How do people afford to buy so much?

[Ilovexmastime35]

Aibu to be confused about where I'm going wrong?! Of course everyone's financial situation is different and for those earning well it is no problem paying out for clothes/shoes etc.
But for low - mid earners, how do you afford things? I see people on social media going out regularly, days out, holidays, clothes, city breaks, seaside trips, buying new technology etc. I know what jobs they do and they are not high earners. How are they doing this?

I want to treat my kids to a day out over half term. I've just looked at booking tickets to a local safari park for 2 adults 2 children. It comes to £145!!
I was looking at a local meet Santa on a train event, £80! We can't do it because if I bought those tickets I wouldn't have any money left for anything else for a month.
I think these prices are extortionate and for low-mid earners most people cannot afford these prices.

I need new clothes, boots and a coat desperately. I'm plus size so cannot shop at Primark. The cheapest I can find is a cardigan is priced £34.99. A coat over £59. I just cannot afford these things! My clothes have holes in and my shoes leak!

Im unable to work at the moment ,but my husband earns just over 50k. After all bills, food, fuel, we have about £200 disposal income to last a month. We don't drink, smoke, we don't eat out or socialise. Our money goes on the children and the house. There is never a penny left over for us.

I think in comparison to wages, most things are priced too high. I'm grateful we have a roof over our heads and can afford food but everthing else seems out of reach!. My husband is senior management, he can't earn any more than he does now. We are not frivolous at all. Any advice on how to afford these things apart from getting into debt?

Are your bills and your mortgage really high? How big is the loan you have for the car etc. Do you have really high petrol or commute costs?
Are your groceries really high for some reason - special diets etc?

On £3,000 take home, even if your mortgage is £1,000+, you'd be spending £1,800 per month on everything else to only have £200 left over.

Groceries for a family of 4 - say £500 is generous. Many people manage much less.
Petrol - £100? More? Or less?
Bills & insurance etc - another £500?
Clothes - £25 per person per month = £100
Kids activities - this can add up really quickly
Christmas, birthdays etc - as little or as much as you can afford

You must be servicing a high level of debt (mortgage and loan) or spending more than average on bills & kids stuff.

I think sometimes people earn a lot more than you think they do? Me and my partner are civil service and not particularly high up but will allowances and things we earn about £90k combined. We haven’t gone crazy with the mortgage so we have a good amount of disposable money per month. We don’t drink much or smoke so days out and gadgets is where we spend money.

What size are you op? I'm a 20 to 22 and get cardugans and jumpers from h and m. I think if you posted the headlines of your budget. People here can be quite good at helping. Obviously some will just use it to judge but I've seen some good money saving advice.

Do you pay for childcare?
I think on the day out stuff lots of people get offer and use groupon. As well as doing stuff like the petting farm rather than safari park.

Also as many pp's have said for lots of people debt is a fact of life to fund their lifestyle.

Skatepark = £12 for 2 hours.

Sounds cheap until you have to pay for two kids, 2 sets of scooter hire and 2 sets of protective pads - £40 = and then pay for a drink in the cafe afterwards!

All in not much change from £60.

I don't get it either!

I used Tesco club card vouchers, West Midlands safari park twice. Legoland, sea life centre x3, other places as well.

Primark do go up to quite large sizes, New Look have a plus size range and they are not extortionate, as do most of the supermarkets.

There's a myriad of reasons why some families afford days out and others chose not to prioritise these. For example, I'm an older mum, so I had bought and paid for all furniture before I had DD. So that's one less bill I have each month than you.

We've done up our home and don't regularly redecorate or upgrade.

We live SE so housing is more expensive than other areas.
We only have one child which cuts our costs.
We don't smoke or drink at all.
We don't have tv packages.
My DH used to work for a company that gave us loads of vouchers each year for theme parks.
I save my Tesco club card points
I use Quidco and Topcashback a lot
Our house is tiny, so energy costs are low.

I'm not saying all of this to be superior. It's just to highlight that all families have differing costs and priorities.

Assume your loan is the lowest interest rate you could get? And you've checked for best deals on all your bills?

You are paying off loans so will always be in catch up. You also don't say what your mortgage is. DH's wage is 3/4 of yours and i have a small income that probably brings up to parity, we spend a lot on food through preference, our fixed outgoings, all in, are under 1500pm and we have a lot of money left to use as we like.

It's the loans that will make the difference. We use credit cards but pay them off in full, every month. Car is saved for and paid for up front. Furniture and big household purchases go on the cards and get paid off that month. As a result, we're not constantly playing catch up.

www.ebay.co.uk/itm/Womens-Ladies-Chunky-Cable-Knit-Cardigan-Button-Long-Sleeves-Grandad-Plus-Sizes/223294577672?hash=item33fd64dc08:g:A30AAOSwUG1eKVWe&var=522078288011

Here you go, cardigans for 13.99 up to a size 22. There will be a lot of other options, that's just an example.

