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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

This is weird right? What possible explanation could there be?

128 replies

Woofbloodywoof · 30/08/2020 21:06

Earlier today I noticed a missed FaceTime call. Because it had an email address instead of a phone number, I recognised the name and realised it was from the ex girlfriend of my ex boyfriend from years and years ago (15 years! Not in touch with him because he is a bit nuts). I never knew or met her and they had long ago split when I briefly dated my ex. I have no idea how she got my contact details. I don’t want to call her back because that would just be too weird but has anybody had this and/or got any idea why she would be contacting me?
(My DH said it must have been a pocket call but I don’t know why she would have my details.)
Obviously this is not quite a case for Jessica Fletcher but still it’s weirding me out a bit.

OP posts:
Cheeeeislifenow · 30/08/2020 21:37

Can you not just send her a message and ask if she was trying to contact you?

Original poster
Woofbloodywoof · 30/08/2020 21:37

@Backtoschoolnotsoonenough seeing as one of our dates was him taking me to a kebab ‘restaurant’ (such things do exist and yes they are as underwhelming as you might imagine) and I ended up paying for it, unless he won the lottery in the interim I think that’s unlikely.
But hey. You never know . 😂

OP posts:
Eckhart · 30/08/2020 21:38

It could be anything from a pocket call to her thinking you've murdered him. How can there be on-going drama from a quick email to her asking why she contacted you? You can block her after you've found out what it's all about, if you want.

BF2748 · 30/08/2020 21:38

I probably would’ve rang her back just out of curiosity 🙈 I don’t think I’d handle the suspense of not knowing Grin

Babyroobs · 30/08/2020 21:39

My first thought would be that maybe something had happened to him and she was trying to contact you to inform you. Hopefully not the case, but I would try calling back.

julybaby32 · 30/08/2020 21:40

Possibly a death? mostly we have received letters for this sort of thing, (older generation sadly it has happened quite a bit recently) but if she doesn't have your address?

Butterer · 30/08/2020 21:41

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

CoronaBollox · 30/08/2020 21:42

Something has either happened to him, he's done something terrible to her or she has an STD from him so is informing all his exs. Or they're both a bit crazy.

ChicCroissant · 30/08/2020 21:45

You went out with a man for two months 15 years ago and an ex of his has tried to FaceTime you? I'm surprised you even know her name, how strange!

Branleuse · 30/08/2020 21:47

Can you email and ask if everything is ok

Original poster
Woofbloodywoof · 30/08/2020 21:49

If she FaceTimes me again - remember, she FaceTimed me rather than calling or texting which is super odd no? - I will answer or call back if I miss it. Because then it must be something right? If it isn’t anything other than her cyber stalking me and accidentally FaceTiming me then I think it would just be too embarrassing. (And she probably would answer either, I think.) I still cannot for the life of me fathom how she has my details because I’m not a big FB user and certainly don’t have my personal details out there.
If there are any developments I will be sure to let you know.
Death unlikely though because I just found ex bf on Twitter and he was merrily tweeting about football yesterday.

OP posts:
DaphneFanshaw · 30/08/2020 21:49

I would message to see what she wanted.

emma6776 · 30/08/2020 21:50

@ellaandthebella - definitely - I used it to keep in touch with friends and family when I was deployed overseas and that was many years ago! In my 40’s and out of the forces 13 years ago now.

SunshineCake · 30/08/2020 21:54

I need to know too!

mnahmnah · 30/08/2020 21:54

I would message back, feigning ignorance of who she is, like any other missed call. Just saying ‘I had a missed call from this number, just wondering what it was regarding?’

PlanDeRaccordement · 30/08/2020 21:55

If someone had died and you wanted to inform people you wouldn't facetime them though. Would be a call or a text.

You’d text a death message before FaceTiming it? That’s cold hearted.

wineandcheeseplease · 30/08/2020 21:56

I'd message asking if she meant to call

PlanDeRaccordement · 30/08/2020 21:56

remember, she FaceTimed me rather than calling or texting which is super odd no?

It’s not odd if all she has is your email..... you’re assuming she has your phone number which she probably does not.

HollowTalk · 30/08/2020 21:57

If he tried that restaurant trick with someone last night, he might have been impaled on that kebab stick and this woman might want to know if you fancy a slice.

DopamineHits · 30/08/2020 21:58

If she or he mean anything to you, answer if she calls again. If not, block her.

And if anything strange starts happening in your life, you may have a "revenge is best served cold" kind of stalker who accidentally butt dialed you. It does happen.

Myotherusernamewastakenagain · 30/08/2020 21:59

Does she work in the same industry as you?

MitziK · 30/08/2020 21:59

@PlanDeRaccordement

If someone had died and you wanted to inform people you wouldn't facetime them though. Would be a call or a text.

You’d text a death message before FaceTiming it? That’s cold hearted.

I got told about my brother by FB messenger. Not 'he's been in an accident and is very unwell/can I call you?', just 'he's in hospital, no point bothering going'.

People can be like that.

PlanDeRaccordement · 30/08/2020 22:03

So sorry @MitziK about your brother. I think that FB message was a terrible way to find out. People can be so insensitive.

DinoDeb · 30/08/2020 22:04

Have to be honest, I think he’s dead.

I can’t think of any other reason why she would contact you.

I wouldn’t call but I would message back, I couldn’t stand the suspense.

D4rwin · 30/08/2020 22:05

She might have a toddler who was messing with her phone?