DD’s boss and babe station comment?

[GazingAndGrazing]

DD is 16 and commenced an apprenticeship at the beginning of September.

We asked for a contract and the HR person said she was working on it.

1st day I picked DD up and she was full of beans, all good and laughing that they have dress down day every Friday and as long as she wore heels she could wear jeans etc

It’s a smallish team with a company director/owner. DD is autistic, I let the HR person know after her first day, explained how organised and meticulous she is.

DD is 1 of 3 apprentices she is the youngest. She grumbled that she has to make all the tea, fetch milk and then it was clean kitchen cupboards out, empty bins, fetch Directors lunch whilst the other 2 answered phones and took messages. DD is very black and white so she questioned why she was being treated differently.

I only have DDs version of events. She said, when she questioned being treated differently he said it was because he could, she was only an apprentice and she would do as he told her because he earns £300k a year and she earns nothing.

She asked to book holiday on Christmas Eve and he said no, she doesn’t get holiday for the 1st year as an apprentice and she was only allowed 15 mins lunch instead of an hour like the other 2.

Last incident where DD walked out was him telling the other males in the office that he would earn more from the apprentices if he put them to work on babe station.

That happened on Friday. I called to speak to him, he was “in a meeting” I called Again and left a message fOr the HR person to call me. I’ve heard nothing at all.

What rights does DD have as an apprentice of not even 1 month with no contract?

Thank you whatnow and I’m so sorry you have first hand experience, it’s appalling in this day and age.

We are currently wading through the PIP process as well so it all feels quite stressful and we just need to reminder ourselves it’s not her fault. We are also struggling to find another apprenticeship, she doesn’t want to go to college now, I think her confidence has taken a knock.

Have you had any further contact with ACAS? Also would the local British Chamber of Commerce be of use? I suspect that if this is how he treats apprentices, other aspects of that business are going to be sketchy.

Don't let this put her off - I've had many more good managers than bad ones - the best way for her to win is to go to college (if that's what she wants) and do what she wants. I believe it is important to not worry about what you will do after studying - make sure that you want to study your subject and that you will be able to still want to study it 2-3 years later.

She is legally allowed 30 minutes for lunch. It sounds a bit shit tbh.

I hope you get somewhere with this OP. I have an ASD DD aged 10, it’s such a worry and they are more likely to be taken advantage of.

Have a look into accountancy apprenticeships. They are often run via college with the AAT qualification. If she’s organised and methodical it’s a great option. She doesn’t need to be a maths whizz. Have a look on the government apprenticeship website. She can start level two study and exams using textbooks at home. Happy to advise if you want. I recruited this way in the past.

Thank you Shasta we have applied for a couple of apprenticeship through the gov site.

Acas have sent me the next steps, just waiting to see what DD is paid at the end of the month and we will take it from there.

The law is pretty clear on internships and apprenticeships - it shouldn't be about making tea or cleaning (unless that's actually part of the job she's being trained to do). The reason employees get to pay them little or nothing is that they're there to learn a specific set of skills rather than do the equivalent of paid work. And also he's sexually harassing her so you should complain to whoever's regulating the apprenticeship. He sounds horrible and I'd be contacting his employer at the very least.

How is your daughter doing now?

I’ve received a letter from a solicitor today and I’m raging.

Not only have they failed to address the babe station comment they have said “because DD isn’t medicated for her autism they didn’t feel it necessary to look in to reasonable adjustments apart from make a list (which DD says they didn’t do)

They addressed the heels comment by saying everyone wears casual since March and DD wore trainers every day. I took her and picked her up every day she enjoyed wearing her new dresses and blazers along with her ballerina pumps. DD doesn’t wear trainers because she gets very hot - it’s a sensory thing.

They have offered to meet with us and threatened to seek legal costs for wasting their time if we try to take things further.

And they finally supplied a “contract” which was apparently readable on their HR intranet - DD asked at least 3 times to see her contract and was told she did it have one. The contract attached to the solicitor letter reads like it was written to cover arses “you consent to us seeking medical reports, viewing them and discussing with our doctor”

It also isn’t signed by them or DD does that matter? I’m fuming, I need to calm down.

'Medicated for her autism'?!? I'm ASD and have never heard such garbage! while many people with ASD have comorbid conditions there is no thing as autism medication.

