Should I ignore the HV?

[marvellousmaplesyrup]

Health Visitor came round to visit DS (8mths) this week for a general check up.

She said (in her own words) how "horrified" she was to see the size of DS. He's always been on 99.6th centile in both length (now 78cm) and weight, but since being weaned he's tipped slightly off the charts in weight to just over 25lbs. She me feel about 2 inches tall and gave me a proper rollicking for "over feeding" DS.

He used to have around 500mls of formula three times a day, porridge (65g) for breakfast and home cooked dinners with veg (around 100g) for lunch and dinner. No snacks, apart from some chopped up fruit when he was a bit grumpy.

Her advice is I need to cut all of this in half. Two bottles (150ml each) only on waking and bedtime, 32g of porridge, 50g of food for lunch and dinner. What's worse, is that she wants us to go from lunchtime at 11.45am until dinner at 5pm with nothing in between?

Because she made me feel so small and being a FTM, we followed her advice for a few days, but DS is understandably inconsolable and is sobbing with hunger most of the day. He is waking up in the night (despite sleeping through) and takes ages to get back to sleep.

My gut tells me I should probably cut down a bit, but not to the extent she wants us too. Surely there has to be a happy medium? AIBU to ignore her?

My first was born 6lb7. He was so big and chunky by 5 months old the baby clinic told me to wean him early because he was having too much milk. He still piled on weight as he wasnt crawling or even rolling until he was 11 months. He soon lost it all then. He's 7 now and very very slim.
My belief is a baby will eat as much as they need, and no more.

If he is tall for his age he is going to weigh more. Fgs he will naturally lose a bit when he gets mobile. Feed him the amount you think he needs, don't leave him hungry because you got a bitch of a health Visitor.

‘ Wakemeupwhenthisisover

Every HV I’ve met has no medical training. My general rule is always ignore the HV.’

What? They have to be a nurse or midwife first and do a further degree to become a health visitor.

Personally I would ignore her in this case. He will be crawling soon then walking and you might find he drops a little weight then.

We have big lads in our family (my son was born off the height chart and is 19m and the avg height of a 3 year old). We found that they tend to bulk up before they have a physical development leap.

If you need a second opinion to put your mind at ease can you request to speak to another HV or a GP who is knowledgeable about this?

Follow the advice, a fat baby will grow into a fat adult.

Rubbish!

Ignore OP, your baby's diet is fine.

*@marvellousmaplesyrup *
*
The past few days he has had:

150ml milk on waking (7am)
35g of porridge with around 20ml of whole cows milk (around 8.15)
65g of left over chicken dinner mashed - chicken, sweet potato, carrots, peas, cauliflower (11.45)
Same amount of the same meal at 5pm
180ml of milk at bedtime (7pm)*

This doesn't seem like enough to me, DS would have been inconsolable at a 5 hour wait between meals.

Did your HV measure your DS at all? I found at the clinics they would plot DS's weight but would always explain the high weight centile by saying he looked perfectly healthy for his length.

Additionally, he always put on a bit of weight before a leap or a growth spurt, perhaps your little one is about to have a growth spurt or to start crawling.

I would ignore here. Poor little thing is hungry, I wouldn’t listen to my child crying with hunger because the HV said so.

When he starts crawling/ walking etc you can get him active and he’ll probably slim down.

What do his meals usually look like op?

@Sertchgi123

Follow the advice, a fat baby will grow into a fat adult.

You clearly haven't met my children

@Sertchgi123

HVs are very well trained but generally get a very poor press on Mumsnet. HVs are registered nurses or/and midwives who have done extra training to be HVs, to degree level.

I only learnt this fact on MN and have repeated it to a lot of new mum friends over the years. I think it is quite damning of their experiences that they have all been genuinely surprised to learn that HVs are qualified nurses and midwives.

I had the opposite experience. My boy was around 50-60th centile for weight and height (but head was 99th centile- thank god for c section). Lockdown happened at around 3 months old and I next weighed him after a gap of about 2-3 months. I was shocked he was now 90th-95th gentile for weight and height- own scales but accurate. I was so upset and phoned HV. She asked me several times what I was actually worried about, reassured me he was "just a big boy" and feed him responsively.

We weaned a bit early. He is still big (now 8 months) but slowly dropping down centiles - now 90th weight and 94th height and looks less podgy. I think he was probably catching up with his head- still huge!

So very different reactions to similar stories. I'd feed him plenty of healthy food, lots of water and I'm sure it'll all balance out.

