At my wits end. Can't afford nursery. No toddler groups.

[lasangoles]

My toddler is nearly two. He's an absolute nutter (words of the childminder, not me!) and doesn't do well without social interaction. Not a chance I could stay at home with him all day regularly and he needs to run about and let off steam. We do have a garden but it's out of action and will be for a while as we have a dangerous tree that's being removed soon then work being done which will take weeks. I'd like to book him in to a day of nursery every week, but can't afford it. It would cost me an extra 250 a month which isn't possible. There are absolutely no available toddler groups near me that a) are running or b) aren't booked up for the term. I booked him in to a baby dance class and it was a disaster. He needs something sensory, that's less structured. On our local council website, there are 40 different groups listed, 35 are closed due to covid, the other 5 are booked up for months.

I'm at the end of my tether. I just want a weekly something I can do with him where he can interact with other kids and benefit from some sensory learning. The only other kids at the cm are older than him.

Any suggestions?

my sons nursery is £20 a day £80 a month ...

HOW can they afford to pay staff wages, pay bills and utilities and all the extras the children need for £20 A DAY?
Even if you have to pay extra for food and nappy, HOW is that even possible?

Do you use your tax free childcare allowance for the childminder?

Is there a local mums Facebook group (so sexist sorry!), our council's list of playgroups is terrible, all the local toddler groups advertise on the Facebook group instead. There are lots of groups running once you find them!

Trampoline parks are open and having toddler sessions
Soft play
Do meet ups in playparks

Just make a timetable for him, every morning take him out to the park, soft play, woodland walk/run collecting sticks and leaves, friends and playdates, join the church groups they are always very good. After lunch do something quieter, crafts and story time.

I split the day in two and it worked for me at the toddler stage. They need to burn energy and exercise.

Have you tried ruggerbugs? That’s quite a loose format and more about play and motor skills than rugby at this age.

As much as you love the childminder, could you swap to a nursery instead of a childminder? That way he is with lots of children and you aren't paying extra.

I do sympathise OP because none of the church groups around here are running, and aren't we all supposed to still be social distancing so playdates are a no-no.

Definitely check out a preschool, if nothing else they are generally paid for over a term so you can spread the cost easier, and ours which is charity run will appeal to the parish council to part fund if you are experiencing hardship.

I feel your pain OP, all the playgroups, libraries and lots of other toddler groups are closed here too. Preschools are worth looking at, cheaper than nurseries and some take from 2yo. We've managed to meet friends in the park but that's been about it so far. It's very frustrating.

I echo what others have said about a pre school, they are cheaper than a nursery and he could go for a morning or afternoon.
The trampoline park near us is still open and has a toddler session. Also try googling forest schools, there is one near me that does stay and play sessions. Does he like swimming? Some pools have reopened now.

I would think twice before having any more dc if you are struggling with one, as it becomes much more of a juggle in general when you have newborns/older siblings in the mix.

This is really quite mean. Woman wants her toddler to socialise with kids his own age and is struggling because Covid has cut down the number of options somehow translates to “is struggling” with a suggestion she shouldn’t have any more kids.

If you can’t find anything at the moment I’d make sure you go to a park where there are likely to be similar aged kids. It doesn’t need to be a formal group for him to interact with others
Also what about swimming? Again, doesn’t need to be lessons, just go for a splash around.

@friendsoftheearth is that a joke? I'm a lone parent struggling in the middle of a pandemic. My job has been affected which has left me financially screwed. I don't think this should be any reflection on whether I should have any more children.

I am shocked there is a nursery that only charges £20 a day? Is that a 9-3 type one Im guessing? Even so thats very cheap.
Round here a full 7-6 type nursery is around £55, but there are some term time only nurseries 9-3 which you can pay by the hour, about £5 an hour with a minimum of a day a week or something.

Op, do you work on the days he goes to a childminder? Could you do an extra day at work and send him to the childminder that day to stop you both going crazy?

How about taking him to a swimming lesson? Not exactly free play but would use up some time. I hope you find something as must be hard with that aged child and so much being shut.

It wasn’t even £20 a day 12 years ago when mine were in nursery....

Do you use tax free childcare? I think you would probably be eligible

@Friendsoftheearth

I would think twice before having any more dc if you are struggling with one, as it becomes much more of a juggle in general when you have newborns/older siblings in the mix.

what a bizarre thing to say

Why not do an extra day at the childminder?

At the moment you're not supposed to use more than one childcare setting unless necessary, so a nursery or playgroup may not take him.

@jesskerm I don't, I am on universal credit instead as you can't use both. This worked out to be the better option.

@Friendsoftheearth

I would think twice before having any more dc if you are struggling with one, as it becomes much more of a juggle in general when you have newborns/older siblings in the mix.

This is both a nasty comment and a weird one - OP hasn't even said she wants more children? Did you just want to let us all know that you win the 'who has/had it harder' competition?

Oh gosh I feel so sorry for you, I know at that stage the toddler groups in church halls (normally 50p/£1 a session) were a godsend to keep my crazy child entertained, I hadn't thought they wouldn't be able to run due to covid restrictions.

Are you in touch with any of your antenatal group? Arrange coffee/play dates at yours, someone for your dc to play with would be good while you have an adult to talk to. As much as possible, take him out to parks, there will be other parents doing the same.

Its a hard age, but it does get easier.

You could try asking your local council what's available, ours has a massive list of pre-school groups etc.

Any outdoor football groups for little ones...I've seen toddler football clubs advertised near me. Usually at weekends in parks.

Switch from the cm to a nursery
Apply for two year funding, you might be eligible, it costs nothing to apply
Use tax free childcare to pay for your nursery fees, the government will pay 20% of your fees

It’s so hard, I’m dreading winter with a toddler and I can’t pretend, I’m lucky she goes to nursery a few days a wk.
The only child activity open near us is trampoline parks with a morning toddler hr