at the front door. Indoor footwear and outdoor waterproofs are provided to each child each day. These get washed after each day’s use by one child.
JuliaJohnston · 25/10/2020 20:20

MrsMomoa
Bland food is definitely not a safeguarding issue! Hmm

It bloody should be!

I literally can't understand your post, andPeggy

Unless it was a weak joke?

Barmychick · 25/10/2020 20:26

I'm with minute, consult other parents the contact your LEA. Good luck

Belladonna12 · 25/10/2020 20:26

Our local nursery school have stopped packed lunches so that they can control and limit what gets brought onto the premises. Coats and shoes get taken off at the front door. Indoor footwear and outdoor waterproofs are provided to each child each day. These get washed after each day’s use by one child.

That seems a bit pointless. If the child's things are infected it will be because the child themselves are infectious. Removing their clothes is not going to reduce the risk that they infect other people.

MummyMayo1988 · 25/10/2020 20:30

No packed lunch policy? They cant do that, surely?
This sounds totally bizarre to me.

OhMyDarling · 25/10/2020 20:58

Can she move schools? I had a food phobia as a child and this would have been my idea of pure hell. As it was even eating in a room with other that had school dinners (not in same table) had me stressed all morning on the build up to it and then I was an emotional wreck in the afternoons trying to get over the ordeal. I was a below academic performer in primary. In high school where you could eat anywhere and canteen food was so much better, lunchtime was never an issue and I was a straight A student.
Being made to actually eat that food would have pushed me over the edge, it was torture enough.

Celestine70 · 25/10/2020 21:01

Is this even legal? Can she come home for lunch?

AriesTheRam · 25/10/2020 21:16

Many Schools aren't allowed to cook with salt anymore.I work in one and the cook said herself that she'd love to give the food more flavour but they can't.

HazeyJaneII · 25/10/2020 21:47

I wonder if all the school staff eat school lunches too?

It is crazy not to have the option of a packed lunch.

So either ‘safeguarding issue’
Or ‘sensory issues and therefore discrimination against special needs’ etc

I'd be seriously tempted to say she's gluten free+veggie+dairy free+whatever other convoluted combination you can think of, or that she is currently excluding certain food groups to establish allergies

I think Id go the special needs route - are they prepared to offer a balanced vegan or veggie diet and if not you have to able to bring your own food

These posts are ridiculous, and insulting to children who have genuine medical, dietary or additional needs.

If a child is struggling to that extent then there are clearly some issues at play, so give them a proper name.
Really? I don't think that all children who dislike a bland diet or even those who are picky, have a diagnosable condition. There are childten who have extremely difficult relationships with food, this does not sound like one of those instances (obviously the op would know better, but hasn't mentioned sensory issues, additional needs etc)

if she was hungry she would eat it.
Bollocks
No child ever starved in front of a plate of food...
That's a good base line to have - just 'not starving
Maybe try looking at some of the excellent resources about children around the world who don't have access to food
Oh yes, because that's always been a winner.

FFS this thread has had some doozies

riceuten · 25/10/2020 21:51

I went to a private school, and they banned packed lunches, in an effort to bolster their income from utterly inedible (and costly) dinners, which you were required to pay for whether you took them or not.

Spinakker · 25/10/2020 21:58

Can you give her a large cooked breakfast instead and a cooked meal as soon as she gets back from school?

ComeOnBabyHauntMyBubble · 25/10/2020 22:12

@Spinakker

Can you give her a large cooked breakfast instead and a cooked meal as soon as she gets back from school?
Can you eat a large breakfast at 6/7 am?
ComeOnBabyHauntMyBubble · 25/10/2020 22:17

FFS this thread has had some doozies

Definitely.

Two polarised extremes.
Do and say anything to get your way with no base in reality or law vs "there are children starving in Africa ,you know?".

They're just as ridiculous but somehow laughing at each other.

Lovely13 · 25/10/2020 22:28

I hated school lunches. We were forced to eat them. I devised ways to stick them into hankie etc to bin it. So then hungry for day. It was mad old 70s.
Why are they still doing this? If you can give your child a nice packed lunch, what the hell is your school’s problem?
I would be stamping mad with them. It’s your child. Her health. Her lunch. And it’s 2020!