Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. A phone that grows with your child.

Meet the Other Phone.
A phone that grows with your child.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To ask if you see your neighbours having too many people over at christmas will you report them?

429 replies

ShesMadeATwatOfMePam · 17/10/2020 18:55

Just that really. Will you actually report your neighbours if you see they have over 6 people at christmas, if the rule of 6 is still in place?

Yabu: yes i will report them
Yanbu: i wouldn't report

From my point of view, i wouldn't report.

OP posts:
PyongyangKipperbang · 18/10/2020 02:06

I have 6 kids. 3 live with me. One is disabled and cant go out without my help so might as well live with me. The other two, one is a uni but this is her official home (she and we are not in a T2 or T3 area at present) and the other has just recently got over being CV+ so hopefully not a risk by Xmas. That's 7. Report away, we will be having Xmas together.

I wont be reporting anyone else for doing the same thing. I am not my neighbourhood Inminbanjang

RamblinRosie · 18/10/2020 02:15

If a neighbour was an MP, I’d report them in a flash.

If my neighbour who has 4 kids, so a household of 6 has a widowed MIL for the day, no way!

Nor any other neighbour, all of whom have been spectacularly gorgeous throughout.

NRatched · 18/10/2020 02:15

Nope. And will most likely be breaking the 6 rule myself, despite currently not being allowed to mix at all so even the 6 rule is breaking it!

Awwlookatmybabyspider · 18/10/2020 02:18

Where I live unless it’s harm to kids animals or the elderly , a rapist or paedo on the loose then you don’t grass on anyone, so no definitely not. Plus what if someone was to be pushed over the edge and heaven forbid commit suicide due to receiving a hefty fine. There’s no way I’d be having that on my conscience.
Plus Im too wrapped up in myself to have any clue what’s going on in my neighbours lives.
It’s all very well trying to be some kind of “hero” snivelling up to Boris and Matt by snitching.

However you’ll still have to live next to or opposite your neighbors long after the Pandemic is over and people don’t forget or forgive too quickly.

Torvean32 · 18/10/2020 02:30

My plan is to be 600 miles away staying in an awesome place in the middle of nowhere with just my dad.

My summer holiday with him was cancelled when flybe collapsed.

I've not seen any family all year.

This holiday is what's keeping me going.

Had I been at home I wouldnt report a few more ppl. But if it was a mass of ppl in the upstairs flat I think all 5 neighbours would report him. One of the most selfish , rude ppl I've met.

Defenbaker · 18/10/2020 02:49

No, not unless they were holding a massive party. Even then I'd think twice, because by the time the police turn up to enforce the rules and break the party up, most likely the damage would be done as they could have infected each other by then. Also, no point in raising the infection risk for the police -- they're struggling enough already.

I think the horrifying death rates during November might make people more cautious over Christmas. For the hard of thinking who insist on partying away like there's no pandemic, they'll just carry on regardless, competing for Darwin awards. It's a pity the reckless "it's my right to party with hoards of people" types can't be registered as "non compliant - low priority for NHS treatment".

sneakysnoopysniper · 18/10/2020 03:24

If you were really honest and cared about the need for compliance you would take the person on one side and point out that they were breaking the rules. People who snitch often take the moral high ground and say they are doing it for the public good. Rubbish. There is usually some ulterior motive such as a grudge, petty jealousy or the need for self aggrandisement as the expense of someone else.

There is an arrogance at the heart of snitching because you are setting yourself up as the moral guardian and interpreter of the rules on behalf of the entire community.

Snitching is the ultimate form of cowardice.

bengalcat · 18/10/2020 04:00

No - I don’t notice what my neighbours get up to and although I live in central London there’s never really any noise .

PolarBearStrength · 18/10/2020 04:25

There’ll likely be 7 of us at Christmas due to the fact my parents live with my brother and we’ll have two DC by then. I’ve sort of decided that a tiny baby really doesn’t count. I appreciate they do officially but she’ll be breastfed so we’ll basically have the same immune system anyway.

catwithflowers · 18/10/2020 04:41

Unless the rules are relaxed for Christmas, it will just be the two of us ☹️. We are in a tier 2 area like Crunchiemum and had hoped to have the kids for Christmas Eve and Day. We live in a small rural community, only a few houses, with mostly older people and we have all been following the rules.

The kids are working from home and have been really responsible too. But in answer to the OP's question, no, I wouldn't report anyone.

