To ask how you cope with aging?

[malificent7]

So I am only 42 but wanting botox. In many ways I feel more comfortable in my skin but I am sad that it may be too late to have another baby ( not sure I want anothet but would be good to have the option.)
Also I wish I looked like the beautiful young girls I worked with ...but with my knowledge now!
Yes, i know the patriarchy makes us fear aging so how do i embrace it?

Because it is better than the alternative

I’m also in the DGAF category but I pretty much always have been! Haven’t worn makeup since mid teens except my wedding but that was for the photos (22 years ago!).

But I’m also far from the stereotype of feminine. Definitely a woman though.

Im 51, Im trying to age gracefully but Im lost in what that even means now. 🤣

I'm turned 42 last week - as my beautiful friend Louise, who I shared a birthday with, should have done. Sadly she was diagnosed with Non-Hodgekins Lymphoma in 2010 and didn't make it to our 32nd birthday.

So, whenever I'm tempted to get depressed by the ageing process, I think of her, and how desperately she wanted to be allowed the privilege of growing older. The wrinkles and grey hair don't seem so bad then.

My mum dropped dead at 40 completely unexpectedly. She had a fear of getting old and was constantly worried about looking ‘old’.

I’m now 42 and decided a long time ago to look as nice as I can for me but embrace all the positives there are about being older.

Get Botox, fillers etc if you want to but they’re a sticking plaster.

I just don’t see ‘old’ as bad.

Short of winning a million k on the lottery to repair all of the ageing damage i just have to lump it.
I just make sure I never do certain things, like looking downwards onto a mirrored surface for example - basset hound. Can put me on a downer all day.

Some great advice on here thank you...and sad stories too.

Well I did have a baby at 43! I am ok with ageing. I don't want to look younger. I just try to look good for my age.

Honestly? I don't think about it. I'm developing seriously long vision with age so if I'm not wearing my glasses my reflection isn't that different to me at 30. Life's too short to spoil half of it worrying you don't look young enough.

Questa I missed your post, I see I'm not the only one!

@BlueThistles

Im 51, Im trying to age gracefully but Im lost in what that even means now. 🤣

I think it's a much un-supported group.

There should at least be a standard send-out from one's gp 🥺

Denial.

I am ageless.

@WhatWouldJKRDo

The nice thing about getting older is not giving a flying fuck for other people’s approval.

They are the stripes you’ve earned, OP.

Yeah, I'm 71, nearly 72. I take care of myself and keep myself as fit as I can; no fillers or Botox ever.

No fucks given either; it's one of the greatest compensations of getting old.

We're all going the same way, OP. Even the young, beautiful ones.

I had my shot at youth. And now I'm absolutely fucking crushing middle age.

I think it’s about reframing your image of beauty. It’s not solely about youth.

And I know it’s cheesy but it’s true - I quite like to think of wrinkles as physical evidence you’ve lived and enjoyed, particularly laughter lines etc.

I love getting older. I wear what I want,don’t worry about what anyone thinks And when I look in the mirror I see my mum. She died when I was 18 so I am just really grateful that I’ve managed to live to the age I have. I also have beautiful daughters and nieces so I don’t get jealous being surrounded by good looking females.

Give it a few more years and you'll be far more concerned about the state of your joints and other bits of you than the lines on your face, OP!

I'm 65 and (so I'm told) look much younger. But my knees, spine and hands feel 80-odd, thanks to arthritis, which I started to suffer from in my late 30s, and one of my shoulders was practically useless until I had surgery on it a few years ago. I'd gladly have a wrinklier face if the trade-off was fully-functioning joints.

Eat well, use a high SPF on your face and take care of your skin, and be thankful that that's only sign of ageing you've got to worry about.

I wasn't worrying about it at 42!

@Ihatefish

Being grateful for the opportunity to age. It’s far better than the alternative. Concentrate on the value of what’s inside, the outside is simply a shell -keep it as healthy as you can, but it’s only a house to shelter you.

This. Wise words.

Come and work with me. Watch and listen as 40 somethings grapple with the knowledge that they will not be alive by the time Christmas comes, and that they will have to leave their young children and loved ones behind.
That gives me a sense of perspective I've never had before.

Exercise is a huge thing, for me anyway. I’m getting fit after a couple of years on the slide ( and an extra stone) and I feel so much better, and more like me. Eating healthily, no smoking and not too much booze is part of it. Also coming to terms with your life choices 🙂

I used to worry about this in my 40’s. now like other PPs don’t give a fuck. That in itself is exactly what is the most liberating about getting older

Yup I turned 50 recently and although 30 and 40 didn't bother me, 50 did. Not enough to piss about with botox or whatever...it's not about how I look, more about where the hell the time has gone. One of my best pals has MND and probably won't get to 50...I keep her in my mind when I start with the self pitying crap.

I combine denial, working with old people and having fun with people I love, sorted

Make the best of what you've got is what I do (apart from my hair which is a whole other story)

Eat well, exercise and get plenty of sleep. Wear clothes that suit you and don't pander to fashion.

When you get older you tend not to be quite so material in your needs.

Those beautiful girls in your office are waiting to marry and have babies.. if you've been there and done that you kind of know what makes you tick and how to treat yourself well now. Relax............ breathe...... and not too much wine :)