You are too vague. People are making assumptions and trying to help. But unless you provide details what's the point?

In answer to your question, you probably don’t know their full situation - or they simply get into debt.

People seem to view debt very negatively but in fact if managed properly you can use interest free deals pretty much constantly and pay up things over time (think someone already mentioned the “catalogue” type sites etc). I could never have afforded anything in my 20s without credit. Having debt doesn’t sit well with some people though so it’s a personal choice really. “Good” and well managed debt will give you a high credit score and then you might get loans/mortgages at low interest rates, so outgoings can lower overall. Personally think they should to teach this stuff in schools!

I think we need a breakdown of your expenditure to see where you’re going wrong.

If you have a household income of £50k, you should be relatively comfortable unless you’re in an expensive part of the country.

Also, I think a lot of people underestimate how much people earn and how much financial help they receive from parents/grandparents.

What does your mortgage and loans come too. If it's high then that's your problem. Not buying a winter coat and cardigan.

I do our outings using vouchers buy 1 get 1 free. For instance, I brought a hand soap that had a deal for tickets to London aquarium. Always on the look out for them.

Agree with others that some of your outgoings must be very high. Our annual income is around £50k (DH and I both work full-time in £25k jobs) and we have a high mortgage and three DC.

We do need to watch the pennies and rarely have holidays, expensive days out, eat out or have takeaways. However I don't feel particularly badly off. We save, pay into pensions, run two (old) cars, never use credit, get work done on our house when we can afford it and spend money on our children's hobbies.

I don't agree with you that £35 for a cardigan or £60 for a coat is a lot of money. I always try and buy the best quality I can afford so items last but I do look for bargains. I try and plan clothes purchases ahead and often buy things out of season; last summer I bought a pair of winter boots reduced from £140 to £40. This week I've bought something I couldn't otherwise afford on ebay. We all make different choices though.

OP, where abouts are you?

My local market in London has lots of brand new reduced M&S clothing. Last time there was a brand new tagged M&S tagged cashmillon cardigans for £5! Highest size was 22.

I bought a silk M&S blouse with tag saying £70 for £8.

Well there is your answer you chose to take out a loan to buy new furniture and a car . You say your husbands income has to pay for everything as if that’s unusual , lots of families only have one wage coming in for whatever reason and can still budget to afford days out and clothes .

I am plus size. I recently got 6 jumpers and cardigans for £36 in the M&Co sale. they are nice items. I am on a low wage and always buy in sales or charity shops. I always find there's a lot of plus size stuff in charity shops as people lose a large amount of weight and donate stuff. I do wonder how people do it though. I have friends where the wife doesn't work and never has done and husband is in low paid work. They are constantly eating out, going on day trips, at the cinema. I have no idea how they do it. They are originally from another country and I honestly think they must have an income stream there which they dont declare here.

I can understand this. Husband earns similar but we don't get £3100 as mentioned by a pp after tax. It doesn't help that his office forgot to submit details of company car (I know we should have checked and it's our fault) so we're repaying that debt but it's about £2750

Mortgage, pet insurance, life insurance and illness cover, home and car insurances, car tax, council tax, utilities and water take a large chunk and one loan that we had to complete an extension.

We are left with more than the OP says, but I'm also reluctant to spend those kind of sums on family days out or coats as want to put money away each month too. The money we do have left after bills and savings disappears in no time with new clothes for DC, an activity for them and presents etc for family (seems like a birthday or an occasion for someone every month!)

The tax implications are much more than if we were both earning 25K - we could claim child benefit then too but we can't on his salary (50K but benefit of company car takes it over threshold, though I'm registered for NI)

We've tried to streamline it too but already shop at Asda and Lidl, and compared market for best insurance rates. Life and illness cover alone is nearly £100 a month, but if we didn't have it and something happened where would that leave us?

I'm due DC2 shortly but will be looking for a new job once they are old enough. We are quite happy and comfortable but I do understand OP's point

Just chiming in I imagine it's the car. We would have similar disposable income if we drove but we don't. We live centrally and I now work from home but it would sink all of our disposable to need a car

Do you have a big mortgage? How much is the loans?

Don't forget also that many people have a lot more spare cash this year anyway.

Some have lost their jobs and struggle with the restrictions obviously, but others have saved a lot by working from home, not spending a penny on childcare and school clubs, and saved even more by not being able to go on holiday, or just days out, cinemas etc.

Even if all your money goes on your children, there wasn't much to spend on this year for many parents.

Op, you sound just like us, even a similarish income...I honestly don't know how other people do it. I'm very frugal, we're not high earners but we're above average...have a pretty small mortgage. I never go out, don't smoke or drink...yet permanently skint. I will say though, I have no debt except my mortgage