AIBU to be suspicious

[dderrick]

We took our 1 year old to a marine lake, and there's a small paddling pool next to it. We took her socks off & she was paddling in the water. There were 2 small boys running around naked. As I was holding my daughter I noticed an old guy, in his 70s arrive alone & sat down. His head must have been on a swivel, as he was following the boys movement intently. My wife was about to get our daughter undressed, but I picked her up & turned away. I whispered about the guy to her.
At that point he got up & as he walked away, he stopped as if to talk to another couple, but they just blanked him.
My wife says he was probably just a harmless old chap, and they don't always think what they're doing.
I suspect he was watching children deliberately. AIBU to suspect this given his behaviour? I was going to go over & ask "Are you here with anyone?", Would that be the best way to handle it? It's all a bit new to us.

Your rude OP. If it was me sat their watching (30 something slightly overweight female) I'm sure I would not be classed as a pedo. But my loving 88 year old grandfather who gets so much joy from watching his grandkids play, would? Why isit ok for your kid to be running around naked? I dont really want to see naked kids when I go to a splash park. Those people who ignored him are fucking rude. Like hesshit on their shoe. Dicks.

@WrongKindOfFace In the OP it states My wife was about to get our daughter undressed, but I picked her up & turned away. I whispered about the guy to her.

My point is not to be so fucking stupid as to get your children undressed in public.

[quote RiverMeadow]**@WrongKindOfFace* In the OP it states My wife was about to get our daughter undressed, but I picked her up & turned away. I whispered about the guy to her.*

My point is not to be so fucking stupid as to get your children undressed in public.[/quote]
I wouldn’t either, but their child wasn’t undressed at the time.

@Patbutcherismyhero

"Gender has nothing to do with it. If the guy was a pedo, you think we shouldnt upset him by stopping his fun ? The lunatics have take over the asylum."

The only lunatic here is you. I sympathised with you a bit to begin with. The whole overprotective, new dad thing. But you're coming across very patronising, rude and ignorant now. What fun was the old man having other than sitting in public place watching kids play? Imagine if that was your dad or grandad. Just stop with the shitty stereotypical judgements. It's everything to do with gender and age. Would you have felt the same if it had been a woman?

And the post you declared weird - I think the poster was basically saying than anyone you pass at any time in the street could be a paedophile 'watching' your children. What are you realistically going to do about it? Unless they are very obviously perving over your kids, approaching them or doing something perverted there is literally no way of telling what their motives are. Get a grip.

Having re-read 5 pages, I believe the rudeness was directed towards me first, I just replied in kind. I was expecting some constructive advice, and have been met with mostly hostility. If people don't like rudeness, don't dish it out.

Constructive advice...

Over 90% of child sexual abuse is carried out by someone the child knows, rather than a stranger. People often focus on teaching their kids "stranger danger", and don't really think about helping their child develop boundaries with adults that they know. Some resources that you might find interesting (I know your daughter is only 1 atm, but for future reference):

www.nspcc.org.uk/keeping-children-safe/support-for-parents/pants-underwear-rule/

childmind.org/article/10-ways-to-teach-your-child-the-skills-to-prevent-sexual-abuse/

There are ways you can protect your child OP, but interrogating an old man whose sat in a public place isn't the way to go.

@dderrick Fair point but calling people lunatics because they disagree with you is a bit far isn't it? I think you've been met with hostility because many people object to these sorts of stereotypical judgements. It hurts my heart to think of an elderly man being judged, ignored and stared at until he felt uncomfortable. It's just not nice and it's completely uncalled for.

Please don't pass these views and judgements onto your children.

@dderrick you called people who disagreed with you lunatics.

That’s rude.

You are right, I did call someone a lunatic. But I'd hardly call their comment "disagreement". The comment was if the man WAS (not suspected but confirmed) pedo, there was no harm in letting him watch naked children, as long as he didnt whip out his --- well you know what.
Thats far from sensible advice, wouldnt you agree ? Am I alone in thinking that was unacceptable ?

@dderrick

You are right, I did call someone a lunatic. But I'd hardly call their comment "disagreement". The comment was if the man WAS (not suspected but confirmed) pedo, there was no harm in letting him watch naked children, as long as he didnt whip out his --- well you know what. Thats far from sensible advice, wouldnt you agree ? Am I alone in thinking that was unacceptable ?

Yes I said that

Because at the end of the day, if he was, how would you have known? You couldn’t.

He wasn’t doing anything. He was sat there...watching.

That was it.

And I never said there was no harm in it, I said you couldn’t really do anything as he wasnt doing anything

I have read the whole thread through and I am astonished. If this had happened where I live someone would have pulled out a cellphone and called the police -- on the boys' parents!! Where were they while the kids were running around a public area naked?
I am old and old-fashioned but I agree with OP. I would be concerned about a random man, in the park alone, intently watching naked children running around unsupervised. I might not say anything to him but I would be watching him. For those who say it is unfair to men to be always suspected -- In the words of President Trump "That's the way it is."

I am old and old-fashioned but I agree with OP. I would be concerned about a random man, in the park alone, intently watching naked children running around unsupervised.

Where does it say they were unsupervised?

@GeorgiaGirl52 you're not old fashioned, you're judgemental.

@GeorgiaGirl52

As if you've quoted Trump on a thread about potential sexual predators .

The absolute irony of quoting Donald Trump on a thread like this.

Jesus.

'Nothing in this world can take the place of persistence. Talent will not: nothing is more common than unsuccessful men with talent. Genius will not: unrewarded genius is almost a proverb. Education will not: the world is full of educated derelicts. Persistence and determination alone are omnipotent' - Coolidge

'It’s amazing what you can accomplish if you do not care who gets the credit' - Truman

'I hate war as only a soldier who has lived it can, only as one who has seen its brutality, its futility, its stupidity' - Eisenhower

'Change will not come if we wait for some other person, or if we wait for some other time. We are the ones we’ve been waiting for. We are the change that we seek' - Obama

'That's the way it is' - Trump (via Phil Collins)

Brilliant. Right up there with 'Grab 'em by the pussy'.

@Soubriquet

And I never said there was no harm in it, I said you couldn’t really do anything as he wasnt doing anything

You said "Even if he was a dodgy man...honestly what harm was he doing?" Is that not the same as "There was no harm in it"? It sounds the same to me.