To let 5 year old choose her own glasses frames?

[SaucyHorse]

Even though they're not really what DH and I would have chosen.

She wants ones that are pink and purple and quite rounded. I went with her to the shop and pretty much let her have free reign, but we also brought home a few other frames along with these on loan to try out. These are her first glasses and she is happy and excited about them.

If we were choosing, DP and I would pick the ones that are a more muted purple and more rectangular as we think they suit her face better. DP is frustrated with me for giving her the impression that it was completely her choice.

I was thinking that it is her face and that I want her to feel positive about her new glasses, so I'd like to just let her pick. But I do sort of see his point that maybe the frames will last a while and bright pink and purple might not be what her future self would pick. And perhaps we have some responsibility to guide her towards something that suits her face shape best? Whilst obviously still letting her have some input.

It's not like they are hideous at all, though.

Who IBU?

Are they good for her? Do they sit correctly, have right size, don’t rub behind the ears and are suitable for her lenses type? If yes, she chooses the colour.

Absolutely the glasses wearer should choose!

My DC has worn glasses since 3.5 and I've always let him choose. The only thing is at that age the fit is important so I am strict that they are sized correctly for his face. He is allowed to choose what he wants from a choice of properly fitting frames.
He's had glasses for 2 years now and weve been through countless pairs, they grow fast and their prescriptions change often so I wouldn't worry about what style she picks.

Definitely let kids pick as much as possible.

I still have a really vivid memory or turning up to primary school in year one or two and one of my friends had just been made to wear glasses, and she was stood sobbing so hard at the sinks because she was so sad/embarrassed that she had to wear glasses. It’s stayed with me forever, seeing her so distressed by it.

Let your DD pick her specs, anything to make it easier and more exciting for her.

Also, can you get her two pairs so she’s got the ones she wants, and the ones you and her dad like?

Wearing glasses is pants. Both my ds's disliked it, and had to have them from a very early age.

Definitely let her choose. Especially the first pair. I tried so hard to be positive about wearing them, but (behind closed doors, not that I ever let them know I felt this) let's be honest, it's shit!

Mine both had patching and frequent hospital visits aswell.

Have you ever seen the book ;

The mole who needed glasses.

Sweetest book ever. We read it a lot.

All four of us in this house wear glasses. We enjoy being able to see, so don't think wearing glasses is pants

Anyway, of course she must chose her own. I cannot believe you'd think otherwise.

I've worn glasses since I was 5 (38 now) and I've always chosen my own and I've picked some right belter in my time. She's got to wear them all the time and be happy and comfortable with them so let her choose.

DD always chooses her own. It’s her face!

@randomsabreuse

They don't need to last more than a year, I doubt her taste will change that much in a year.

I think you'll be lucky at 5 if they last a year. With DS we had to have at least two repairs / replacements each year and he was quite careful with them.

Let her choose - she’ll only have that frame for a year or so anyway (and will destroy it frequently- my youngest is on his 4th pair in 10
months). She needs to wear them every day, so it needs to be her choice

I would get her 3 pairs. The ones she likes and 2 sensible ones as she will likely break them and then you have spares

Go to specsavers and you get 2 pairs anyway. Then you pick one and let her pick one. This is what we did for our little one.

Of course let her choose.

@Oblomov20

Wearing glasses is pants. Both my ds's disliked it, and had to have them from a very early age.

Definitely let her choose. Especially the first pair. I tried so hard to be positive about wearing them, but (behind closed doors, not that I ever let them know I felt this) let's be honest, it's shit!

Mine both had patching and frequent hospital visits aswell.

Have you ever seen the book ;

The mole who needed glasses.

Sweetest book ever. We read it a lot.

Wearing glasses isn't shit. I wore contacts for ten years, from the age of 20 right up until lockdown, mostly for convenience so I could go to the gym after work, etc. I decided to save money and not buy any more lenses while I was working from home but I've found that I've actually enjoyed wearing glasses again!

I've not saved any money in the end because I just bought two new pairs of glasses they look really cool. It's not like we're all stuck with NHS jam jar specs anymore, they can be a great accessory.

Absolutely she should choose

I always let DS choose his glasses. This was back in the day when you had a voucher and I used to pay to top it up to the amount for the ones he chose. Wearing glasses is hard enough and I wanted him to like them and so he would wear them. It doesn't matter if you don't like them, the main thing is she does and she will wear them so her eyes do not deteriorate (which they will if she doesn't wear them). I think they sound really cute!

Like others, DD1 has worn glasses since 2 and a half; she is now 21. We were advised to get 2 pairs and I let her choose them. Yes, we had one pink pair and one purple pair. Many of them over the years have been purple. Every morning I would ask "which pair, pink or purple?' and she would choose.

She has always chosen her own frames. I just thought it was one battle I could not be bothered to fight. Now she is moving over to contact lenses and I'm not sure I like them because I am so used to her in glasses!

Assuming you are in the UK she will get a voucher for free glasses or money off a dearer pair; I direct ds to the "free" ranges and he gets a say from those. There seems to be a permanent "offer" to buy one get another pair for half price - the free pair count as the "buy one" - so we also choose a second pair for around £10-20 and that's Mum or Dads choice!

I've worn glasses since I was 2 as well and always been allowed to choose my own frames (I assume I was steered away from the most expensive ones but have no recollection of it !). When I was about 7 I chose green and white ones with daisies down the arms that I thought were the bees knees.

I spend a lot on glasses now and have several to choose from (currently wearing two tone bright purple ones). Glasses are a significant part of your appearance if you wear them all the time, they should be something you like to wear in my view

I'd stop short of novelty frames or frames which will become uncomfortable over time but other than that I'd just let her have whatever makes her feel good about wearing glasses.

Also if she can get a free or discounted second pair I'd recommend prescription sunglasses. Being able to see properly when it was bright was an absolute revelation as a child when I finally got some.

I always let my 3 girls pick theirs, even when they started wearing them aged 3, we've had some extra way out there bright ones, but they loved them & when they're the ones wearing them they have to like them.

Definitely let her choose.

DS has glasses and was really distressed about the idea, as another child had been teased at school. If you let them choose they'll feel more confident and more likely to wear. As we needed some really tough, hardy glasses, that was our basic criteria, but after that it was his choice. Tip - we found that the glasses that 'magically' turn into sunglasses (photochromic lenses) helped DS (then 5) think his were incredibly cool, and he hates having sun in his eyes so helped that too. All his friends were amazed by his 'magic' glasses and even jealous.

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