Head not allowing my DD school packed lunch

[peacockfeather11]

This is the first time I taking this up directly with the HT. DD says the food awful and bland, this was brought up last year with the HT by a group of parents and as usual the response was 'we will try a new menu'. It did work for a few weeks and then the standard dropped once again, by then the parents had given up.
Now again this year and same issue, I sent an email and was told they have a 'no packed lunch policy', I can't find this one their web site and no-one seems to think it exists and that a new menu will be introduced. DD is so hungry after school and being in Yr6 has more work but has lost her appetite since going back. She generally has a good appetite and will try anything but says the school food is making her sick.
I sent another mail before holidays and never got a response. I don't know what to do. Any suggestions?

Is it a private school? State schools don't normally insist on school dinners only.

I think the school is in a time warp. We weren't allowed packed lunches at the primary school I went to in the 70s and I rarely at lunch because it was disgusting. I did a lot better academically at secondary school and I suspect it was because I wasn't hungry all the time (they had a much better food with choices). Anyone who doesn't think a child won't go hungry if they don't like the food is clueless. I would make a fuss.

You could go to OFSTED or go to your local council they should have a schools department to raise concerns - its a load of rubbish on schools part.

If the school has a no packed lunch policy, you need to go with that, sorry. They often have a sandwich or wrap option which is better.

I don't know about other people, but I certainly couldn't afford to spend £43 a month on school dinners. Moreso, if its a five week pay month, money is already tight, and £54 extra is a no go. That's perfect child. So two kids that's £86 minimum a month! That's more than a weeks worth of food for four of us!

If it is school policy then I don’t think you can really argue.
Can you find out exactly what she doesn’t like , and see if she eats the same at home.
You also have to think if you were to succeed in persuading the school to allow a packed lunch would she be the only one ? Feel singled out ?
She is year 6 I would be tempted to just get by for the next few months, perhaps give her a more substantial snack, peanut butter sandwich and a banana for example. After a breakfast at home and a home cooked meal in the evening this would be more than adequate even if she ate no lunch.
I think it’s also important that we don’t limit what children will eat by only giving them food they like it can really restrict their diet and make them quite picky.

I would not pay for school dinners and send her with packed lunch. Communicate this is what you will be doing. Don’t pack anything with nuts in case of kids with allergies.

@JuniLoolaPalooza

Our menu is basically freezer food and the same all the time - jacket pots, pizza, fish fingers, pasta bake on rotation. Dc would probably love a turkey twizzler.

So you never cook the same meals over and over at home ? Would love some of your ideas on a menu that never serves the same dishes

@Annie2245

If it is school policy then I don’t think you can really argue. Can you find out exactly what she doesn’t like , and see if she eats the same at home. You also have to think if you were to succeed in persuading the school to allow a packed lunch would she be the only one ? Feel singled out ? She is year 6 I would be tempted to just get by for the next few months, perhaps give her a more substantial snack, peanut butter sandwich and a banana for example. After a breakfast at home and a home cooked meal in the evening this would be more than adequate even if she ate no lunch. I think it’s also important that we don’t limit what children will eat by only giving them food they like it can really restrict their diet and make them quite picky.

I'm pretty sure she can argue if it's against the education act. Totally disagree that breakfast and evening meal is adequate on a daily basis. Children who are hungry do not learn as well.

As someone else has already said, state schools cannot operate a no packed lunch policy...they cannot expect parents to pay for a school meal. You are also within your rights to collect your child at lunch time and feed them at home and then take them back to school again (fine if you don’t work, otherwise very difficult). School meal menus always sound great but sometimes what is served up is quite the contrary (not in all cases). Schools can however, stipulate that packed lunches can’t have fizzy pop, sweets etc. as part of their policy.

I always sent in DD with a packed lunch in primary school because the dinners were horrible. In secondary school we tried her on the school dinners which she said were much nicer but the queues were so long she didn't have time to properly sit dand eat it so she and her friends all take in packed lunches. I wouldn't know what to do if packed lunches weren't allowed.

Its not a safeguarding issue and as a parent and a teacher I personally think misusing these terms atm very unhelpful.
On the packed lunch issue we allow packed lunches , but if this is a primary school there are issues with the balancing of packed lunches. The paid for hot lunches subsidise the free school.meals in primaries and this has always been the case. Maybe now there are more free lunch students its an issue? I would suggest your child takes a morning break snack to supplement.

How ridiculous. Reminds me of my primary school in the 1970s when the dinner ladies would make kids cry if they left any of the disgusting, overcooked, lumpy food. I can’t eat mash potato even now - just reminds me of being forced to eat it at school and feeling sick. You’d hope by now we’d learned to treat children better and respect their views on what they want to eat. As a pp said, imagine if you told another adult that they
could have no say in what food they ate. It’s not teaching a good lesson about respecting others is it? I’d complain on those grounds, that it’s normal these days to treat children as fellow human beings whose reasonable preferences should be respected.

