People commenting on crying baby

[EmilyDoesntKnowHerStuff]

First time poster, I’ve been lurking since my daughter was born 18 months ago.
First year of motherhood was very challenging for me, DD was very difficult (she wouldn’t feed, nap, sleep at night, inconsolable pretty much most of the time!) and I suffered awful PND, which I finally got help for and thankfully these last 6 months have been amazing. Don’t get me wrong, DD can still be a nightmare and she still doesn’t sleep well, but I’m really enjoying it now. I only mention this as it might be relevant to my post... I’m not sure if it’s left me a bit over sensitive!
But anyway, whenever I’m out with DD and she has a meltdown, I find so many people feel the need to stare or comment. Just things like “oh dear, someone’s not very happy” or “oh dear look at those tears” etc in that sympathetic (patronising) tone, but I find it so frustrating! I find it bad enough that she’s having a meltdown without random people unhelpfully highlighting to me that they can also see/hear the performance. Sometimes I’m close to tears myself and comments really don’t help. I’m getting better at semi-smiling (grimacing) and just walking quickly away, but it still really annoys me! Can people not just try and pretend they haven’t heard and carry on walking!? AIBU?

I say things like this but only because I thought it would make the mother feel better, knowing that I'm friendly enough to chat and not judging them etc

I used to get this all the time with DS. He was a grumpy baby (looking back and knowing that he has IBS now, I suspect he had belly ache a lot!) and I really just had to let it go over my head.

I would regularly take him for walks and he would be crying (having been fed, winded, changed etc) and people would often comment. As it was my second baby I guess I was much more relaxed about things and I'd just do a bright and breezy "oh he's fine, been fed and changed, he's just a grumpy so and so!" I don't think people mean anything by it, they are just empathising with your struggle as they've probably been through it themselves.