My DS is ENORMOUS. Can I have some reassurance please?

[GinAtMerlottes]

He’s just huge. Always been stocky with a BMI hovering on the overweight but it’s definitely tipped over now. He’s 4.5, 115cm tall and 23.5kg.

He is definitely big boned.... he has
no fat on his ribs but his rib cage is half as big again as his friends, who is a year older. His hands are bigger than those of his brother, who is 4 years older. He takes size 1 shoes.

Over lockdown of course our activity levels are much lower than usual, although we’ve been having our daily walks. He’s just started school, and restarted rugby and swimming.

Food wise, he has weetabix or porridge for breakfast with a cup of milk, fruit for snack, school lunches, fruit or peanut butter and apple or similar after school, and normal family dinner. Has fruit and a biscuit after dinner. Has a glass of squash at dinner but otherwise drinks water.

Eldest DS has always been very slim. My family and DHs family are all overweight. My brother is very very tall, over 6 ft 7.

I can see DS2 is destined to be tall and large, but any tips or reassurance would be very welcome.

He is overweight by about 1 kg - for a child that’s quite a lot. (look at the nhs calculator).
How active is he? At his age walking 3-4 miles per day should be fine, plus sports.
How are his portion sizes? There are online tools to check them. It is very possible to overfeed kids on healthy food, especially if they like food.
Many kids are tall because they are heavy, not the other way round. But he is so young, its still easy to change things!

@timeforanew

He is overweight by about 1 kg - for a child that’s quite a lot. (look at the nhs calculator). How active is he? At his age walking 3-4 miles per day should be fine, plus sports. How are his portion sizes? There are online tools to check them. It is very possible to overfeed kids on healthy food, especially if they like food. Many kids are tall because they are heavy, not the other way round. But he is so young, its still easy to change things!

But fairly easily fixed.....

It does sound like he's just a big lad - if he's a big build then he will weigh more and come up high on the BMI.

How are his portion sizes? Is he a big eater?

Are you active as a family? We try to get out walking or on bikes most days, especially at the weekend.

@GinAtMerlottes

He’s just huge. Always been stocky with a BMI hovering on the overweight but it’s definitely tipped over now. He’s 4.5, 115cm tall and 23.5kg.

He is definitely big boned.... he has
no fat on his ribs but his rib cage is half as big again as his friends, who is a year older. His hands are bigger than those of his brother, who is 4 years older. He takes size 1 shoes.

Over lockdown of course our activity levels are much lower than usual, although we’ve been having our daily walks. He’s just started school, and restarted rugby and swimming.

Food wise, he has weetabix or porridge for breakfast with a cup of milk, fruit for snack, school lunches, fruit or peanut butter and apple or similar after school, and normal family dinner. Has fruit and a biscuit after dinner. Has a glass of squash at dinner but otherwise drinks water.

Eldest DS has always been very slim. My family and DHs family are all overweight. My brother is very very tall, over 6 ft 7.

I can see DS2 is destined to be tall and large, but any tips or reassurance would be very welcome.

A quick check of his BMI shows hes just into overweight... You can very quickly get him back to normal with a few simple changes - mostly I think more exercise... With my DS at the same age (similar BMI) I just switched to semi skimmed milk, made sure he had lots of fruit and no cake and sweets for a few weeks, cut juice for water more often....walked a bit more (I actually bought a theme park pass then used to go at weekends - he never seemed to notice we were walking from one side of the park to the other each time we chose a ride!! I also took a packed lunch - he just accepted that we "couldn't afford" snacks if we went on the rides)

At no point did I put him on a diet, or deprive him.

I made sure we just didn't have the snacky, sweet food in the house, and the problem will resolve itself.

My son was like that. Always on the 98th centile and always looked fat compared to his friends regardless of his diet or the fact that he did loads of sport. I worried endlessly that he would be bullied at school but he had a larger than life personality and good friends. When he hit 16 everything changed. He is now 22, 6'3" and although will never be skinny has a good physic and plays rugby. Sometimes they just need to catch up with themselves especially if you are doing everything right.

Don’t cut what he’s eating OP.

He’s not eating anything bad and it sounds like he’s just a big lad.

How old is his dad? At the 98th percentile he’s going to be a bruiser. If he’s not fat, he’s not fat. What clothes size does he take? Is he due a growth spurt?

How tall is his dad I mean! Not how bloody old...

@FrothyB thank you so much for sharing that. I have accepted/do accept there is a chance my son will be overweight, there is a strong family history of it. And of course I will love and support and accept him absolutely regardless.

My brother might be able to tell a similar story - 6ft7, strange body shape and overweight. He went through a similar journey but seems to have found his place now and uses his height to an advantage.

@RightYesButNo school is fairly new, and obviously eating habits change fairly quickly when they are little, but it’s certainly how we’ve eaten since last September, when he started nursery. I did his BMI in the Feb half term and it was 85 so I was on a warning (from myself). Then lockdown! Definitely an extra biscuit or two or ice cream, we had Saturday night movie nights every week with snacks, then when we could go to restaurants again we did that a lot. We baked all the time, he loves helping me with that and with cooking.

I think I know what to do, but thanks so much everyone for your replies.

