Children mustn't see grandparents until vaccine found?

[Witterywoman]

Now that the kids are back at school, SIL has said her kids must isolate from both sets of grandparents in case they give them Covid picked up at school, and this must continue until a vaccine is found. All 4 grandparents are over 70 but healthy, no health conditions to speak of. My parents are particularly upset and don't understand it. I don't get it either and don't intend to stop them seeing my kids.

Are we missing something?

@Porcupineinwaiting

I need to live the years I have left not just exist

But that's where the calculations get interesting isnt it? If you have potentially 10 more years to live, is it worth limiting your activities for one of them so you can enjoy the other 9?

Or so others can.

@TheKeatingFive and that's make the calculation interesting - no one knows when it will be "safe" to come out again (vaccination is only one aspect of this, there are already huge advances in treatment and then there's good old herd immunity) and no one knows how long they've got left to live .

My mum is 76. It is already safer for her to catch COVID now than it was 6 months ago thanks to medical advances.

@PerveenMistry quite.

My mum is 76. It is already safer for her to catch COVID now than it was 6 months ago thanks to medical advances.

Sure. And shouldn’t she get the final say on what risk she’s willing to take?

She gets to decide what she can do. She doesn't get to decide what I or my children do.

SIL Is probably loving this!!

No we can’t see you until there is a vaccine!! Could be six months to a year away.

Talk to your brother and tell him how upset his mum and dad are, and that they are happy to take there chances of getting the virus, because seeing there grandchildren is very important to there mental health.

Or so others can.

We’re talking about grandparents here. They are facing higher risks than their grandchildren. Surely if they are ok with those risks, that’s their decision to make.

She doesn't get to decide what I or my children do.

Obviously not, but caring children tend to take their parents wishes into consideration.

Yes, and that's how they go merrily around spreading the deadly disease to others.

At the moment though, they are more likely to die from the flu than Covid (similar transmission way).
Have we ever stopped people from hugging or seeing their dgc because they could die from the flu??

@TheKeatingFive

Or so others can.

We’re talking about grandparents here. They are facing higher risks than their grandchildren. Surely if they are ok with those risks, that’s their decision to make.

And if they catch it from a school child and go on to spread the disease to others ? That's their free choice, too?

How do you feel about drunken drivers? Their choice to determine the acceptable level of risk?

How would you feel if your "rich experience" of life causes someone else to die?
Except that’s not RL @PerveenMistry.
Because dgc are EXTREMELY unlikely to die from Covid (regardless of how they caught it). So grand parents hugging their dgc isn’t putting the dgc at risk.

Th grand parents are more at risk from dying if they catch Covid from their (very likely) asymptomatic dgc. Surely that’s their decision to take the risk. Just like they could take the risk of going paragliding or smoking (or not eating their 5 a day, which few people d)

"And if they catch it from a school child and go on to spread the disease to others ? That's their free choice, too?"

Why are you assuming they'll spread the disease to others? They are adults. They know to socially distance, wear masks, isolate if they feel unwell, just like everyone else.

Making other peoples' lives an isolated misery so that you can pat yourself on the back and tell yourself that it's not your fault if someone gets Covid does not make you a better person.

@PerveenMistry, your last comment is irrelevant because ANYONE can be an asymptomatic carrier.

The only way you can ensure you will not give Covid to anyone is to have everyone self isolating. I’m not sure how we will eat etc if no one runs the stores/transport food/produces food etc...
But it’s still the way too be sure that no one transmit the disease.

Are you fully self isolating yourself?

@QuestionMarkNow

Yes, and that's how they go merrily around spreading the deadly disease to others.

At the moment though, they are more likely to die from the flu than Covid (similar transmission way).
Have we ever stopped people from hugging or seeing their dgc because they could die from the flu??

