To ask (lightheartedly) what’s the most bizarre or confusing “because of Covid” you’ve heard?

[Rainbowb]

My next door neighbour has had someone else walk her dog for her since lockdown “because of covid”. Never goes further than her garden. Such a shame because daily walks have never been banned and I’m sure the change of scene would benefit her and her dog would love her to take him!

Just wondered if anyone else has come across bizarre things being done or not done “because of covid?”.

Disclaimer - this is a light hearted thread just to help see the funny side a bit for my own sanity. It’s not meant to be dismissive of people’s genuine experiences or fears.

@dentydown

My son has to take the exact measurements of ingredients because of COVID. The school used to provide Cooking oil, salt and pepper , but now the children have to take the ingredients in, in disposable bags/pots because of COVID. I’m looking at amazon for takeaway pots for the flipping cooking oil!

But this actually makes sense? One cooking oil bottle shared by every child touching it passing it around, or the teacher has to walk within 2m of all of them to give it out? Rather than staying at the front?

A group of 6 people allowed to meet up from 6 different households but 8 people that live together cannot go out together....because of covid ...

Yet if all go shooting then can have a much larger group because covid doesn't bother with you if you are in a shooting party

@Phrowzunn

My mum who was shielding would only go in her back garden not her front garden. The front garden (though walled off and gated) has pavement running alongside it so people could walk past, so she would only go in back garden which is totally private. We gave her a wee ribbing for it at the time.

Sorry OP I know you said light hearted, but Aren’t you fucking delightful giving her a rubbing?! So at the beginning the government didn’t know how the virus was spread and told people to not go in their gardens if shielded?And the people felt ok to go in their back gardens as people walking past their front could still infect them? But crack on and laugh at your terrified parent.

Dh called up for help renewing the car insurance and received what sounded like a pre-recorded message about calls not being taken due to Covid.
He said "hang on...is this a pre-recorded message or are you an actual person?" and it was an actual person!
Why they have their staff answering calls to read a script to say they are not answering calls is beyond me.

Have to wear masks in communal areas but not in class with 30 kids.

Roads being turned into cycle lanes, "cos Covid"

Every week I have to do a 8 mile round trip, which took 40mins each way as the traffic is always awful. Now it takes over an hour each way.

The cycle lane is always empty.

@Danglingmod

Yeah, it's kind of getting my goat that public libraries can't open now schools must. Libraries are far calmer, quieter and naturally socially distanced.

Isn't that to do with lots of different people touching the books? (Although bookshops seem to be open...)

Nationwide Building Society locally allow one person only in the branch. The staff are behind screens and it is quite roomy. Apparently it is not wide enough. People have to queue for up to 40 minutes outside often in the rain. Staff come outside wearing visors and offer limited help.

Now they will not issue mini statements at the counter. I was told off for asking for one. I had to point out the cash machine was out of order where I was meant to get one. So now you have to queue at the cash machine for bills, statements and then another queue to go in.

They say mini statements take up too much time, but it is people opening accounts etc that is taking up huge amounts of time. Just make an appointment fgs. There is a separate large office for this.

They also only open between 10-2 as well. People ask to go in front of you in the queue as well. Staff there say you have to queue for everything now. They don't. They are sat inside keeping dry. I actually watched one man completely lose it last week which was pretty scary.

I understand from friends who pay in cash from their small business that Nat West are the same.

I think we need to vote with our feet when this is over and if there are any businesses left.

People behaving as though they are clinically vulnerable when they are not. Certain members of my family were OUTRAGED they were not classed as clinically vulnerable and badgered the GP.
I am clinically vulnerable and again they were OUTRAGED and bullied me to get them on a special list they just knew I had put myself on. I felt like the freakin' Illuminati.
Some of these people have been shielding now for about 6 months whilst I prance about in my clinically vulnerable status at the shops that they would not dare visit...

My partner's brother who ahs got his mother on the no mask list for absolutely no reason other than he wants her on that list.

My mum pointed out yesterday that an elbow bump "because of Covid" still made skin to skin contact and actually put you closer to someone droplets wise than a handshake which is at least 1m distance and you can wash or gel hands after!

@Valleydad99

My boy was banned from using armbands in the pool "because of covid". I assumed I misunderstood at first so asked for a repeat from the centre staff but apparently he could have carried the virus in on the plastic armbands. They didn't answer whether I should shave the children before swimming in future as they could carry it in on their hair. Was a bizarre interaction all told

That is totally random! Especially as they use the pool water to clean the shared areas because the chlorine kills the virus!

