How to tell SIL I'm pregnant

[UnicornAndSparkles]

Not really an AIBU but posting here for traffic (I presume that is allowed??)

Im pregnant with my second child. Sooner or later DH and I need to tell my SiL, his DS. She has been having fertility issues and has struggled to conceive for a couple of years. Covid halted her fertility treatment. I can only imagine what she is going through and want to tell her our news as gently as possible. It was somewhat of a suprise pregnancy for us so SiL won't be expecting our news. DH thinks we can just announce in the family WhatsApp group but I think this is insensitive and I need to somehow prepare SiL. Any advice? I dont feel especially comfortable phoning her as I think this puts her on the spot.

Itsabeautifuldayheyhey

Trying / not trying isn't really a question that anyone should ask esp not to an adult woman living in her own house.

You sound quite unsympathetic to the DSIL who's trying for a baby.
Understand that the moment a couple decide to TTC, a baby is formed in their minds. They get excited and look forward to the child in their life, the things they will do and the fun they will have.
When it takes longer than expected there is a feeling of limbo will it happen , won't it happen, the ups and downs hope fertility treatments give, the grief, a real hard grief for that the baby you formed in your mind and dreamt about isn't coming. Time goes on but you stand still in limbo.
It's a kick in the teeth when someone else jumps the que, it's not your not happy for the other person it's a reminder of why not me, when's my turn and nobody can answer that.

I did eventually get my baby but will never forget that lonely time in limbo.

@Bikingbear

I wouldn't put pity in the text. No need for comments like 'you don't need to reply' 'prior warning' 'you might be upset' etc.

If you really feel you want to acknowledge her struggles I'd word it as
'Hi SiL, How are things going?, Just wanted to let you know your going to be an Auntie or let you know we are due a baby in x month's

If she replies I'd maybe answer by 'I hope you get pregnant soon'

Please don't say I hope you eat pregnant soon. Very patronising though I'm sure the poster means if kindly.

Get, not eat, obviously. Stupid iPad.