To ask what's the loveliest thing a partner has done for you

[Songsofexperience]

Struggling a little bit at the moment. So many posters -too many- seem to have had bad experiences in their relationships. I'd like to believe there's hope out there. Please restore my faith in humanity!

Years ago we went through a time when we were on the bones of our arses. No money at all. We were watching tv and someone in tv had fish and chips. After seeing that it was all I could think about but as we couldn’t afford it there was no chance. Later that day my husband shut himself in the kitchen. He emerged later and had made me dinner. He’d gone to Tesco and bought a cheap piece of fish,made some chips and cooked frozen peas and mashed them with a fork! It was just the kindest thing to do. I have no idea what kind of fish it was. Might have been a goldfish but it didn’t matter! He’s not a romantic type at all. He never buys me birthday presents or anniversary cards but he does these adorable things once in a while that show me that he does care. I’ll never forget it.

My late DH an I use to love a poggle round the shops on Saturdays. Once I saw a lovely necklace and earring set in the local jewelers. Red, heart shaped Murano glass. I think all I sai was "Oh that's lovely" an we walked on.

I used to travel a lot for work. A couple of weeks later I am in my foreign hotel and I open up my suitcase. On top is a box with the set in it.

I still have it and wear it on very special occasions.

Sorry I have a problem with the "D" on my keyboard atm

On our second date, I picked him up in my car , the next day he came to my work in he morning and asked for my car keys as he wanted to do some maintenance on it.

Picked me up from work later that day and he had bought me four news tyres, and had given it a service and but on new break pads. At that point I new he was a keeper.

He said he did not care if I dump him the next day he just could not have me driving around in a car that he thought was not safe.

He has been a lovely caring husband

When I was in a lot of pain from episiotomy and ventouse delivery he bought some gel pad things from Mothercare which you freeze and put in your underwear to reduce swelling and bruising. I didn’t even know they existed and certainly wouldn’t have believed he would have searched the shelves for something to try and help me. They were the best things he ever bought me . They made such a difference, dragging me out of my constant low level misery from the discomfort. Ah the sweet relief!

Similarly, as soon as I got home from the hospital he really looked after me, doing everything, telling me to put my feet up and he would do all the cooking and changing nappies etc and bring baby to me to save me from moving around too much, which was very painful as I hadn’t been able to rest much in hospital so hadn’t started to heal properly I don’t think. He made me poached egg on toast for lunch an hour after getting on home (tasted so nice after the hospital food) and brought me cups of tea and chocolaye biscuits.

I just felt so cared for it made all the difference to my mental health which had been wobbly during the 5 day hospital post birth where I felt pretty much abandoned by the staff and left to get on with it all on my own despite my pain down below, in my leg from phlebitis, scabby excruciating nipples, a 32 hour birth and no sleep for 3 days. (And they forgot to deliver me a meal one day )

I’ll never forget the difference between the “care” I got in hospital and what DH did for me when I got home. It’s the little things which make all the difference to a great experience post birth and at such a life-changing moment.

Agreed to have a 3rd and 4th child because it meant so much to me. Fortunately he has no regrets!!!

Our marriage has had some really dark times but it's mainly the little things...

After 20 years he now regularly brings me a morning cuppa in bed.

When the DC little if I'd taken them out for the day/a few hours/weekend I would come back to a clean and tidy house, and he would swoop in and take over.

My husband does lovely things every day, especially now that I am 35 weeks pregnant. He does the wash up, puts DD to bed, gives me little kisses as he passes. But the best thing he has ever done for me was during lockdown. My parents live abroad and when everyone started back seeing their family I was facing 2 more months til I saw mine, so he organised that my parents made a plaster cast of their hands. He said it was so I could hold their hands whenever I wanted. It is my most prized possession.

Nobody has ever topped that for me.

When our DC were small I started thinking about starting my own business. The idea had a lot going for it but it was risky and I was the main breadwinner.

DH gave me all his support. He kept telling me I was brilliant at what I did and that the business would be a success. And he was right. Within a few years I was making enough to allow him to resign from the low paid job he hated. I would never have made a success of it without him.

All those months with him picking up the slack with everything else as I worked 80 hour weeks for peanuts trying to get the business off the ground. A couple of years of economic uncertainty. All those lonely evenings. I never heard a whisper of doubt. He had far more faith in me than I had in myself.

On a different note, when we first got together he decorated a bicycle with fairy lights and hung it on my bedroom wall. Magical.

My DH wholeheartedly supported and encouraged me to follow my dream and go to university. On the day I found out I had a place he took me out for dinner and bought me a ton of stationary. (Which is the best gift ever!)

He is an incredible father and its fascinating for me to watch as its not something I had growing up.

Everything.

I never imagined a relationship could be this happy.

I'm not too bad health wise but I sometimes get a bad back or pull a muscle and am currently still feeling the effects of a bad sciatica attack where I was screaming in pain. It was months ago and my leg is still numb/painful and my toes feel like they're frozen. DH will give me a massage whenever I ask because he knows it takes the pain away for a while.