This letter is a gift for you since they are at least admitting they are disablist and clueless too. Their threats of legal action smells like defensivness. Hope you have got this logged, i'd get NAS and other local disability employment forum on this as I'd be getting the nuclear codes ready.

@JohnMcCainsDeathStare

'Medicated for her autism'?!? I'm ASD and have never heard such garbage! while many people with ASD have comorbid conditions there is no thing as autism medication.

This letter is a gift for you since they are at least admitting they are disablist and clueless too. Their threats of legal action smells like defensivness. Hope you have got this logged, i'd get NAS and other local disability employment forum on this as I'd be getting the nuclear codes ready.

Thank you I’m glad it’s not just me. The letter is ridiculous, lots of excuse and completely missing the main areas of sex and disability discrimination.

OP, its a very common defensive threat to claim they will seek legal costs. Ignore it. Its a threat and nothing more.

Don't meet them. Proceed with any legal action. Remember ACAS early conciliation first. Its possible the employer might just let EC carry on with no settlement, in the hope you don't move to the next stage (tribunal). You can definitely move to the tribunal stage, do all the paperwork etc but you could very well end up settling before it gets that far.

Scare them, don't let them scare you.

I doubt their solicitor is a real solicitor. I can't see any solicitor writing that about medication!

Thank you, it’s very stressful but after receiving the above I will keep going and I’m submitting DDs claim to Acas in the morning on her behalf as her representative.

I'm not sure if the part of that 'contract' about medical records is strictly legal

@CitizenFame

Reading all that in one go, would you let yourself be treated to and spoken to like that? I wouldn’t. Why aren’t you sticking up for your daughter?

Oh you again!

What do you get out of being so unkind all the time?

@GazingAndGrazing i've only just come across your post and am horrified that your DD had to go through that experience, in your position I would be doing as you are and acting in her behalf. I couldn't see any mention of if you had confirmed it was an official apprenticeship or not? It really doesn't sound like the organisation should be offering apprenticeships. I'm sure there was a crack down a year or so ago because organisations were just using the system to be able to pay a pittance but offer nothing in return. If they are or aren't properly registered I would be going for the jugular and reporting them to whoever will listen.

Life got in the way so I didn’t manage to submit the case to ACAS until the 6th Oct. apart from an email accepting the case we haven’t heard anything back yet.

I have only just come across this thread but wanted to wish you and your daughter the best of luck.

When I was 18 I had a job I really liked but I got a new manager who didnt warm to me at all and didnt like that I knew more than her. She did everything she could to basically get me fired. I was given a written warning with no verbal warnings, she wouldnt discuss the issues with me and gave me the ultimatum to leave that day with my notice pay and holiday pay or I was fired and have a black tick on my record. I was still so new to employment I just accepted it, i did talk to CAB who said I would win a case against them but I didnt have the confidence to fight. I really wish I had.

I am glad you are supporting your daughter, disabilities or not people do not deserve to be treated so badly in the workplace, especially the younger ones who will eventually be deciding what happens to our world when we are old and relying on everyone else.

Thank you Reviews for such a kind post.

I 100% agree with the PP, have copied and pasted paragraph below. they are just trying to scare you. You can pull out if the tribunal process at any time. Sadly I've had to go down this road twice - they're just trying to put you off. Dont meet with them. Keep everything in writing.
So glad your DD is out of there, it's just not worth it to remain in such a toxic environment, it can be so damaging.

Don't meet them. Proceed with any legal action. Remember ACAS early conciliation first. Its possible the employer might just let EC carry on with no settlement, in the hope you don't move to the next stage (tribunal). You can definitely move to the tribunal stage, do all the paperwork etc but you could very well end up settling before it gets that far.

Scare them, don't let them scare you.

Bloody hell there are some mean replies on here...a very young woman naive and vulnerable is abused by an older male employer in a number of ways and people are saying dont interfere

Agree gin. I'm so surprised to read this attitude in 2020. Grown women find it hard to deal with direct sexist discrimination and innuendo particularly at work, we see posts on here all the time regarding that; yet here are adults blithely saying a 16 year old should face down this obnoxious man, some women even glossing over the inappropriateness so they can bang on about DDs autism.

Disgusting, and sad. No wonder men get away with so much.

Good work Gazing. Hope it gets sorted quickly and DD gets some confidence back.