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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

AIBU-I know I am but WWYD. Covid/work related

97 replies

BowtieBling · 30/09/2020 00:54

One week into self isolation as member of household tested positive.
Boss wants me back in work.
I know I should've said no but I was chicken shit. I went in. He's said it's good that I'm back, asked if I'm well.
I am fine. Tested negative after slight temperature last week BUT I should not be in work. I should be isolated for 14 days from onset of symptoms.

So now what?
I'm feeling like such an idiot for not standing up to him. I've gone against the rules and potentially put others at risk.
The only saving grace is that I work in a room alone and haven't left that space.
The boss came in though and has then presumably mixed with everyone else.

I don't know what to do tomorrow.
Can I refuse to go in? Is it too for me to pull it back now or have I already burst that bubble by agreeing to go in?

OP posts:
NorthernBirdAtHeart · 30/09/2020 00:58

Phone them in the morning and tell them your family member has tested positive and you now need to self isolate for 14 days. I can’t believe you actually went in knowing you’ve been in contact with someone who’s positive?! 🤷‍♀️

Mmsnet101 · 30/09/2020 01:14

Just tell them you've realised you were breaking the law going in and don't want your employer to get a hefty fine by you doing so.

If you work in an office surely you could have done some work from home?

Newjez · 30/09/2020 01:56

It really shouldn't be that hard to follow the simple rules should it? This should be bleedingly obvious. You don't go in.

lunar1 · 30/09/2020 02:00

You stay home, why do you even need to ask.

Ghosts2020 · 30/09/2020 02:04

Agree with above, you shouldn't have gone in knowing a member of your household is positive. Do you understand how many tests are defunct and this is coming from an individual working in the covid field. Please remain off and point your boss to the relevant guidelines.

Frannibananni · 30/09/2020 02:09

Did you tell him all of this?

JKRowlingIsMyQueen · 30/09/2020 02:45

I'm literally so confused with these rules. The same thing happened to my friend today, he came in to contact with someone positive, got tested, is negative. But according to the NHS app he does not have to isolate because he has tested negative.

NerrSnerr · 30/09/2020 02:50

@JKRowlingIsMyQueen it's not confusing. If someone in your household tests positive you need to isolate for 2 weeks regardless of test because if she gets a negative test early on the the fortnight she may still get Covid after the test has been done.

cuparfull · 30/09/2020 03:09

@Mmsnet101

Just tell them you've realised you were breaking the law going in and don't want your employer to get a hefty fine by you doing so.

If you work in an office surely you could have done some work from home?

Blinking heck...A negative test early on does not indicate you don't have Covid.... Three days later it may be positive.

Your boss is a dick does he want a fine?
You know the rules, work from home.

Mummyoflittledragon · 30/09/2020 03:20

I don’t know which way I’m supposed to vote. But you need to isolate and tell your boss going in is against the law. Did you get asked by text / email / phone? Did you inform them by test / email / phone how you informed them of the positive test. Just asking if there is any kind of paper trail to support you in case of someone at work testing positive as a result of not following the rules.

Raisingawolfpack · 30/09/2020 04:49

They brought in fines for companies who allow/force staff to work who should be shielding on the 28th September..... I would both tell your boss you won't break the law and explain his risk of a fine as well!

AlternativePerspective · 30/09/2020 05:08

And people blame the government for the fact that the figures are rising, rather than the idiots who don’t give a shit and go out regardless. Angry

If we go back into lockdown it will be the fault of people like you you and only you are responsible for the fact you went into work and have probably infected a dozen or so people into the bargain. Well done.

It’s one thing taking minor risks by meeting up with people when nobody is infected, deliberately mixing with someone with COVID and then going out to spread it around is quite another.

miled · 30/09/2020 05:18

Are you able to work from home?

Wondering why your boss is so keen to have you back.

If you can find the new/existing rules copy and share with your boss.

