Hungry kids and shitty views

[icequeen34]

I apologise as I'm sure there are already threads on this topic. But I feel so so sad and angry today, not only about Marcus Rashfords campaign to feed hungry kids over the holidays being rejected. But some of the horrible views and justifications being spouted - mainly the old 'lazy parents need to take responsibility for feeding their kids' remark. Some utter twat was saying poor families should grow their own food because 'it's not hard' and another Tory MP claimed the blame lies with absent parents (as if his leader isn't one of those).

These are terrible comments from privileged people who clearly don't understand the lack of time, money, outdoor space and education needed to grow your own or shop more savvy. But even in the cases of the worst most lazy parents, why can't people see that the children shouldn't be the ones to suffer? It really boils my blood especially when MPs get so much in terms of expenses for food.

Sorry for the rant I just feel very disappointed and upset today.

[Handsoffisback]

pumper I was responding to jennifers post mentioning a previous experience I had on here.

[Handsoffisback]

I am fully supportive of a government scheme to feed hungry children whether the parents are poor or just feckless, it makes no odds to me, the kids should be fed.

[ghostyslovesheets]

Thank you jennifer. I’ve given that viewpoint on here before and been accused of lying which really hurt. I know a family of 6 children who would be shut in a bedroom on a Friday and Saturday night from 6pm until the early hours while their shit parents spent all the benefits at the pub. They were given a biscuit each, no tea. Middle class mumsnet needs to wake up. A lot of people are reckless with money. I don’t care what people say on here, it happens, I’ve lived it

I work for children's services - I am under no illusion or 'middle class' view of how people can and do live - but kids still deserve to be fed

The issues described above is a safeguarding concern and should have been reported

[Handsoffisback]

Your mum sounds lovely ghosty bless her for that was a kind hearted lady

[ghostyslovesheets]

I am also the child of a single parent in the 1970's who used to go without food so we could eat - I've known hardship first hand - stop assuming everyone here has no life experience

[Handsoffisback]

It was numerous times ghosty. The younger children were eventually removed and the older ones were old enough to not be put into the care system. Sadly I know a lot about the case as one of the children was my ex boyfriend at the time. The children were being locked on and would be beaten if their drunk asshole dad came back and thought they’d tried to get out.

[ghostyslovesheets]

Handsoff she really is a good human being - I'm very lucky to have a good role model

[Handsoffisback]

ghosty are you aiming that at me? I wasn’t referring to this thread, as you’ll see from the post of mine that you copied, I said about a previous thread I’d written on before and was accused of lying. I wasn’t saying this thread.

[ghostyslovesheets]

Handsoff it awful the way some parents behave - I'm glad some of the kids escaped - although what to?

[suchclearwater]

We can't possibly claim to be a civilised society when children go hungry and poeple live on the streets.

[Handsoffisback]

Sadly 3 went to prison, 2 of his sisters were pregnant by horribly abusive blokes as teenagers and my ex, well he has awful mental health problems put it that way.

[ghostyslovesheets]

awful - parents mess their kids up and very often the system finishes the job :( that's so sad Handsoff

[Suzi888]

All Children should have breakfast and lunch supplied at school.

Some parents don’t care if their children eat or not! It’s not just food it’s not washing, not having clean clothes, coats in winter, brushed hair etc.

[LakieLady]

@maryberryslayers

Of course it parents responsibility to feed their children, but for what ever reason, be it because they are genuinely on the bones of their arse no matter what they do, or because they are selfish fuckwits who prioritise booze and fags over their children, it's irrelevant. The important thing is that the children get fed.

It amazes me that it's even necessary to point out that the priority should be feeding hungry children, but thank you for pointing this out to those who seem to think that letting children go hungry is an acceptable option, @maryberryslayers.

[Handsoffisback]

My lovely mum pretends to just happen to ‘find’ clothes (they’re really decent and donated by some well off parents where she works) and gives them to the children at school that have holes in their shoes and cardigans on 3 sizes too small. Bless her she really tries but the amount of children coming to school like this, she just can’t keep up.

