Sayings / arguments on Mumsnet that you hate?

[Polkapoo]

There's a few but one I see often that just makes me is 'what if they were your kids?'.

It's obviously always said in response to someone who is not the child's parent and therefore surely a completely pointless argument?!

What others do you always see and eye roll at?

@maybelaterdear

Can someone please tell me what the little flower means?Can't find it on my phone.See it used a lot.

The little flower that one? It is a virtual sending someone who's having a hard time flowers.

We saw a friend (socially distanced) at the weekend.

F**k off. You don’t need to say what the distance between you and your mate was.

Using brackets in general on Mumsnet gets on my nerves. If the information isn’t necessary enough to be included without a set of brackets, just leave it out!

OP: My sister’s being a bitch.
Next few posters: I agree.
Poster 10: Actually I think you’re being harsh; she has a point.
PP: OMG, are you the sister?!

Yes - out of the millions of registered MN users, the OP’s sister just happens to have found the thread. Obviously that’s far more likely than someone just agreeing with the OP.

Re: Covid, I have noticed a trend on here and also on social media that suggests that the vulnerable should be isolating while everyone else goes back to work as normal. Well, the vulnerable have to work too! Not all of them can work from home

@Reader1984

'Leave him.'

All because he ate your last custard cream.

Exactly! Eating your last.custard cream isn't a LTB offence. Eating the last Jaffa Cake or Jammy Dodger, on the other hand....

Reading a pleasant enough thread and seeing multiple "I vote for classics" and thinking wtf. Or maybe I'm a miserable bitch because at most, it made me puff a bit of air out of my nose.

People reading far too much in to posts. "AIBU to think my 25 year old DD who has a full time job should pay towards her food costs" "WOW OP you really don't like her do you and it shows, be prepared for her to cut you off" crazy.

Another one.....’blue lighted’ to hospital. So melodramatic.

Also ‘the doctor said I was MINUTES away from EXPLODING’. Nonsense. No such thing has ever been said by any doctor anywhere.

Any suggestion that people ‘demand’ xyz medical test/referral. Always made by people with demonstrably zero actual knowledge or experience. Demand away......you’ll be treated with what is clinically appropriate, not what some fool on on the Internet suggested because their second cousin totally used to be a nurse.

I do a ginormous eye roll when posters suggest a text message/email/letter to a neighbour/colleague/relative of the OP and then proceed to type out an actual letter full of ridiculous words no one uses IRL like "forthwith" and "abscond". Do they think they sound clever?! I just picture the recipient pissing themselves laughing over the letter and showing their mates.

For example

OP: "My neighbour's cat won't stop shitting in my garden getting fed up of cleaning it daily".

Suggestion:
"Dear OP's neighbour. I have recently noticed that your one auburn feline has taken it upon himself to dispose of his fecal matter amongst our fauna. Whilst I fully appreciate the adoration one has for one's domestic animals, the very nature of feline ablutions is rather dire and unfortunate for your long suffering neighbours - one knows a cat does not defecate in the surroundings of its own abode! If it's at all possible that we can rendez vous to converse about this matter, forthwith and forthright, we would be most appreciative.
Yours sincerely
OP"

Fuck off you weirdo!

"Living my best life" and "At the end of the day..."

[quote WaterOffADucksCrack]@ShebaShimmyShake it wasn't "gently taking the mick". And the fact you've followed me around mumsnet and are now insulting me for no reason is concerning. It says a lot about you. I'm glad you think me having to learn English on my own due to being forced out of my home country is funny to you though.[/quote]
You know, and everyone who's read our exchanges knows, that I said nothing of the sort. I didn't even know English wasn't your first language or anything else of your life history. All I knew was that you were making untrue accusations, like you're doing now, and in a very sanctimonious and self-aggrandising manner. In the context, a glaring typo that ruined the imagined power of it, was kind of funny. It still is. Incidentally, that was the second time you brought that exchange from several days ago to this thread; I ignored it the first time. Who's dragging it around?

I will repeat what I said last time and then I'll stop derailing the thread (you know it was intended for general MN phrases that annoy you and not to resurrect individual grievances?): if you think someone has done something wrong, report the post. Mods are there for a reason and they can take action if they think you're right. I've deported stuff and I've found they're very swift to take action and even send you nice emails. Taking it upon yourself to lecture people instead, especially when you've got the accusations totally arse about face, isn't only counter-productive, but actually really quite self-important. And funny, when autocorrect fucks up.