Tumbleweed101 · 18/10/2020 06:22

I wouldn’t notice tbh - one neighbour might report us though if we did as they are curtain twitchers through this pandemic!

In reality there’s a chance we could have 7, although they are all people in my support bubble. We won’t have anyone over who we’re not already in regular contact with even if the actual number of us is slightly over. There’s a chance it will be staggered anyway depending on who ends up working.

Guess we just need to see how things are by then.

FlippinNoah · 18/10/2020 06:54

What would Jesus do?

HeretoThereandBackAgain · 18/10/2020 06:59

I would. Because it’s all the selfish fuckers who couldn’t follow the rules at the beginning who've put us in this position now. They’ve destroyed Christmas for a lot of other people, myself included who now can’t travel to see loved ones.

Saracen · 18/10/2020 07:00

I wouldn't report. But I don't really know WHY I wouldn't report. I am in favour of most of the rules to limit the spread of the disease.

Maybe because I think some people are having a really hard time and Christmas is the only thing they have to look forward to?

I would consider reporting someone who had excessive numbers of visitors on a frequent basis, but I think not a one-off at Christmas.

Frdd · 18/10/2020 07:14

I’ll be sticking to the rules, which means I won’t be able to see one of my children and their family. And it’s my year to have them which only comes around one in four. (They do my house, their dad’s, her parents and a year on their own on a rotation and the year they’re at my ex’s I have them on Boxing Day).

So personally I’m gutted I’ll only have my youngest two with me, and potentially DD won’t get home from uni. It’s utterly shit. Ive had a really tough year with Major surgery and I’ve become disabled and I was really looking forward to Christmas.

I’ve not seen DS since February because of Covid.

I wouldn’t report my neighbours though.

Marieg10 · 18/10/2020 07:21

I'm as law abiding as they come and also live in an area that is in a tier with no households mixing. There is a change this time...people sick and tired of it. Where we are it has been totally driven by students who are getting 1-2 hours tuition (some online so don't even need to be here) being totally bored out of their skull so are getting together even when testing positive.

No one I know who is under 60 believes it will work and are totally ignoring it with the exception of self isolating if they have symptoms or test positive

Boris and Starmer do t have a clue except for different versions of lockdowns. Can't answer the obvious as to do we just keep having lockdowns then at least every two months?

jessstan1 · 18/10/2020 07:29

@FlippinNoah

What would Jesus do?
He'd go and talk to them :-), after which they would be persuaded to disperse.
Pixxie7 · 18/10/2020 07:39

Hopefully it won’t be an issue by then, one can hope.

IMNOTSHOUTING · 18/10/2020 07:39

@Saracen

I wouldn't report. But I don't really know WHY I wouldn't report. I am in favour of most of the rules to limit the spread of the disease.

Maybe because I think some people are having a really hard time and Christmas is the only thing they have to look forward to?

I would consider reporting someone who had excessive numbers of visitors on a frequent basis, but I think not a one-off at Christmas.

Basically this.

The reason I wouldn't report a few too many people though is that I don't think the way to get people to follow the rules is to turn into a society where neighbours report each other instead of help each other. I'd also worry that something was happening in their life I didn't know about.

I probably would report if one of my neighbours had an absolutely huge party though as that's just taking the piss.

Elsa8 · 18/10/2020 07:45

If they were clearly having a big party, yes I would. A few extra people for Christmas dinner, I wouldn’t.

Coldandwet123 · 18/10/2020 07:50

Absolutely not.
We're in Tier 2 and my neighboir had relatives indoors yesterday. I would never report that either. Im not sure what we've come to when people do this.

Bluntness100 · 18/10/2020 07:55

I wouldn’t report at any time, never mind Xmas. I don’t watch what my neighbours do and do not feel it’s any of my business. They are adults, can assess the risk and make their own decisions.

WanderingMilly · 18/10/2020 08:04

No. I wouldn't know and wouldn't care.
Only if they had 100 people dancing in the middle of the road to loud music, then probably yes. Otherwise, no.

literategiraffe · 18/10/2020 08:07

Unless it was a massive party I can't even imagine noticing to be honest! I'll be busy enough enjoying my own Christmas to be counting the visitors in and out of my neighbours houses.
Even if I did notice I'd not report them. I'm not the Stasi. If the gov wants to make sure everyone is keeping to the rules they can nip round themselves and do a headcount

Washimal · 18/10/2020 08:24

If they had a big party then yes, I would. But it wouldn't cross my mind to report anyone for having a couple of extra relatives over for Christmas dinner.