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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To think going on holiday at the moment is selfish and unnecessary

649 replies

OverTheRainbow88 · 30/08/2020 07:59

I think it’s totally unnecessary and selfish for people to go abroad on holiday at the moment. I’m not talking about people that need to go abroad for other reasons, such as ,work or to see ill relatives etc. I think getting our children back to school trumps a holiday.
However, lots of family and friends are going away abroad for holidays, do others agree with me or am I being unreasonable?

OP posts:
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nosswith · 30/08/2020 08:23

I don't think it is. Just be prepared for the possibility of quarantine upon your return, so too late now if you have school age children.

As others have said, probably safer in many places than in the UK. Sadly often cheaper as well.

Whilst not the intent or even thought of the OP, what about those who have elderly relatives living abroad?

Timeforamamechange · 30/08/2020 08:23

We’re heading off for some sunshine in December. No concerns. 😁

icedaisy · 30/08/2020 08:24

Well, having watched recent local events play out I have to agree.

Lady goes to turkey and comes home and goes to work in supermarket. Then pops to pub and for a sandwich. Tests positive two days later and now we are up to 13 cases within a couple of days.

Facebook has turned into a war zone with her and her family being lynched for "starting,causing" a local outbreak. Her family are on screaming that she needed a holiday, was entitled to one.

She broke no rules and there was no quarantine but I'm sure she may be feeling rather uncomfortable right now.

This is a rural type community and everyone knows everyone so it is unlikely to have the same result if this happened in a city.

latticechaos · 30/08/2020 08:24

@fairynick

There are so many countries whose rate is lower, far lower in fact, than ours. If anything we are the threat to countries like Turkey, islands in Greece, the Balearics etc. Your post seems only bothered about our country and our schools. We are probably minimising our risk more and better off going on holiday and spending two weeks there than in Manchester. If it’s unfair on anyone it’s the countries that we’re going to, not ours.
This is incorrect, as travelling from a higher risk area increases your own risk compared to staying home.
RoseAndRose · 30/08/2020 08:24

From a climate change pov, going abroad for a holiday is wrong anyhow.

This is a great chance to re-set habits and reduce damage

icedaisy · 30/08/2020 08:26

I should add that I am an anxious over thinking people pleaser and I am not sure I could cope mentally if my holiday caused a local spike. So I'm best to not bother and stay at home.

pjmask · 30/08/2020 08:26

No they haven’t, but it increases the risk, one major reason we have had so many more deaths is because we didn’t close our airports as fast as other countries

Stop making shit up

ChangeThePassword · 30/08/2020 08:26

The level of community transmission affects schools, and the amount of travel, socialising, commuting etc all affect levels of community transmission

I don't commute. I rarely socialise. I walk or travel by bike. I live alone. I'm very careful about masks etc and would follow government guidelines about quarantine.

I just can't see how me going on holiday would have an effect on schools.

middleager · 30/08/2020 08:27

Is that worse than us going around the U.K. ??

I wonder this too. I've been on a UK holiday to a rammed seaside resort witb people from all over the country, including high risk areas. I wondered why that wasn't deemed as 'risky' as going overseas to an area with low rates.

Parker231 · 30/08/2020 08:27

@RoseAndRose - all of DH and my families live abroad so we will , subject to Covid restrictions, continue to travel to see them regularly.

marsiettina · 30/08/2020 08:28

Why only abroad? People are going on holiday all over the U.K. and potentially spreading Covid to other regions.
If you believe that people should not go on holiday, then it should apply to staycations as well. Everyone stays in their local area bubble in order to not infect other areas.

SummerPoppies · 30/08/2020 08:28

I returned from a holiday abroad last week. No quarantine required.
I'm going abroad again next month after bagging a bargain.
I can't work up the energy to be bothered about what an internet random thinks about it.

milveycrohn · 30/08/2020 08:28

Many people who are currently away in August, will have had their holidays booked months ago, pre covid.
They can cancel, and lose their money, or go, and take the risk of quarantine at short notice.
Currently, in the UK, the police have been blocking the roads into Cornwall, etc as it is 'full'.
Some countries have a lower infection rate than the UK

lovelyupnorth · 30/08/2020 08:29

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CitizenCandyKane · 30/08/2020 08:29

People are allowed to go on holiday to certain places. It's none of your business if they exercise that choice and go. And it's not for you to make it into a moral issue either.

