Partner would prefer I got the tube with my 5 year old rather pick us up by car to visit him.

[Lolly19842015]

Now I've never minded getting the tube to his and have done so from the beginning of our relationship but since the pandemic I've been scared to take my 5 year old on the tube and have asked him to pick us up. He has but not before suggesting the train every single time first. I feel bad asking him but I feel even worse thinking he doesn't care enough to pick us like it's such a big effort and he would rather spend an hour each way to get us on the train rather than drive 45 mins each way. Am I being unreasonable or does he just not care enough?

So many people telling the OP to learn to drive

It's quite possible she already has but doesn't own a car

Blimey my husband wouldn’t go down well with you guys. I don’t drive, he does, he’s retired and I’m still working. With the exception of lockdown when he drove me in a few times, (I work in nursing) I still go to and from work by train or sometimes bike. Does that make him a lazy arse?

@justasking111 Confused here when did a person constitute a partner when not living together I thought that was a boyfriend??

When one already has a child, there seems to be a need to confer a legitimacy to a relationship very quickly, hence “partner” rather than “boyfriend”.

@HollowTalk

If I were him I'd get into the car - I wouldn't want either of you to be on the tube or train if I could help him. You have a lazy arse there, OP.

The OP said he does come pick them up (45 min to her house, 45 min back to his, then presumably 45 min to her house, 45 min back to his), but he suggest the train. Even if her and her son stay a period of days, he's driving at least 1.5 hours to get her and bring her back to his place, 3 hours if it's all in the same day. I don't think that qualifies as lazy.

Just get the tube. There really is nothing to be scared of.

Lolz just get the train ! I wouldn’t ask my partner to collect me - what a waste of time

Tube is empty these days anyway

@DespairingHomeowner

I fee sadden that we still have this sort of attitude that females are some sort of helpless victims, who need strong men to deal with life.

@Cheeseandwin5 - not sure where you got that I think females are helpless creatures from - I’m certainly not. My point p, which I stand by, was that if someone won’t go out their way for you, that tells you a lot