This is a bad reason to reject a potential secondary school, isn’t it?

[Bvop]

Went to a virtual open evening at a local girls’ school last night and I very quickly got a gut feeling it wasn’t the right place for DD. The thing that tipped my opinion was that the head of year was wearing an absolute face full of makeup, false lashes, eyeshadow, lips, cheeks and the works, and the head was similar. The head girl was similar but without the false lashes. I know I am judging, and I know things go deeper than looks but also I don’t want my dd to have this as the exemplar during her time at school. AIBU to strike this school off the list of potentials for this reason?

[namechangetheworld]

From somebody who hardly ever wears make-up - you sound like a judgemental cow.

Your daughter being taught by someone wearing false eyelashes is the least of her worries with a mother like you.

[MoonJelly]

I would be dubious about putting my child for several years under the influence of role models who put that much emphasis on artificial 'enhancement' of their appearance.

[SBTLove]

Women don’t just wear make up to please men or to boost their confidence, they like it and choose to and why not?
And the women you are denegratjng may very well wear it to boost their self esteem, you have no idea why anyone does.
Maybe you don’t wear it because you don’t have the confidence to apply it or wear it. Who knows?
One thing about you OP is that you’re no feminist, so please stop that pretence.
Your DD will grow up and make her own choices which hopefully won’t be the same as her nasty judgemental mother.

[Bvop]

@SBTLove

Women don’t just wear make up to please men or to boost their confidence, they like it and choose to and why not?
And the women you are denegratjng may very well wear it to boost their self esteem, you have no idea why anyone does.
Maybe you don’t wear it because you don’t have the confidence to apply it or wear it. Who knows?
One thing about you OP is that you’re no feminist, so please stop that pretence.
Your DD will grow up and make her own choices which hopefully won’t be the same as her nasty judgemental mother.

I respect your right to label me as nasty and judgemental. Less so deciding whether or not I’m a feminist. There is a broad church of feminism from liberals to radfems, and there isn’t a central creed that we sign up to.

[SBTLove]

I believe women can dress however they like and not be judged for it especially by other women.

[2020iscancelled]

Why do women who don’t wear make up or only wear “natural” or understated make up have such a moral superiority complex?

If it’s a very good school then they are most likely very good staff - so on that basis yes you are unreasonable. And being a judgey arse as well.

I love make up, I’m educated, have a successful career, family, relationship and plenty of good qualities plus I’m a decent, kind person.

You’d be better to focus on teaching your DD to be the person she wants to be (with or without “heavy” make up) and let other women worry about their own faces

[PinkArt]

2020 and women's capabilities are still being judged by what the choose to put on their faces!
FWIW I can't begin to imagine how much I'd have laughed at my mum if she suggested my style/ beauty choices might have been influenced by my head teacher's choices.

[ArtieFufkinPolymerRecords]

And out of interest, what’s wrong with the way they look without make-up? Why are they not confident enough in their own skins to look like themselves? Are their make-up choices centred on male expectations of womanhood? How much of a tax on their day is make up application and removal? Is this the same for the wonderful male staff and sixth formers, or do they just get more free time to do the stuff they need to do?

Do you judge women who choose to wear anything other than the plainest of clothes? What's wrong with wearing an identical plain, knee-length shift everyday? Why do they need to try and look stylish, or more colourful, have fun or just make themselves feel good through their choice of clothing?

[Duanphen]

I'd have sacked it off too. Most schools ban makeup - while you might get away with something subtle, the idea is you're banning the full-face madness that some would wear. Why has this school decided to permit it, and what else do they permit?

[Nanny0gg]

@Bvop

Nope, not looking for an excuse to be judgemental, just that I am being honest with myself about what put me off the school. My dd isn’t into frills and ribbons and lip gloss, and I want her to go to a school where she can be herself. We’ve seen a couple of other girls’ schools where the pupils and teachers were well presented but not made up, and a few mixed schools, so we have plenty of other options.

I wear makeup.

I can assure you I am being 'myself'.

Your inverse snobbery is something to behold!

[notacooldad]

What a crazy post OP
Do what you want but some of the things you are saying wither don't make sense or will come to bite you on the bum.

[Maldives2006]

A lot of the comments here explain why my daughter won’t be going to a girl’s school.

Wearing a full face of make up doesn’t transfer into intelligence or the ability to do a job.

[IsurvivedbutdidI]

This is a funny one because I love make up and I work in a 'serious male dominated industry' in a role in which I wish to be treated as an equal. I think women should be able to feel that they can express their feminine side if they chose to do so and also be taken seriously in the work environment (school in this case). In my mind I would not write that school off just because women are wearing makeup. Women can be feminine and enjoy make up AND be intelligent.

[Whatwouldscullydo]

A lot of the comments here explain why my daughter won’t be going to a girl’s school

Do you even know what goes on in mixed schools ....

[whenwillthemadnessend]

Personally I wouldn't care that much about the make up issue.

Are the girls happy
Are they receiving a well rounded education
Do they have any opportunity to mix with boys at another school
(I'd say even more important in COVID times as many mixed sexed clubs are closed)
There results good
Is there a history of bullying or eating disorders

Does your dd show an interest in going there.

They would be the more important questions

[littlebillie]

It's not a big issue, if the school is good go for it

[BlusteryShowers]

The feeling of the OP is that if the female teachers confirmed to a more masculine style of business wear then she would find them more credible. Less make up. Flat shoes. Identikit office wear.

The vibrant, proud, confident and successful women she came across are seen as shallow and pathetic because they've dressed in a feminine way.

[Casschops]

I don't wear lots of makeup but I'm certainly offended by people do. I can't think of anything less important.

[Casschops]

not offended.😁🤦‍♀️

[NeonGenesis]

If it's this important to you then it's as good a reason as any.

[BlusteryShowers]

@NeonGenesis

If it's this important to you then it's as good a reason as any.

So if it has great results, happy students, strong curriculum, varied extra curricular programme, nice facilities

But the some of the teachers like eyelash extensions and may have overdone the lippy on a zoom presentation ...

Then she should pick a weaker school. Based only on that?

What absolute rubbish.

[Readandwalk]

Sorry OP you are being ridiculous. Since when does wearing make up impact on ability to do a job?

It doesn't matter what your opinion is, teachers are there to educate your child. If you think make up impact on this I dread what else you're going to criticise in the school. Ffs!

[NeonGenesis]

Based only on that?

Well, yes. It's obviously an issue that's really important to the OP, otherwise she wouldn't feel this way. I personally wouldn't give a shit about it but we are all different and have different priorities when raising kids. So like I said, if it's important to her then yes, that is reason enough.