@AutumnSuns they are in the same bubble. We either do bubbles or we don’t. My son isn’t allowed

My son isn’t allowed to bring a sealed 500ml bottle of oil for his bubble to use and measure out then discard at the end of the lesson. Everyone has to take 2 table spoons of oil in!

My nursery pupils are not allowed to sit next to each other in the lunch hall but are allowed to sit next to each other on the carpet for story time...

They can go to the beach and play in the sand but not in the sand tray in my classroom.

They can read books from the book area but reading books have to be quarantined for 72 hours..

It's ridiculous!

Lots of handwashing, catching sneezes and coughs in tissues...that's all can be realistically expected in a room of 33 3 year olds!

@ProlificNameChanger2000

This is fucking disgusting *GP surgery doing all flu jabs over several days in one local secondary school - for population of 45000 people - all vulnerable, shielding and elderly people told to make their way there at specified time slot . No direct public transport to the school or parking .

Said this is safest option . As opposed to doing them in GP surgeries ...

It’s bonkers is what it is .*

I hope to God this gets investigated. I bet my bottom dollar it's selfish on the part of the practice in terms of saving their own skin. This is NOT in the interest of all these elderly patients. PLEASE WRITE TO YOUR MP AND MATT HANCOCK ON THIS THIS IS NOT RIGHT!

Apparently it’s all GP surgeries - my 80 y/o grandmother was told she will be assigned a time slot and told to go up to one of two schools . Said all people (other than children and healthcare/social/council employees) will be sent to same schools. Have since checked this with GP who says yep, she isn’t sure if it’s being done in school playground or a classroom/gym hall though .

One is seven miles away with no parking, or one bus and a miles walk - the other is ten miles away, no parking or two buses and a miles walk .

AFAIK it is the same shire wide . It is mind boggling .

My GP surgery are still doing most examinations (ie absolutely everything that doesn’t require you to strip off) through car windows however and have said they have zero plans to change this so I’m not holding out much hope !

@Allmyarseandpeggymartin

Gluten free pizza bases have disappeared in dominos “cos of Covid” I didn’t realise that a pandemic cured coeliac disease!!!

Do you have local independent pizza places? Mine will do me one takeout with GF base and I'm more than happy to spend at local than feed the fat cats who cba due to stupid reasons!

Plus they don't do Gf half the size for twice the price!

I booked a bed and breakfast but they stopped doing breakfast 'because of Covid' ☹️

Stopped in a hotel. They had Weetabix and Special K but no other cereals, due to Covid. Similarly, they had fried and scrambled eggs, but not poached, due to Covid

I agree that many councils will be using Covid as an excuse to libraries. Ours is one in at a time for up to 30 minutes and you have to give your details for track and trace. Funnily enough, people aren't lining up for that experience.

One of DC's schools is still doing everything as normal, just with SD but another DC's school has cancelled absolutely everything fun because Covid. Even thought it is a much smaller school. Same council, same guidelines.

AldiAisle Of course that suits people better, but it seems to me that there is a big inequality about who can choose to be careful and who needs to take their chances to make a living.

MamaGothel it makes no sense to say that because some people can't work from home, then it's unfair and everyone should be working in their offices etc. People working from home goes some way to protect those who don't have that option. Public transport would be impossible if everyone used them to get to work when they don't need to. It's not a lot, but is one contribution that people can make.

My husband has been working from home since someone in his office was hospitalised with CV. That was a couple of weeks before lockdown. The office has opened up now, but just for those that need to go in for mental health or domestic abuse reasons. If everyone went in the environment would be much less safe for those that need to go in. He is also not taking up valuable space in a commuter train.

Sign outside the toilets in a department store saying to only use them if you have a real need. I rarely go just for fun! Then, every other cubicle was cordoned off inside.

Council are also claiming they can’t answer the phone because of Covid - was on hold two hours the other day, when I did get through the lass said they’re only allowed two people to answer the phone - one line for the entire council . No offer of direct lines for different departments or email contact !!

Covid for some companies has been a welcome excuse to cancel any pretence at customer service.

Virgin Media and Currys I am looking at you

DH has to, in turn with other Officers, supervise mealtimes for soldiers in the cookhouse. Apparently they were getting to close to each other.... This is people they share rooms with for sleeping in, shooting with, and other training. They are only allowed to sit diagonally from each other at mealtimes though....

Not being able to try on shoes in shops

That's saved me a small fortune. I've got awkward feet (narrow, high instep) and never buy shoes without trying them on, as so few shoes fit me properly.

I also love shoes and buy far too many, but not this year!