When we brought DC3 home from the hospital DH popped the Moses basket at his side of the bed. When I asked why as I was BFing, he said, "Well I can soothe him while you get yourself sat up and comfy, then I can pass him to you"
It's that sort of kindness and thoughtfulness he shows all the time.

In fact, as I type this, he's just walked in the bedroom with a coffee for me!

Our son is exactly like his daddy. Always thinking of others. If someone offers him a sweet, he takes three and gives one to each of his sisters. He always asks if there's anything we need. He jumps in front of fighting friends and says, "Whoa lads, don't fight. Let's sort this out!". He stands up for the picked on kids on the park. He'll find a lonely child and go sit with them.

So that's the best thing my partner has ever done. He gave me three children just as wonderful and kind as him.

@LetsPlayAGame20

He makes me tea at the drop of a hat because one pet hate I have is making a cuppa.. I would rather go without than make my own tea, no idea why.
It's a joke now that that's his job to do.

So it's not just me then. I'll wait til DH gets home at 8pm to get my daily cuppa because it's not the same if I try and make it. I do make up for him being chief brew maker by doing stuff for him though. But yeah, it's his job, not mine.

I can give my partner a pretty hard time (and there are a lot of times when he deserves it..!) but in terms of lovely things, it’s the lots of little thoughtful things that I treasure the most - this morning he gave me the lie in and when he heard me getting up he re-boiled the kettle so it was hot for my morning coffee.

As said above lots of wonderful small gestures, but the one that means the most is supporting me both financially and emotionally with my horses.

sorry nothing, they all just took never gave.

My dp gave me flowers and a card after my mums memorial service saying I had done an amazing job and mum would have been proud of me.
Lost of support through shock and grief and funeral and all the exhausting planning etc but that message after a huge thing was over was really thoughtful - have kept the card. Look at it every now and then when I can’t quite even believe mum died and what that whole period was like.

Aww this is such a lovely thread.

My DH is an absolute legend, he really is, such a kind and thoughtful bloke.

Last week was a perfect example, although it's to do with our pets, not directly for me. One of our dogs has had an operation, and couldn't have walks for a couple of days. When we were out with our other dogs, DH spent time rummaging around for things to take back to Ddog for a sniff. We had a couple of pinecones, a small stick, a conker, and a little "joined together" clump of leaves, so that Ddog didn't feel like he'd missed out on the walk!

He's a keeper.

carriemoonbeams I hope you don’t mind my saying I think I love him. What an absolute lovely thing.

My Mom died 150 miles away from where I live, and I was with her at the end, totally distraught. My DH drove those 150 miles to me, gave me a cuddle, had a cup of tea then drove back - straight into a 12 hr day shift.
I love that man sooooo much

We’re together 30 years, he’s an absolute keeper.

I know he loves me, there has never been a moment of doubt in my mind. Like others, it is the consistency of his care and thoughtfulness. I’m the planner in the family, I do think about the future - he lives in the here and now. It’s the perfect combination to be honest. We are and have always been equal parents to our kids, equal adults in our responsibilities and equal in our relationship.

He is romantic and always remembers special occasions, it might not be a huge gesture but anniversaries and birthdays are always a treat.

For me, if I were to highlight 3 things they would be

1. His absolute support and believe in my professional ability, giving me the mental and physical space to succeed when it is needed.
2. He is an amazing father, our sons have his kindness in buckets and for that I feel blessed.
3. He is the best listener, always has been but was we’ve grown together it’s been even better as he doesn’t try to ‘fix’ stuff for me - he listens deeply and somehow that helps me solve my own stuff. That’s an odd one I suppose but for me it’s magic.

His core values are kindness, humour and fun. What’s not to love!

HeronLanyon (sorry, can't do bolding), I don't mind at all, he is an absolute smasher. I told him what you said and he asked me to pass on his fondest regards to you!

We've been together for over 40 years and we have such a laugh together. I overheard one of our friends talking to someone else about us, he said "when God made them, He matched them". So true. We're old now, and creaky, and a bit fat, but we still think the world of each other.

Trade me in for a younger, prettier accountant

I've been single since then - around 10 years - and I bloody love it

EVERYTHING! He is honestly the most thoughtful person in the world. I am so lucky to have him, and he is the best father too. I love him

So many things. Always makes me tea in the morning. Always does the popping to the shops thing. Always offers to drive so I can have a drink. Never judges me if I've been a bit of a twat after too many drinks... Makes me laugh. Humours me. Tolerates my faults far better than I cope with his. Constantly asks 'do you need anything?' Makes sure I'm warm and comfortable. Lives with me. Tells me he loves me. Tries to make me happy. Lets me choose the channel and the music more often than he should. Is the most generous person in so many ways. Remembers special occasions and plans for them. Tries really hard not to make too much mess when he cooks (fails but tries!). I wonder if I do enough little things that make him feel cared for and loved...

1001 little things.

He’s not one for grand gestures but got up in the middle of last night to find me my painkillers (I’m recovering from surgery). He’s brought me breakfast in bed and is walking my dog for me.

After 36 years he’s a keeper

Helping me with my catheter after giving birth. Didnt blink twice. Being kind all the time. He is lovely