@canigohomenow DH is 6ft. My mum is 5’11, my dad 6’3.

He def has a tummy. Ribs and chest and arms OK. Legs and bum are massive, totally solid but huge. He could never fit in pair of skinny jeans for instance. He’s in size 6 joggers for the length, he has some size 5, the waist is fine but too short. School trousers he is in size 6 and I can’t take in the waist band at all. Tops 5-6 ish.

I was like this, I do remember at school having someone measure and weigh me regularly because they were concerned, obviously I don't remember being a baby though! But turns out I stopped growing at 5'11 and a healthy weight.

He sounds exactly like DS shopping can be difficult because a lot of pants don’t get by his thighs and bum (which is solid as you say rather than fat)
Stomach wise depends on where he is in a growth spurt tends to protrude out a lot more before he grows

When pools are back in your area contact the local swim club (cheaper and better lessons than leisure centres) and get him swimming. If he does club swimming when he's older it is a skill /exercise that'll likely stay with him for life keeping him healthy long term and being tall is a real advantage.

Mines 11
In age 16 Bottoms
Men’s medium tops
Dads 6 foot ,dc is up to his shoulder
2 siblings at 6 foot 4.
God does he like to eat ,I do find it hard trying to get him to wait for his meals

It sounds like everyone indulged too much over summer.

Your DS has 3 meals and 3 snacks. I would cut the snacks out. Nobody needs them.

Look up portion sizes too for things you serve and measure it out a few times so you can see what it looks like. This would help the entire family as most don't know what portion sizes should be.

My son is the same and always has been. Hes now 10, size 8 feet, still much taller and broader than everyone else in his class. I downloaded a screen grab of the boys centile onto my laptop and I plot his height and weight every 4-6 months so I can check hes not getting too heavy. He sits just below the 99.6th centile for both and they are level apart from when he has a growth spurt he tends to gain weight and then shoot up and even out again within a month. Its reassuring to me seeing he is following his centile, even if it's in the rafters!
www.rcpch.ac.uk/resources/uk-who-growth-charts-2-18-years

We found DS red book recently unlike other babies he never lost weight at 10 days old he was 6oz up on his birth weight (ebf so harder to overfeed) it’s just part of who he is

My DS is a very big boy too with a solid build. He is a head over his peers now they're 5 with a size 2 shoe.
He was over the 99 centile off the scale as a baby thankfully he grew into his large head.

Yes, DS also has a massive head!!! It was commented on in scans and is like a huge boulder. We call it the bowling ball.

I think a lot of us eat more than we realise due to the size of bowl or plate. Look at the difference between the plates in the photos - the green one is from the 50’s, the blue n white are from last year. Blue n white hold twice as much as the green or striped ones! Likewise mugs vs teacups people used to use, and glasses are bigger too.

It was commented on in scans and is like a huge boulder
My DS too he'll be fine as long as long he is active. My HV said if he has big hands and feet he is a well built boy nothing else.
There are many natural rugby shaped men.
My niece is a whippet and will eat far more than DS.
DP is 6.2.
I'm not worried.

My son has just started year 1. He was massive as a baby - a real sumo baby! Always loved his food, always hungry and always on the go. He is 99 centile and is quite solid. Not fat just solid. He wears 6-7 clothes and they just fit. He tends to get a but chubby before he has a growth spurt then goes back to heing solid again. I think its just the way he is built- his half brother is 6ft6 and built like a wardrobe so assume he is going the same way!

My son was not a huge baby but he grew pretty quick
By the time he was 2 we were being asked why he wasn’t at school when out and about and getting funny looks when he behaved like the toddler he was. He started school much taller than everyone else and finished Primary the same. He has just started Secondary and is so much taller than the rest of his year, he is also well into puberty and has the beginnings of a moustache! He is taller than me and his 15 year old sister and has size 9 feet. He could pass for 14 easily
He has been a bit chubby at times but he seems to go out and then up so it evens out.
He still wants cuddles from his mum though, although these days it’s like hugging a man rather than my baby boy

Emerald shamrock
That’s interesting I’d not not heard that
My ds had huge .huge hands when he was born
First thing we said was ,he’s going to be a boxer .

At his age it’s fairly easy to swap out a few things to hold their weight steady. It won’t take him long to grow into it.
We did this with DS1 as he had the tendency to put on weight easily. He is now a 6’2” teen rugby player (there is a pattern emerging here) with size 11.5 feet.

Total anecdata, but my DB and DSS were both enormous and chunky as toddlers and pretty much all through primary. But at puberty, when a lot of kids were fill out, they both thinned out.

By the time they finished secondary, they were tall (just over 6'2") and broad shouldered, but slim. Neither of them grew much taller after mid-teens. And both have big feet and hands, and are great swimmers. I don't know if the swimming impacts the body shape, or the body shape makes them good swimmers.

And no-one knows where DSS gets his height from, as both sides of his family are mostly short (DP is the tallest, at 5'10"). You'd think my bro was my stepson's dad if you saw the 3 of them together, it's a bit weird really.

As long as he's getting a decent diet and plenty of exercise, I wouldn't worry.

TL,DR: the build of a young child is no indicator of how they'll end up.