Actual scientific analysis shows COVID to be 50 to 100 times deadlier than influenza. But keep on denying.

www.google.com/amp/s/api.nationalgeographic.com/distribution/public/amp/science/2020/07/coronavirus-deadlier-than-many-believed-infection-fatality-rate-cvd

I think this must depend on the relationship grandparents have with their grandchildren. My parents dote on my three. They aren't required for childcare but see them almost every day.
I took all three of them round today because my mom and dad wanted to find out how their first week back at school/preschool went.
The older two had a long chat then played cricket in the garden with grandad, my three year old took nanny a picture he'd made her then fell asleep on her lap having a cuddle.
We all adhered to the original lockdown but they've said it'll be a cold day in hell before they're separated from them again. It made them utterly miserable and they said they'll live, not exist thank you very much.
They're late 60s, off on holiday next week, my dad is back at work, my mom shops every day and meets friends.
It honestly bemuses me when I hear about these kinds of decisions. We were supposed to flatten the curve, not leave older people living in fear and isolation for an indefinite period. Wash your hands, keep a distance if you want to, but to deprive people of the joy of their grandchildren in their later years...that feels inhumane to me

[quote JulieHere]@PerveenMistry

American?[/quote]
Why just assume that?

[quote QuestionMarkNow]@PerveenMistry, your last comment is irrelevant because ANYONE can be an asymptomatic carrier.

The only way you can ensure you will not give Covid to anyone is to have everyone self isolating. I’m not sure how we will eat etc if no one runs the stores/transport food/produces food etc...
But it’s still the way too be sure that no one transmit the disease.

Are you fully self isolating yourself?[/quote]
I am.

99% of people are able to self-isolate because infrastructure is being run by other people, not all of them young and fit, too.

@amicissimma

"And if they catch it from a school child and go on to spread the disease to others ? That's their free choice, too?"

Why are you assuming they'll spread the disease to others? They are adults. They know to socially distance, wear masks, isolate if they feel unwell, just like everyone else.

Making other peoples' lives an isolated misery so that you can pat yourself on the back and tell yourself that it's not your fault if someone gets Covid does not make you a better person.

The person above who took three school kids to granny yesterday says her parents are still working and going on holiday next week. They could be asymptomatic and spreading it to dozens.

If only the risk takers got COVID, no one would care. Have at it. Unfortunately that's not how it's working out.

@Batshitbeautycosmeticsltd

99% of people are able to self-isolate because infrastructure is being run by other people, not all of them young and fit, too.

Right, and by limiting our demands on them to absolute necessity, and staying in ourselves, we make things safer for those who choose to provide essential services. Until a vaccine or therapy is identified.

We need food for survival. We don't need entertainment, pubs, cuddles with granny. Those are "wants." Set aside personal wants for the greater good. Apparently an outdated concept.

@TheKeatingFive yes, but I'm not going to risk my kids infecting her just because she says it's ok or just thinks it wont happen just because they look well on a given day. When I got sick one of the worst parts of the first weeks was worrying that I might have infected her and my dad.

I caught influenza 4 times in my life from people who are out walking around, it can be passed asymptomatically, too. Of course, people immediately ping back, 'There's a vaccine for flu!' a) it's not available to everyone in the world b) many cannot pay for it privately even if it's 'just' a tenner or so. One time when I got it I was young and fit but it made me require hospitalisation and I was weak and ill for 6 months. But we don't do lockdowns and such for influenza outbreaks. I even got swine flu back in 2009.

There are lots of nasty illnesses that can be passed asymptomatically, but for this one the entire world has to grind to a halt and when the wheel starts turning even a millimetre it's too much for some people.

It doesn’t make a difference really.

Unless the grand parents isolate at home and stay in the house currently?

COVID is picked up from anyway.

If only the risk takers got COVID, no one would care. Have at it. Unfortunately that's not how it's working out.

The only way to totally stop the spread is to stay in lockdown for ever. Meanwhile, the economy slows to a stop. Families lose the ability to feed themselves and keep a roof over their heads, public services cannot be funded, including the NHS.

Do you think all these nhs consultants will work for free or something?

We don't need entertainment, pubs, cuddles with granny.

No, YOU, you don't need those things. YOU. Not 'we', don't presume to speak for everyone else. People have been making entertainment before they even drew pictures of themselves dancing on cave walls. They have lived in societies as long, too and are hard wired to seek out others to touch, mainly in the form of sex to reproduce.

And who pays for all this staying at home 'for the greater good', prey tell? For an undefined length of time and possibly forever because there may never be a reliable vaccine for this?