I think Id go the special needs route - are they prepared to offer a balanced vegan or veggie diet and if not you have to able to bring your own food.

I think Id go the special needs route - are they prepared to offer a balanced vegan or veggie diet and if not you have to able to bring your own food.

Being vegetarian or vegan is not a Special Educational Need FFS
There are plenty of sensible, valid arguments to be made against a 'no packed lunches' rule without OP embarrassing herself (and her DD!) by making up nonsense.

If the HT doesn't respond to a request from a group of parents could you then send a letter to the school governors asking to see the policy and asking when it's due for renewal? Then target parent governors to support your request

I'm glad someone has mentioned cost because a 'no packed lunch policy' means some parents will really struggle to pay for the school lunch. I pay about £120 a month on lunches for two and school travel for one. It's cheaper to keep them home. We can afford it thankfully but many who are not entitled to a free meal for their children will find the cheaper packed lunch option much more favourable.

It is not a school policy. It is not on the website and it was not advertised to parents as such.
Even if it was,since it’s a state school they can’t do that.

I can’t believe some people are insistent that it’s ok to 1.force parents to pay for school dinners(what about the ones that can’t afford it?) and 2.pay for meals their child might not even be able to eat(due to allergies,sensory issues etc) .

It’s irrelevant that OP’s daughter isn’t in any of those categories, since it’s a blanket policy it will affect children that are.

Oh you’re yet another Mumsnetter with a huge income & conservative values.
When will you understand that millions of women work in low paid nursing/caring jobs & get paid very very little more than they would on benefits. But they have the additional expenses of working. They work antisocial rotas & long hours. They get NO extra government benefits. But the idiot footballer wants to give an extra £15 a week to parents on benefits just for a kids lunch. This is sticking 2 fingers up to those single parents who actually get off backsides and goto work.
So we’re the idiots are we ? And our kids go hungry.

@FallonCarringtonWannabe

Having worked in schools for twenty years, I assume the person suggesting bland lunches is a safeguarding issue lives on another planet.

It's utter drivel. Honestly the OP has got some posters done up like a kipper

@abitwitchy

I think Id go the special needs route - are they prepared to offer a balanced vegan or veggie diet and if not you have to able to bring your own food.

Wtf is "the special needs route"?! The op's child doesn't like bland food. Tough shit. There are no "needs" here, special or otherwise. Some posters on this thread are something else 🤦‍♀️

Can she have a massive cooked breakfast and take snacks for after school? Would they know if she had a sandwich in her bag and ate it discreetly in the playground?

@prh47bridge

A state-funded school cannot have a "no packed lunches" policy. Education Act 1996 section 512(5) requires maintained schools to provide facilities for the consumption of packed lunches. Whilst this only applies directly to maintained schools, academies are required to follow the relevant law by their funding agreements. Banning packed lunches is clearly contrary to this.

The head should read the "School food in England" advice for governing bodies published by the DfE last year. About halfway down p5 it says, "Facilities to eat the food that they bring to school must be provided free of charge for pupils not taking school meals. As a minimum these facilities should include accommodation, furniture and supervision so that pupils can eat food they have brought from home in a safe and social environment."

wow thank you so much @prh47bridge!! Amazing.

The paid for hot lunches subsidise the free school.meals in primaries and this has always been the case. Maybe now there are more free lunch students its an issue? I would suggest your child takes a morning break snack to supplement.

Let me get this straight. The OP should pay (what is it? 36 quid?) a week for meals that her DD won't eat so the FSM children can be fed? Don't get me wrong - FSM are a godsend for some children. But there is no way i would pay for lunches for my DD and snacks for her.

That's one of the more batshit things I've read on this thread.

we have the opposite - mine wont eat it because the options are either loaded with dairy (cant eat due to allergy) or spicy as heck (jerk chicken, hot curry or chilli that is really spicy) really weird for a primary but the food is really spicy even for me and i like a bit of spice. There are those that like bland and avoid the meals and those that arent given the option and have to eat it or go hungry (believe me - the parents that pay for school meals are really paying for nothing because 1 the portions are really tiny so even if they eat it all they are really hungry by the time they go home and 2 most kids leave at least half because they dont like it). Neither of mine are fussy, 1 is literally a dustbin and eats everything but says both primary and secondary have awful food, he still eats it but doesnt like it (pack lunch is an option but apparently not cool) my other one will have the roast and the fish but the other days are usually chilli, curry and spicy noodles. Sometimes they have a cottage pie or sausages which she has but says it's not great. Im of the 'get what your given' mentality with food unless you have allergies but even i draw the line with school food because a hungry kid cant focus so if they arent going to eat it i would send a packed lunch and the school would just have to deal with it.

Nothing changes - i was veggie at school and all i got was a cheese salad (i say salad - it was the 80s so a lot of iceberg lettuce, a slice of tomato and a sprinkle of grated carrot) every day, if it snowed it was a vile findus cheese pancake. for 10 years that is all they could come up with!!