[Wroxie]

Sorry if someone has said this already but... rich parents are feckless, neglectful, abusive, or some combination thereof in the same proportion as poor parents. Hell, I'd say they're worse - I worked as a temp nanny when I was younger and the majority of the parents I worked for were neglectful and selfish- they would easily go days or weeks without seeing or thinking about their children and when they were around their children at all, they were bored at best, contemptuous at worst. Never loving or happy or interested unless it was for show.

Since they were also rich, they could pay people (like me) to make sure their kids were fed and physically safe. Not that they particularly cared about the kids either way, but no one wants to deal with social services knocking at the door and if the nanny and the boarding school have it all in hand, well, that just makes things easier, doesn't it?

I grew up poor, I knew poor people, not just a little poor but the kind of desperate that means days or weeks without electricity when things are at their worst. I have encountered far more terrible rich parents than terrible poor parents.

[Handsoffisback]

lakie it’s really odd isn’t it that we have to justify it. If you saw someone beating their child in the street, would you first do an assessment on whether the parents were deemed ‘good’ in the eyes of society before rescuing the child? Or worthy of help? Or if the dad had a criminal record would people just think, ‘oh well little Johnny deserves it because his dads a wrong un’. Yet somehow this viewpoint to not feed the kids of feckless parents is acceptable to certain people.

[zoemum2006]

I have a slight 'zero tolerance/ no excuses' attitude in my own life but the way I see it is that it doesn't matter if parents are completely undeserving and feckless: CHILDREN HAVE TO EAT.

If we don't feed kids we'll only end up having to pay a lot more via the NHS when those kids then get ill.

It's a waste of money to be so cruel (which pretty much sums up this government really).

[Fajitanita]

We should feed the children, but not give more resources directly to parents who won't neccessarily spend it on them.

[TasslesandFringes]

Didn’t SureStart used to be useful for helping parents get their act together on cooking / parenting / food safety, etc etc? Oh wait....

Why is is okay to punish children of ‘feckless’ parents, disabled parents, parents with mental illness and addiction problems ... but it’s okay to soend our hard earned taxes on wodges of cash spent on:-

HS2
Fairytale bridges
EOTHO
Dodgy track and trace contracts
Dodgy track and trace contractors crazy pay
Bus posters making nonsensical claims re Brexit

Etc etc etc

[Malachite234]

@LocksMyth

When your rent alone is over £1k a month ( standard for South East) and you're on £8.72 an hour, it doesn't take much working out to be honest.

@LocksMyth

So move elsewhere with cheaper rent?

[ghostyslovesheets]

your mum sounds lovely as well Handsoff

I remember my primary school having a 'lucky dip' to see which 3 kids would get their trip to the seaside paid for - I was one of them - so chuffed I couldn;t wait to tell my mum - of course there where only 3 names in the bag - me and the other 2 poor kids in my class - it was very kind the way they did it. I think my mum remembers kindness like that and pays it forward

[CanwerollontheNY]

@Devlesko

I agree that it's the fault of absent parents not paying their way.
Question is, what does he intend to do about it?
Anyone fancy a campaign to make them pay then.
Name on the birth cert you cough up, if it isn't DNA test?

If parents are unable to feed or clothe their children the state should step in, but they obviously don't want to.
What a world for our children to inherit.

The problem here is that mothers continue to have child after child despite having poor circumstances and lack of finances. We cannot just blame they fathers it takes 2 people to bring a child in to the world.

I feel for people who are struggling but I cannot understand for the life of me why anyone is struggling yet chooses to expand their family unit creating further issues.

We can’t expect the state to step in and provide clothes and so on let’s be real who would fund this? We have a welfare system and right now it will be used more than ever..

[SicklyToaster]

I don't really want any child to not have a chance, so I'm happy to pay taxes in that respect.
That said, it's a fact that "feckless parents" can exist and thrive because people like me - who pay higher rates of tax and would perform a
conservative financial analysis before entering into an obligation like parenthood - also exist.
The incentives don't feel fair, but I don't really know what a better option would look like though.

[ghostyslovesheets]

maybe force poor women to have terminations - I mean we've already stopped paying benefits for more than 2 kids - lets make life even more shit for poor women