AIBU to give my child an Irish name in the UK?

[FolkSongSweet]

Posting here for traffic. I’ve seen a few heated debates on this on baby name threads recently. I’m considering giving my child an Irish name where the pronunciation isn’t obvious from the spelling. We live in London. Will this be a huge burden to the child when they grow up/a mild annoyance, or not an issue?

(NB this issue could obviously theoretically apply to lots of names, not just Irish ones, but Irish ones are what I’m considering)

YABU - don’t give your child a tricky name
YANBU - it’s not a big deal, people will learn

And deffo spell it the Gaelige way, I hate ‘anglicised’ Irish names which are basically just spelled incorrectly!

Caoimhe Is one of my all time favs as I have only ever met lovely ones! Sineads
Too...

@InspirationUnavailable

I haven’t read the full thread so don’t know if this is going against the grain, but my (adult) DC have said to me they don’t like having an Irish name . Admittedly they grew up in a very mono cultural area in England, but they’re quite introverted and struggle with having to answer questions about their heritage every time they introduce themselves. I personally wouldn’t have an issue with that - I think people are genuinely just interested where the name comes from as it’s not hugely common in England - but they do struggle with the attention it brings.

I think they also feel culturally very ‘English’ and perhaps don’t identify as strongly with being Irish as their name prompts people to assume (they also have a v Irish surname).

They do objectively like their name though - it is lovely (even if I do say so myself ). But I think as names are so closely aligned with identity, it must be difficult constantly having to answer questions on being from a certain culture that you don’t necessarily identify with.

With hindsight, I think I would have gone with a more common Irish name that people are more familiar with, so that DC wouldn’t be faced with so many questions every time they introduce themselves.

Thank you for this. We live in a very multicultural part of London now, but of course no idea where we could end up in future. I think there’s as much chance of us going back to Ireland as somewhere else in England though. It’s hard as depends so much on the personality of the child, which I can’t predict in advance.

I wish there was a name that I loved as much that was a bit more well known over here ☹️

We have our son a traditional English name... People pronounce it correctly but some spell it wrong.

We gave our daughter an Irish name... Once told people pronounce it correctly, but some spell it wrong. We've had doctors pronounce it wrong or ask how to pronounce it, but most of the time she gets called as "Miss Cantthink".

So most names are going to get spelt wrong. Go for whatever name you like and want.

No not at all. I’m English I have an Irish name and 2 of my children have Irish names. Don’t see the issue.

Ah the Starbucks name. An essential part of the J1 experience for many years if you had an Irish name 😁

I grew up in wales with a properly Irish name, I’ve always had to spell it out for people but it really has never bothered me.

Married to an Irish man in London now with our kids at a catholic school- there’s almost every Irish spelled name there so it would be a real non issue if your plan was to go down the catholic school route.

My dn has an Irish name which has been referenced throughout this thread. When my SIL registered the name in Dublin,15 years ago, she was asked, "what an unusual name. Where is that from?"

I have a name that is French in origin but has been used in UK for a long time. It's not difficult to spell or pronounce. It has one extra letter than the boys version which makes it phonetically different. Guess which version teachers, employers etc commonly mistake me for. I gave up correcting people years ago.

Go for it.

I have an Irish name and grew up in England. Yes I have had to spell it and teach people how to pronounce it, but people saying ‘she’ll spend half her life explaining it’ and seriously over estimating how many times you have to introduce yourself. It’s also worth saying that I have always always had to spell out my maiden surname and my married surname, both of which are English.

It’s always a talking point and as someone said upthread, people are either excited that they know it already, or interested in the origins.

Some people in my position will hate it. Others like me will love it. You don’t know which kind of person your daughter will be, but she’s just as likely to hate another kind of name, so go with what you love and think is beautiful, you can only do your best.

One thing my parents did was give us all middle names that are quite different to our first names, so we had options if we didn’t like them.

Good luck (I’d love to know the name!)

Thanks so much everyone for voting and your replies!

@Connelloni the name has been mentioned at least once on the thread 🙂

Tbh OP I do not see the issue. As a child we moved and by some bizarre quirk I ended up in a Catholic school (my dad was a vicar). Loads of Irish names and I am sure these days there are lots of polish names etc. This was in bloody Guildford, probably the dullest, least multicultural and unexciting place in the UK. I have since escaped to a proper city and my own DC have a name that reflects their background as do lots of other children. Never an issue.

I said this on another thread but if you are living in England you really need to think about what the name sounds like when said with an English accent.