Haha, autocorrect fucked up for me that time! You can laugh if you like. I did.

We saw a friend (socially distanced) at the weekend.

I absolutely loathe this too. I have a couple of friends on facebook who are always meeting their friends for drinks (socially distanced of course). The photos would suggest otherwise.

You sound vile
You sound hard work
When someone tells you what they are, believe them.
Trust your instincts (always disastrous)
I've been shaking and crying for hours/days (no-one actually does that)
People who assure others that all solicitors offer half an hour's free advice

"Spidey senses" - usually with an implication that they are 100% reliable. Because if anything they're the reverse.

"Didn't want to read and run". There are millions of people on MN. No-one will know or care.

Competitive hygiene generally, particularly people who claim others are grim if they don't wash their towels every time they get used.

Insinuating another poster is thick or uneducated to bully your point across.

@ShebaShimmyShake I'm not going to bother reading your post. Please stop derailing the thread. And please don't follow me from thread to thread.

People who insist that all naughty children have SN and all adults acting like dickheads towards you are "going through stuff" or have depression (except husbands being dickheads. They're just dickheads and you should LTB)
And when the OP says they know there's no SN (could be a close family member of the child and know everything about them and it's just shit parenting) posters obviously know the child better and will tell the OP they couldn't possibly know.

Also hate when a GFer poster (usually one with a recognisable username for doing it) reacts to a tiny piece of almost irrelevant information in the OP such as a story that involves someone stealing from their child, and they just have a go at the OP for the child owning it in the first place. This starts a chain reaction of other posters piling in on this pointless bit to berate the OP for being a shit parent. From a concerned parent she is quickly turned into the equivalent of Rose West.

Use of

//

This

Oh...Sandra has spoken and decided who the most worthy commentator is. Thank you Sandra I didn’t know what to think until you popped along and told me.

Fan girls who lap up ‘popular poster’ opinions that are no more insightful, or interesting than any one else’s.

Posters that come on to let you know they agree with a poster from 15 pages ago, don’t quote them or hint what it is, so you end up scrolling a billion comments to figure out what they are referencing.

A like button would be really useful, to stop the ‘this’ brigade. It might also be helpful to see how popular ‘popular posters ‘ actually are and it would weed out a few sock puppets too.

@Smallsteps88

“Urgent” “Help” “Am I pregnant?” “Handhold needed” “He’s an amazing father”

Am I Pregnant irritates the life out of me. Don't mind so much if someone has a squinted on a test and maybe just wants a second opinion before getting their hopes up. It's the ones that post something like period isn't due for another 7 days but I feel sick and have sore boobs could I possibly be pregnant. Dunno love only one way to find out, but wait till your period is late before you test. Or the I haven't bothered taking a test and my period is late am I Pregnant. Non us can tell you that we don't have super sonic eye sight that can see a foetus inside your uterus. Be nice if we could, I'd have saved a fortune on tests over the years!

Picture or it didn't happen

I'm the person who said "are you on glue?" in that wedding thread years ago, so I'd like to formally apologise for the distress it's caused so many of you.

There were lots of people suggesting all sorts of wordy replies to the OP's cheeky mate, so I just threw in something like "dear bitch, are you on glue?" as a bit of a laugh. It was something off some Peter Kay show or another that I thought was amusing, but even I was surprised by just how hilarious everyone found it!

Now I have the dubious honour of having started a really annoying (to many) "thing" on MN.

Sorry!

Another one is when people start taunting an OP for not coming back to a thread quickly enough: 'Where's the OP?' 'I notice the OP hasn't come back', etc. Yes, sometimes it may be that the OP was deliberately stoking an argument and running off; but they may also have work and family commitments that prevent them from being on Mumsnet 24/7!

@ddl1

Another one is when people start taunting an OP for not coming back to a thread quickly enough: 'Where's the OP?' 'I notice the OP hasn't come back', etc. Yes, sometimes it may be that the OP was deliberately stoking an argument and running off; but they may also have work and family commitments that prevent them from being on Mumsnet 24/7!

Also when they get taunted for not leaving the bastard as quickly as posters would like.

I.e. 5 mins after they've been told to by posters

Also when they get taunted for not leaving the bastard as quickly as posters would like.

Id often think they do really leave.Do they just tell the posters what they want to hear and just name change and stay with them.

Also, why is Covid always described as having "ripped through" a population /area etc?!? There's so many different ways to describe it spreading, why does everyone use the same one?!?