Seriously though it was your choice to go in, you are responsible for your actions. I really hope nobody has to pay the price for this. Other staff members and their families are now at risk, you put them all in this situation and they don't know it. Plead stupidity and let them know. I'm sure your family member who tested positive wishes the person they got it from had stayed away. Go do the right thing

Fallpoetry · 30/09/2020 05:20

Think people are being a bit harsh on OP when really it's the boss who is in the wrong here. Not everyone is in a position to say no to their employer, even when the law is on their side.

miled · 30/09/2020 05:33

Just to add, my family have suffered loss because of COVID-19. Possibly it could of been avoidable if others had just followed a very simple rule and stay at bloody home. Something so simple could of prevented a lot of pain and suffering not just for my family but many many others. I hope someone reading this who is in 2 minds about what to do stops and thinks about the consequences of their actions.

supersonicginandtonic · 30/09/2020 05:39

@Fallpoetry I don't think they are. She's an adult not a child and if the boss is putting pressure on her to break the law then she should be pointing this out.
I would be furious if one of my colleagues did this. What about other people in the office who may be vulnerable or have vulnerable family members?
The rules are there for a reason and they need to be followed.

miled · 30/09/2020 05:48

Fallpoetry - come on, you can't be serious. OP I'm assuming is a grown up and is responsible for their own actions. Just like when they get in a car for example, the buck falls completely with them. OP has the government rules to over rule her boss on this one. I understand standing up to a boss can be extremely difficult, but they are breaking the law. Maybe use some of the isolation time wisely and find a different job.

Undercovermuvver · 30/09/2020 05:54

Perhaps the OP is worried they will not get paid. For some families, that’s half a salary......
,

feathermucker · 30/09/2020 05:57

Bloody hell!!

Of course you shouldn't have gone in. Irrespective of the negative test last week, the person who tested positive was also last week, so symptoms wouldn't have had time to develop at that point.

At the end of the day, YOU had the chance to say no. If your boss took action against you based on your refusal, then you have an excellent legal case.

It isn't harsh to tell the OP she should have said no!!!!

Bowerbird5 · 30/09/2020 06:05

Someone I know from church has had it probably caught it from someone he works with as he works with vulnerable adults and in a care home.

He is early forties and cannot walk a hundred yards. He is still having breathing difficulties and struggles to have a conversation. They have a group. He was a young, fit parent. He doesn’t know if he will recover. I saw him six weeks after.
Please do NOT go in. You could be spreading it. Stand up to your boss. I know that isn’t easy but you could be leaving someone with life long problems. We are hearing about positive cases, people that have sadly died but we are not hearing about the fit , healthy people that are not recovering and may never work again.

Think!

Raisingawolfpack · 30/09/2020 06:09

Anyone who is having to self isolate due to close contact with a positive person is entitled to sick pay, even if they're not actually unwell at that point themselves.

As another poster said if you can work from home great, if that's not possible it's sick pay, though I realise for some statutory sick pay isn't much if their company won't or doesn't enhance it.

Raisingawolfpack · 30/09/2020 06:15

Employers who force or allow staff to come to work when they should be self-isolating will also be liable for fines of up to £10,000, sending a clear message that this will not be tolerated.

www.gov.uk/government/news/new-legal-duty-to-self-isolate-comes-into-force-today

This is the latest gov summary of changes.... Hope this helps. I completely understand the pressure of work and not wanting to lose your job. But it is important everyone follows the rules.

Friendsoftheearth · 30/09/2020 06:24

OP, discounting the fact you actually went in when you should not have done. I would send an email to your manager today outlining the government advice, and you will not be breaking the law under any circumstances, and the pressure he is putting on you is unacceptable.

I would offer to work from home, and assist in other ways once the isolation period is over, but I would not go in again.

I blame him not you, it is totally irresponsible to put employees under so much pressure to work in this situation.

Aridane · 30/09/2020 06:26

Jesus - how can 1 in 5 people think OP is reasonable to go into work when a family member has Covid-19? If I did that, I would be fired on the spot

Greenglassteacup · 30/09/2020 06:34

No wonder he virus is raging again. I wonder how many people are doing this.

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