Try not to worry if Hes hungry feed him. I’m quite glad Covid has meant iv not seen my health visitor my daughter is 11 months and very big for her age. Last time we saw her she was hinting she was too big but as she was just breast fed she couldn’t say anything. I’m not worried though neither me or her dad are overweight and all her food is healthy and homemade . I’m sure she will loose it once she’s running about and I’m not going to let her go hungry.

I would also feed more. I had two very big babies (one nearly 11lb and one over 10) who were also over the 95th centile for length and head circumference. Both were very chubby babies and very good eaters. Neither were quick to walk, my daughter was nearly 18months, but then the weight dropped off. Both were skinny teens and normal adults. My son is, however, 6 feet 6inches as an adult and very solidly built so he was always going to be large as a baby. I certainly didn’t limit formula at that age.

I'd report the bitch, tbh.
Unprofessional to be so outraged and horrified.
She should also know that babies come in all sorts of shapes and sizes.

at 8 months old mine still had 4 milk feeds. They're supposed to have around 500mls at that age and that would be difficult to get from just 2 milk feeds
In fact nhs says around 600mls for the 7-9 months age group:

www.nhs.uk/start4life/weaning/what-to-feed-your-baby/7-9-months/#anchor-tabs

I would ignore too. I had similar worries. My DS was (is) very tall and was over 99th for weight until he was 2 and the although he’s still heavy now at nearly 3, he is totally in proportion and slim. He eats loads and is always hungry so we make sure it’s protein/veg weighted and sugary treats are v rare so he is fine. Yours will be too x

@Soubriquet

Yep ignore

Most babies are rolls on rolls and they soon burn it off once they start toddling about

My oldest was so chubby. Now she’s skinny as a bean pole

Same. My two chubby cheeked, chubby bodied babies are now both 6ft tall beanpoles! HV is just doing the job she's been trained to do but she should not be giving you a 'rollicking', that is not in her job description, she is there to help, support and advise. Enjoy your baby, he'll be a back chatting teenager before you can blink!!

500ml is about 16 ounces. My 9 month baby is having more than that still. He has between 4 and 5 bottles per day, each 7 ounces.
He eats 2 or 3 meals a day too, plus a couple of snacks. He's not fat at all (50th centile).

You know your baby and how hungry he is. Follow your own instinct.

Ignore the hv in this case and that silly poster going on about fat babies and fat adults.

‘ I’m not worried though neither me or her dad are overweight and all her food is healthy and homemade ’

You can’t over feed a baby then if it’s healthy and homemade?
Do you just get fat in a negative way from eating rubbish?

Come on...

I'd ask to be referred to a dietitian and have a good chat, probably over the phone as that's what I have had to do. Different circumstances as my boy was premature and they need to keep an eye on his weight gain etc. I wouldn't just straight up follow the advice of a health visitor to be honest.

@Sertchgi123

Follow the advice, a fat baby will grow into a fat adult.

Rubbish! My DS was a 'fat' baby. There's nothing of him now. As soon as he started moving around he slimmed down. He's 15 now and has never been even slightly overweight

@Todaythiscouldbe and that’s fine, there’s a huge difference though in ‘puppy fat’ as they say and a baby being on the big side because they’re being over fed.

Ignore.

You know best.

I’ve just checked DS’ red book. At 7 months he was 24lb (8lb 12oz at birth), so pretty comparable to your DS.

He’s coming up to 3.5 now and is a happy healthy preschooler - he’s tall for his age (taller than some of the children that have just started Reception at DD’s school!). He’s always had a big appetite (Breakfast today was a satsuma, some grapes, some chopped melon and a small bowl of cereal) but has always been perfectly in proportion height:weight wise.

I haven’t weighed him since he was about 1 but no one has raised any concerns about his weight (in nursery 4 days a week). He’s broadly built, like my husband who is 6ft1 unlike his big sister who is like an elastic band!

Try not to take it to heart, follow your instinct and if your son is hungry then feed him, just make sure you give him healthy options and he will be fine. Once he gets moving properly most of the chub will disappear!

Haha my mum was a midwife mostly a health visitor for 30 years.... Used to get so angry with some of the BS other midwives would come out with.

Often they don't tell you stuff they have learnt they tell you opinions not facts.

Once she heard a HV say that it was okay to continue Breastfeeding to a mother who was obviously very anorexic( and on file!!!) and didn't have enough nutrients to even feed herself let alone her baby who was losing a lot of weight due to lack of milk

She obviously forwarded the mum onto further help but yeah.

I would go back to normal and keep a food diary and get a dietician appointment.
You could just have a big baby, it happens