I know from experience that the name Caoimhe for example (especially when pronounced Queeva) sounds gorgeous in an Irish accent, not so much in an Essex accent!

If you like the name go for it.

Picking a simple english name is no guarantee you won't spend your life spelling your bloody name out, my surname is nothing remarkable at all but I have to spell it out and do so routinely without being asked now or I will get any number of incorrect variations!

My sister experiences the same so it isn't just something I have chosen to do, we've both found it necessary.

Also, just to add. My DD has a name we love, not an issue with spelling or pronunciation but it is linked to a product that older generations in England may link with rather than a name. It has never been an issue, she owns it, it is a stunning name with a beautiful meaning and I cannot think of any other name that comes close. It is a classic name from another part of the UK which reflects her heritage and suits her perfectly.

My other half and I are English. We live in Scotland and have given our son an Irish name.

Just go with it.

Me and DH have both Irish and Welsh heritage. We wanted a name that was easy to say and spell for English speakers. Chose a lesser-used biblical name. Totally failed to predict the umpteen ways people would hear it and read it. DD relies on her nn which is a little better than her given name. Might as well have gone for Dabhnat tbh.

DH is Irish with an Irish name which was unusual at the time he was born in the 60s. He moved to London in the 80s and nobody could say it right or spell it, nor had a clue where it was from. Even his credit card had the wrong name on, as someone unfamiliar with the name assumed the 'o' in the name written on his application form was a 'd'

These days his name is much more well known, it's used a lot in Ireland and British people are more familiar with it - but still don't say it quite right. I don't think it would be difficult to use it in London now, it's so multicultural.

I think I've worked out what the name you want to use for your DD is, OP. Do it, it's beautiful - as long as you don't mind that the traditional spelling you want really won't be easy for English people to get their heads around, though they won't mangle the pronunciation too much.

I'm English, resident in Ireland for a long time so comfortable with Irish names, but I do have to make a real effort not to pronounce them in an English way - and it's hard! Saying 'Orrrla' for Orla when your natural accent would make it come out as 'Awler' is a challenge

@sonjadog that’s my DHs name. Nobody can say it. He gets called cat- hal. Often Carl. He works with lots of different people so it’s not a case of learning it or getting used to it, he meets new people every day. So he spends time being called Carl, Charles, Carlos or my personal favourite Catherine. If you have a job where you meet a lot of new people it’s so irritating. But very few English people can say his name properly and that Includes our friends. We use the southern Irish pronunciation of the name, maybe the Donegal version would be easier.

Do it. Re school, I’ve asked multiple students how to pronounce their names this week. I’ve got 3 Mayas, 2 pronounce May-ah, 1 pronounces it My-ah. Obviously there are plenty of non-English typical names. Name your child what you want.

I’m Irish in London and have an unusual name that is ironically not Irish. I’ve spent my whole life being misgendered, spelling it out, it being mispronounced. I don’t mind at all. I don’t like my name but it’s who I am and also Having to regular spell my name is just part of who I am too, I’ve never known like with a more normal name. Ie would never consider changing it. I’ve never had anyone say to me “I’m just going to call you Jen”, I’d put a stop to that fairly swiftly if it did happen.
On a separate note, Irish name or no Irish name, I’ve never experienced any anti Irish sentiment in the 15 years I have lived in London.
Aside from the odd “To be sure, to be sure” which is at worst mildly irritating.

Sorry, some random sentence in the middle of that message above

The names are lovely but the spellings dont represent the sounds, i.e. Caoimhe is lovely but really its no good getting annoyed if people get it wrong as it doesnt sound anything like Keeva

@isadoradancing123 but the spellings do represent the sounds! Caoimhe is a name from another language, the Irish language. Phonetically in Irish it makes perfect sense. You can't expect the sounds to be the same as in the English language.

There's some amount of naice middle class people who wouldn't dream of making a fuss about pronouncing Yoruba or Gujarati names who make a meal of Irish names

My DS has an Irish name and it's been fine. Yes we need to spell it, but we have to spell our own names too - they are not unheard of but we both have the less common spelling

I've an Irish name, definitely had to pronounce it for people & spell it a lot for people in England but once you do it once, it's grand! In fact, when I lived abroad, people were very accepting of it too.
I've taught kids in England & elsewhere with Irish names, including several with non Irish background & they had no issues in school.
Wouldn't be an issue at all, your children will grow up in a multi cultural place & once people have heard a name once or twice they are fine with it!
I use my middle name in Starbucks everywhere though including in Ireland, just easier😂😂