RandomTree · 30/08/2020 08:30

I agree OP. I know it's not forbidden and of course everyone needs to make their own decision, but I do think it's unnecessary and somewhat selfish. Especially the people (yes I know some too) who come back from Spain and don't quarantine.

Aragog · 30/08/2020 08:30

I went on holiday abroad for a fortnight this summer. Quarantine wasn't in lance so I didn't.

Whilst away we were SDing and wearing masks, following hand washing guidelines, spent almost all our time outside even for food, etc. We went by train and we were never sat within 2m if anyone else. When we are out we were never within 2m.

On return we have followed SDing rules and not been out and about a huge amount anyway. It's more than

My trip to France didn't put anyone else at more risk than if I'd had a few meal and drinks out in England.

I've been back for four weeks now and haven't had any form of symptoms, so no one's life was endangered due to me going away.

We needed some time out. We've had four very close family deaths in the past year, 3 during lock down including dh's dad. We've both worked full time throughout, albeit from home mainly. Had we stayed home we'd have worked and not had a complete break.

English holidays were no cheaper and I can't see how it would have lessened the risks any either. We'd also seen the photographs and videos of overcrowded English resorts and decided it wasn't for us. We'd rather go sonewhere quieter and less crowded personally.

The personal benefits of us having a few days completely away from home bad work have been massive. It gave us some much needed time as a family unit and to reflect on what has happened regarding our family much more. We all came back much more refreshed.

You can think what you like but if the guidelines say it's fine to go abroad then I was not wrong to do so.

Unless you also think it's selfish to have day trips, go to a restaurant, visit a local attraction, etc ???

Next week I will be back in front of hundreds of children in unventilated crowded rooms. Not one of them will be at risk from my holiday a month ago.

Darkdecent · 30/08/2020 08:30

No I don't think it's selfish, I'm an adult and can make my own mind up about where and when I holiday. This virus is shit but we all need to get on with our lives and get back to some sort of normality. We also need to get the economy kick started.

If you're prepared to go into quarantine on your return then I'd say go abroad, life's short and this virus has taken enough away from us all. I speak as someone who has just returned from Spain and spent two weeks in quarantine and I missed two weeks pay. Eh ho.

latticechaos · 30/08/2020 08:32

@ChangeThePassword

The level of community transmission affects schools, and the amount of travel, socialising, commuting etc all affect levels of community transmission

I don't commute. I rarely socialise. I walk or travel by bike. I live alone. I'm very careful about masks etc and would follow government guidelines about quarantine.

I just can't see how me going on holiday would have an effect on schools.

It does, whether you can see it or not.

My activities do too.

I'm not picking on you. It is just a fact.

The more we do collectively, the more transmission.

RoseAndRose · 30/08/2020 08:32

@Parker231 then my comment - about holidays abroad - did not apply to you in the first place

Pluckedpencil · 30/08/2020 08:33

Why on earth do people thinking me going to a supermarket in Italy is worse than me going to a supermarket in the UK? Or a plane is worse than a bus? It's the same. By the way, the whole way through summer since June, Italy has left its borders with the EU wide open (other than Spain/Greece/Malta now where you need a sierological test on return), their case rate is lower and deaths are lower than the uk me the rest of Europe, despite this. How do you explain that if the problem is the borders? The real problem is the uk are talking a whole lot, and doing fuck all to stop the spread, except the usual xenophobic tosh. See also: school opening. I have people here wringing their hands about people going to stay a week in an isolated villa in France, and meanwhile they are getting on buses and going to pubs.

Aragog · 30/08/2020 08:33

. I think getting our children back to school trumps a holiday.

An incompetent government and education minister will have a much bigger impact on how the return to school than weather Fred and Jane down the road went to Greece on their holiday.

Darkdecent · 30/08/2020 08:34

In Spain I was in a private apartment, I wore a mask at all times, didn't mix with anyone else and the aeroplane was half empty. Now I'm home and back at work I'm mixing with a lot more people, I see the local pub full with no social distancing, friends on Facebook getting together, arms round each other for photos and I was the supposed threat!

Pluckedpencil · 30/08/2020 08:35

I agree, the more we do, the more transmission. But just because Boris wants me to go to Starbucks in central London but not a nice outdoor café in the south of France doesn't mean I'm going to listen.

latticechaos · 30/08/2020 08:36

@CitizenCandyKane

People are allowed to go on holiday to certain places. It's none of your business if they exercise that choice and go. And it's not for you to make it into a moral issue either.
I agree it is not a moral issue.

The facts are that travelling increases community transmission, but it is legal.