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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Life is less exciting as we age - AIBU?

121 replies

GettingUntrapped · 12/09/2020 21:16

A few days ago I was chatting to an acquaintance and when I said I was feeling a bit bored, he replied that this is to be expected, because as we get older, there are naturally fewer things to be excited about in life. He implied this was his experience. He's about 60.

I've been thinking about this and wonder that with the reduction of sex hormones etc as we age, well, things change, energy changes. I'm 54, but don't really want to give up yet.

Does life just naturally get less exciting around my age? I hate the idea of settling.

OP posts:
RelaisBlu · 12/09/2020 23:40

I wouldn't characterise it as a loss of excitement - I value the depth of perspective that being older brings.

I am often reminded of TS Eliot:

"We shall not cease from exploration
And the end of all our exploring
Will be to arrive where we started
And know the place for the first time"

Ain't that the truth?

LaurieFairyCake · 12/09/2020 23:40

I wanted to go cruising before Covid - now I cant think of anything worse than a petrie dish full of other people's illnesses Confused

Covids totally ruined that idea for me

F1ng3r12345 · 12/09/2020 23:40

Eat chocolate for breakfast

Eat chocolate any time 😋

DipSwimSwoosh · 12/09/2020 23:48

No! There is so much world to discover. The older we get, the less time we have to fit it all in. It's an exciting challenge. I want to visit many countries, swim in many seas and lakes, learn loads of stuff and meet amazing people. It's exciting!

Danni290 · 12/09/2020 23:49

@DipSwimSwoosh I'd love to feel like you! So much enthusiasm for life I love it xx

sunnysideover · 12/09/2020 23:52

Life should always be exciting! So much to learn, explore and grow from I truly I hope I never get to that stage in my life.

SarahBellam · 12/09/2020 23:55

I am 52. I have never been less bored in my live. I’ve had to completely overhaul the way I do my job due to Covid. I’ve become the head of a charity in my spare time, and my children are national level sports competitors, and all that goes with that. I’d love a bit less excitement.

F1ng3r12345 · 12/09/2020 23:58

Covid virus has tamed my traveling

I've visited a few places, just not so far away

Ive laughed, roared with excitement, chilled, slept well

Some people have not been so lucky this year, it's been a strange year

1forAll74 · 12/09/2020 23:58

Excited is maybe the wrong term to use when getting older. I am 70 plus, and find that pleasurable is the more apt term to use. Knocking on a bit is not good to think about, but I find life very pleasurable each day.My life was quite exciting years ago, but has just turned into calm and pleasurable now,

Porridgeoat · 13/09/2020 00:02

It’s more interesting in a different way in my 40s. Wouldn’t want to go back to my 20s. I’ve returned to work after years of being at home and I’ve been able to create something driven by skills evolved over the years. The kids are more entertaining now they are older and they hoover and clean. Try to do nice things with DH and my two best friends quite often. I’ve got a couple of hobbies now too so nothing gripping but all fulfilling

RaisinGhost · 13/09/2020 00:02

I look at my 2 yr old who gets almost hysterical with excitement for things like going to the playground or playing with the neighbours dog. Literally squealing with excitement.

Yep, so true. My toddler is more excited about seeing a plane fly past, or even seeing a picture of a plane in a book, than any adult would be going on the plane.

Iggypoppie · 13/09/2020 00:08

@lljkk that's fascinating do you have any links to the dopamine explanation?

Serin · 13/09/2020 00:12

DH is 60 and is seriously thinking of applying for his dream job as a penguin keeper at our local zoo
I think that is quite exciting!

MilkRunningOutAgain · 13/09/2020 00:12

I’m 53, today I’ve got excited about the lovely weather, driving a beautiful new route back from my parents (seeing opportunity for some lovely walks), feeding the guinea pigs spinach for the first time (the pigs were so happy, popcorning and burbling away), having dinner outside at sunset...so many things are fun & exciting. My DCs will be off to work and uni in a few years, I’m already enjoying much more freedom as they are old enough to be left home alone. I can pop out swimming In the evening or to meet a friend for a coffee in the week. Friday night DH and I went out locally for drinks and a meal out, no baby sitter required, it was a lovely evening. I changed teams at work in August and am enjoying taking on a new role and different people to work with - I definitely don’t feel stale, there are so many new things to do and enjoy, I still get excited by and really enjoy very small things too and don’t think this will change.

Valkadin · 13/09/2020 00:16

As you get older you have less firsts to try.

First kiss
First pay cheque
First trip abroad
The list continues

That’s why the excitement wanes.

shinynewapple2020 · 13/09/2020 00:22

Surely your life is what you make it ? (Finances and
Covid restrictions aside)

I've surprised myself how easily I've been content with my restricted life over the past few months, I enjoy reading , pottering in the garden . As long as I get to visit the sea and countryside occasionally and see my DS and a few friends I'm quite happy .

Not saying i want to stay at home
Forever , but in holidaying I'm happy with familiar places , UK/
Europe, no wish to travel the globe .

You could say this is because of my age (50s) but I think I've always been a bit like this .

I certainly don't think it's true for everyone my age , I think a lot of people really make the most of their years when their DC have grown to be off travelling and experiencing new things .

Oliversmumsarmy · 13/09/2020 01:30

I can't think of anything worse than an exciting life. Imagine the pressure, and the expense

Depends what you do.

Some things might not cost anything some only cost a few pounds and sometimes things are more expensive.

DiggerDave · 13/09/2020 01:39

Well, youths generally have more freedom to travel, change career, etc, and do things without worrying so much about the consequences.

One of my workmates jokingly refers to children as lifestealers and there is some truth to this IMO.

Mintjulia · 13/09/2020 01:53

I'm 57 and life isn't boring although other people might think it is.

I'll be starting a new job soon. This weekend I'm going clay shooting, I think I'm about to start a new relationship with a man, and my ds becomes more interesting company by the day.

My 30s were dull though, I was focused on mortgage and work, and having fun was a lower priority. Too easy to get wrapped up in the things that are 'supposed to be' important.

BigChocFrenzy · 13/09/2020 01:59

I'm 64, retired this year and I find life very exciting
I can do anything I want Smile

AmICrazyorWhat2 · 13/09/2020 02:01

I agree @DipSwimSwoosh, there’s so much I want to do. Turning 40 was a good wake-up call for me as I realized that I needed to get with things. I’ve packed in a fair amount since then (46 now) and have alot more id like to try. Try something new, OP- a sport, activity, whatever you like.

blueshoes · 13/09/2020 02:03

There is some truth to children as life stealers. Thankfully, it is not compulsory to have them. Having children pushed back my retirement by decades and pushed up my outgoings by an astronomical amount. It is a big reason why I look forward to a less exciting life. Raising a family on top of a full time job adds a level of complexity and stress that is mind boggling. I long for days of pottering.

Time40 · 13/09/2020 02:05

You have to try much harder to make life exciting, and that's because society is ageist. Ageism is WAY worse than sexism.

... I fully expect someone to disagree with me about that! lol

GrumpyHoonMain · 13/09/2020 02:07

The people love life right into old age and are excited about it usually have a social purpose. You need it to make life meaningful / exciting

allthegoodusernameshavegone · 13/09/2020 02:08

I love my life, getting older is getting better. I seriously worked my arse off when younger, I worked loads of hours but played hard too, I had so much energy & fun. then at 47 I did a uturn and exchanged money for time.