If you struggled financially at one point and are now in a better place...

[champagnesupernovainthesky]

Does it feel weird sometimes when you're food shopping and don't have to count every single penny anymore?

I'm in a much better situation financially now than a few years ago due to no longer being with DP and his financial abuse but from time it still feels weird to not be trailing the supermarket worrying about what to buy!?

Does anyone else have this?! Its almost like I shouldn't be looking at some things in the shop!

I don’t think I will ever relax in a supermarket, I still have to check my bank balance before I offload at the checkout. It is always such a relief when my card is ‘approved’.

I am recently earning good money from a new business but it is too early to be able to relax financially. Last weekend I bought my son a MacBook Pro, i was so elated at being able to do that for him, it felt such an achievement after all we have been through (bankruptcy etc).

Yes. Old habits die hard.

yes a few years ago i was at rock bottom financially and £15 a week was my total amount for feeding myself each week, now i can buy what ever i want, i shop in aldi because its cheaper than asdas and still go OMG how much have i spent on food it still feels weird but i dont think about it for too long

Yes, many years ago I was a single parent of four children, I had to live off benefits for most of the time until the youngest was at school and I could get a job, it was very hard. But they all grew up healthy and are now settled with children of their own and I am re-married. I do online shopping and I'm all the time adding things then taking them off again so I don't spend too much even though I can afford them.

Yes. To the point that I even stopped getting embarrassed about not having enough money at checkout and having to put things back.

There's no shame in being skint. I also became adamant about saving - just squirrelling a bit whenever you can. Because if you have to borrow to pay for something, it will always cost you double. I would save like mad then buy outright for the best price I could find. (Fridge, washing machine, whatever.)

Yes, old habits die hard. I still can shop/buy something without checking my bank balance, it was regularly declined years ago and now we're in a good place I still have that fear of it declining again despite knowing I have more than enough in the account

Yes, I often feel a bit like Cinderella.

I can remember working on a checkout at the weekends while I was still at school and the dignity of the women I served (it was always women) buying the family groceries and having to put things back that they could afford until the total dropped to what they had in cash.

I hope the advent of cheaper supermarkets like Aldi & Lidl make it a bit easier for people, it was hard as a teenager to see how some people struggle (my family had money struggles - but my DM was extremely resourceful and was able to grow a lot of our food so we always ate well).

Yup. I had 2 lattes from Gregg's today! 2 takeaway coffees in the same day!

Yep. Very odd not to be at the end /my overdraft and not looking for reduced items only...
Still love a bargain!

Yes. I can afford to buy whatever I want but I still walk around the supermarket adding up in my head as I go, to the cent. I still check online banking before I go to checkout.

We struggled for years, counting every penny. The one thing that has never left us is that we still feel sick if the car makes a funny noise. We will never forget how we felt when we couldn’t afford to repair our old banger

Yes.

I’ve turned into a bit of a low-key prepper. Never catch me going short of pasta or loo roll, and not just for Brexit/Boris/zombies.

Yes. DH does most of the food shopping but he's no longer pinching pennies. We do like to splash out a bit for the kids too. We had lobster (much cheaper here) right before DS left for uni.

I am weird.
I have just had to shell out £850 to get my car through its MOT (ripped off when I bought it, but thats another story).
I paid £6.5 k for my dog to have surgery.

Didn't blink.

But I cannot, for the life of me, spend money on clothes- I still only buy from charity shops. I could not bring myself to buy a magazine - have you seen the price of them??
And as for having a coffee, unless I am out with friends, I wait until I get home and have a 'free' one.

I definitely look after the pennies........ its the pounds that escape me😁

I always have money at the end of the month which gives me a sense of pride. Not a lot but in the past, I’d run out of money in the first week after payday!

Yes. I bought two jumpers today (will likely send one back) but there's enough spare in my account I can do this without worrying.

I also get twitchy that my card will be declined even though the money is there.

I still remember many years ago having a fiver to last me the week and going round Kwik Save totting everything up. Even though DH and I now have a v comfortable lifestyle I still compare prices/switch energy providers/ buy reduced stuff. You're right it never goes away. It's really hard to appreciate that anxiety if you've never been on the bones of your arse.

It's weird because if I go shopping, I get what I want and I don't have to worry. But, I avoid going because I do this and I still feel guilty about spending money, and I do still worry regardless. My husband sticks to a list so when he goes he will spend £30. I go with the same list and spend £50!

I head straight for the yellow stickered section. I also head straight for the sale rail in clothes shops.

Same. I used to horde supermarket card points like a demon when I was a student, so I knew I'd still be able to eat at the end of term. No backup possible from home. When I got divorced I couldn't afford to keep my house and my salary was very low. I just about kept myself going. I can't shake the bargain hunting habits and it drives DH mad if I chose cheapo baked beans/cereal/crisps! It has made me very appreciative of what I've got now, although I do panic sometimes that it'll get taken off me. I have a good job and I worked damn hard to get there. I'm a good saver too.

Yes, I still have huge guilt at spending money, even on food.

Somebody (can't remember who) talked about the long tutelage of poverty. It never leaves you and even though I'm way more financially comfortable I really struggle to spend money on anything really - often find myself in Aldi and Primark for the bargains.

Yes I still think ‘I can’t afford it...’ I usually buy cheap shoes and boots as it’s all I can afford. I treated myself to some decent timberland leather boots and better trainers and my feet, legs, hips and back all thank me.

Yup. 10 years ago I was living with exh, mortgaged up to the eye balls (interest only mortgage). He got made redundant and I was working crazy long hours to support us and our 2 dc on one salary. I went without food for most days for 6 months. Even when exdh found work (only part time) he was so irresponsible with money that we always ran out. It was always down to me to budget and I frequently had to chose between fuel in the car, kids haircuts, night our with friends, eating etc. My head was constantly busy with totalling things up.

10 years later I’m divorced and re-married. Have a lovely big house and tiny mortgage. Both Dh and I work full time on reasonable salary. We aren’t rich, but I no longer have to spend all my time adding stuff up in my head , or feeling anxious that I couldn’t afford a new pair of school shoes or birthday present.

When you’ve been poor it never leaves you.