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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To think that 2 pieces of toast does not warrant using a farkin dinner plate??!

121 replies

theUrbanDryad · 09/10/2007 11:24

dh always uses a dinner plate for his 2 pieces of morning toast. why can't he get it through his head that a small plate would do? it's more washing up for me!

also - why can't he put his dirty washing in the washing basket, rather than flinging it in the general direction? i don't even care that much if he does it with his clothes (means they don't get washed though) but he does it with ds' as well and it drives me up the farking wall!!

and - when i ask him about these things - why does he think it's ok to accuse me of "attacking" him and go into injured sulk mode for most of the evening??

ARRRRRRRRRRGH!

ah, that feels better.

but, AIBU?

OP posts:
ToadieG1 · 09/10/2007 11:25

YANBU imo.

compo · 09/10/2007 11:26

lol
does it really take you longer to wash up a big plate as opposed to a small one?!

IfYouCanKeepYourHead · 09/10/2007 11:27

YANBU - it is my expert opinion that all husbands have a general air of crappiness at the moment - I think it is seasonal...

vacua · 09/10/2007 11:27

get a dishwasher?

DaDaDa · 09/10/2007 11:27

YABU abou the toast. Using a small plate for 2 slices of toast would mean crumbs all over the place. And it's hardly more washing up is it? Just a wider circumference on the sweep of the dishcloth!

nailpolish · 09/10/2007 11:28

it takes 2 secs to wahs a plate no mater the size

just think - i fhe used a smaller plate he might spill more crumbs for you to hoover up

FrannyandZooey · 09/10/2007 11:28

LOL at the dinner plate being more washing up

I have a teeny inkling this may not be entirely about the washing up?

belgo · 09/10/2007 11:28

YABU. If the plate is too small, it's easy to break the toast when spreading. A dinner plate is far more practical.

YANBU regarding the washing!

Original poster
theUrbanDryad · 09/10/2007 11:31

no room in kitchen for a dishwasher rest assured when we get our own place the first thing i will be lobbying for is a dishwasher. i hates washing up, i do.

and you're all right, it's no more washing up to use a big plate than a small plate really, but the thing is, if i've done the washing up from the dinner the night before and the kitchen is tidy, him coming downstairs and putting a big plate by the sink makes the kitchen look more untidy than if it was a small plate. if it's just a small plate and a mug, i can get away with not doing the washing up till evening

go on, tell me i'm mad. i know it anyway...

OP posts:
nailpolish · 09/10/2007 11:31

dishwashers are shit
i had one but i gave it away

Original poster
theUrbanDryad · 09/10/2007 11:32

ps - i try and hoover every day anyway, cause ds is crawling, so it doesn't matter if he drops crumbs or not. ideally, he wouldn't use any plate, and drink his tea straight from the kettle, then i wouldn't have to do any washing up at all.....

OP posts:
SSSandy2 · 09/10/2007 11:33

ha ha ha
THE PLATE!!!!
But you're right about the washing.

belgo · 09/10/2007 11:33

theUrbandryad - once you get a dishwasher, I guarentee you will argue about who fills it and empties it.

bozza · 09/10/2007 11:33

No real reason why he isn't doing some of the washing up himself so I think YANBU.

DaDaDa · 09/10/2007 11:34

"if i've done the washing up from the dinner the night before and the kitchen is tidy, him coming downstairs and putting a big plate by the sink makes the kitchen look more untidy than if it was a small plate."

Whoop! Whoop! OCD alert!

duchesse · 09/10/2007 11:34

re dinner plate- Does it really matter? It sounds like one of those things that used to really annoy me when I was getting too close to housework for comfort (ie to the edge of brain-frazzling)

As for the clothes, you are defo nbu- let them lie where they are. If they really bother you (and I can really see why that would bug. Do what I do with my son- get a big plastic box. Put in an out of the way place. Put any offendingly misplaced item into the box. Voila! End of problem for you. Husband knows where to find stuff if he gives a damn. Maybe starts to give a damn when he has no clean clothes. Do NOT clear up after him or you become the chamber maid.

Original poster
theUrbanDryad · 09/10/2007 11:34

well, bozza, the reason i do the housework is cause he's at work all day at a job he really hates, so i do think it's only fair i do the washing up. it's just that the plate thing really irritates me

OP posts:
Original poster
theUrbanDryad · 09/10/2007 11:39

duchesse - i don't give a flying fuck hoot where he puts his own clothes, it's when he flings ds' clothes into the corner of the room in a scrunched up ball, so they don't get washed because i assume that they're all dh's clothes that i go into meltdown!

the stupid thing is, i'm not an excessively neat person, i'm really not. my mum would tell you - i'm sure she despairs at the state of my house! i do have a specific way of hanging clothes on the airer/line, and i always wash up in a certain way. in all seriousness, i think i may be slightly OCD, but what does one do about it? and surely, if you could look at yourself and think, "That's obsessive compulsive behaviour," then you're not OCD? i mean, you drift into madness, or you wake up to it, but you don't make an inaugral speech...

OP posts:
duchesse · 09/10/2007 11:43

Hanging clothes just so is just common sense- saves time in the long run. The clothes does sound jolly annoying, but I think you may be transposing your frustration with husband onto the plate issue. My tuppence worth. No idea whether OCD is mad enough for one to be unaware of it. Think on balance, not. ahem My sister and I are both a little, you know, finicky. Also, like you, neither of us has an excessively tidy house (I wish...) or personality. Just hate spending any more time on housework than I have to.

CountessDracula · 09/10/2007 11:49

blimey
you do sound a bit mad tbh
It is a house not a museum I take it

DaDaDa · 09/10/2007 11:54

Straw poll. Who butters/cuts toast on a chopping board, and who does it on the plate?

I do it on the plate, hence agreement with the hectored Mr Dryad.

Original poster
theUrbanDryad · 09/10/2007 11:55

CD - it's not a museum, but we do rent, and i'm a bit paranoid about the carpets and stuff, because we need our deposit back off this place more or less intact! see also: soaking the floor whilst having a shower, leaving half drunk cups of tea on the floor with active 9mo about the place.

OP posts:
duchesse · 09/10/2007 11:56

That is a bit daft. Deposits are not small sums, and all the landlords want is to keep them...

Original poster
theUrbanDryad · 09/10/2007 11:56

see, i do toast on the board, then wipe up the crumbs. easy. quite often i don't actually use a plate!

OP posts:
Original poster
theUrbanDryad · 09/10/2007 11:57

best part of seven hundred quid duchesse

OP posts:
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