To quit breastfeeding now?

[hipsalips]

I have a three month old and have been EBF, and while a lot of the time its nice to breastfeed I am getting a bit worn down from it.

I'm debating stopping but feel very conflicted. On one hand I like it (sometimes), I know its good for my DD.

On the other hand I hate the clothes I need to wear, I find all the nursing clothes well dowdy, and would feel more like me if I stopped.

I'm planning to wean her at 6 months, would it be worth swapping to formula until then or would you stick with it, or combination feed to get the best of both worlds?

@Temp123999 don’t make me laugh. You come on here and spout judgement about other women’s feeding choices, telling women who choose/have to use formula that they’re feeding their babies junk/fast food and I’m the one with the problem? Are you for real? Get your pious bullshit out of other women’s lives.

I hope this thread doesn’t end up being deleted for the OP’s sake.

Temp123999, McDonald's do lovely salads and smoothies too, you know.....

@Temp123999 everything was so respectful and informative and you had to come along with a crass anti FF comment that’s not only incorrect but just plain nasty, why? Why did you have to do that and turn the thread into something it wasn’t when OP is clearly in need of the thread staying up and not being banned.

Grow up and stop judging.

• waves

I chose to FF because it was the best option for me and my baby for a number of reasons. I am completely secure in my decision and so your nasty vitriol doesn’t affect me. Also, you clearly can’t cook as no one would waste lobster in a ‘stir-fry*
Stir fry the veg then grill the lobster and for DH and kids I make Macaroni cheese.
I’m telling you to fuck off on behalf of all the women who struggled with feeding, feel sad they didn’t or could BF, who had poorly babies who needed FF while in NICU, or who were so poorly themselves they couldn’t. For all the women who beat themselves up because their initial plans for feeding didn’t pan out.
I had two babies in NICU and DD was incredibly unwell and was inpatient at GOSH plus under the care of 3 consultants in 3 different NHS hospitals in London and they all agreed that breastfeeding was the best thing for, it wasn't easy but it was the right thing to do.
Instead of insulting me look at the way you talk to another woman.

@Ethelfleda you’re quite right. I’m sorry. @ I’ll stop now but by Christ it pisses me off when people pour bile about FF. I chose to do it and I’m ok with that but lots of women did want to BF and couldn’t and they’re the ones who are damaged by the bollocks from people like @Temp123999

FWIW, I really believed in breastfeeding. I was gutted when it ended due to thrush just before he was 2. It took me a while to get over that.

But that’s ME. That was MY personal choice. There are so many nuances to feeding that it isn’t always a clear cut choice.

IMO - substance for substance, breast milk is better* than formula milk.
But breastfeeding isn’t necessarily better* than formula feeding. The latter statement being based very much on circumstance.

*the word ‘better’ is even hard to define

@Temp123999 I’m not going to be nice to you just because you’re a woman. That would be condescending. Stop telling women who can’t breastfeed they’re feeding their babies junk. Just. Stop.

[quote Histrionicz]**@Ethelfleda* you’re quite right. I’m sorry. @ I’ll stop now but by Christ it pisses me off when people pour bile about FF. I chose to do it and I’m ok with that but lots of women did want to BF and couldn’t and they’re the ones who are damaged by the bollocks from people like @Temp123999*[/quote]

@SideEyeing don’t stop til she’s finished the terrible twos...#maybenotajoke

@Temp123999 P.S. lobster is too delicate a flavour to be lumped on top of a stir fry. It would be overwhelmed. Crayfish would be better and cheaper.

We struggled with breastfeeding (tongue tie, weight loss, engored etc). It got easier at week 11 and I EBF for 16 months. 18m is now FF as doesn’t get on well with cows milk.

I found BF easier once established. I also expressed each day as DH stayed up with poor sleeper.

I found BF a real struggle when due on my period, cannot explain it but I really hated it for a few days but was ok afterwards. So your issues could be hormonal.

Personally I think fed is best. A miserable BF mum isn’t much good to a baby.

Re weight loss - I only started losing once I stopped BF. It’s falling of with no effort even though I tried diet/exercise while BF.

Stop de-railing being a GF @Temp123999 and allow OP to get the advice she needs.

If I were you (and what I have done with some of my kids) I’d start to add a daily bottle of formula now and slowly switch that way. You gently wean off the breast, avoid big hormone fluctuations for you and should be full finished by 6 months assuming you want to be.

Honestly, combi feeding is so underrated. My DD is 4 months and EBF because of a Cows Milk Protein Allergy, I long for being able to give a bottle of formula like I did with her brothers.

@Temp123999 just out of interest, would you tell my friend who had a preventative double mastectomy that she’s feeding her babies junk? Or would you advise her that she simply shouldn’t have had kids if she was unable to breastfeed?

We’re hijacking this thread as you’re pissing me off and I can’t let it go. But I’m going to now out of respect for @hipsalips. I’m sorry to have derailed. I think I’ve probably made my feelings quite clear.

steps away for a breather

Laughing at the silly analogy. Lobster stir fry vs. McDonald’s? And where in the hierarchy would macaroni cheese rank?

I mean I found BF easier than FF, I now get up in the night to make a bottle instead of baby helping themselves.
Plus now I have another thing to carry when out, DC is weaned but still loves milk 3/4 day/night 🙄

@Temp123999

Having searched you, it seems that your favourite pastimes are to troll and make yourself look superior, when it actually fact you just come across as someone who makes me wince.

Hopefully MN removes you swiftly.

@DolphinsAndNemesis

Laughing at the silly analogy. Lobster stir fry vs. McDonald’s? And where in the hierarchy would macaroni cheese rank?

Hmmm, good question.....depends which kind of milk was used to make the cheese.

I found mix feeding great. It doesn’t have to be either/or once supply is established.

Sigh. Yeah, "breast is best." But breast isn't bestier than a mother with sepsis from mastitis, a starved baby from inadequate supply, a mother who is utterly miserable because for whatever reason she doesn't feel comfortable feeding her baby when he/she wants food and she has to unhook a bra in public, a mother who has flashbacks feeding her baby because of ptsd from something in her past or simply a mother who loves her baby more than anything but knows bf isn't right for HER. There are countless more examples and this list isn't exhaustive, @Temp123999.

I exclusively bf until 8m. It was hard. I had terrible PND (still do), got sepsis from mastitis 12 days pp, bad latch, thrush. Honestly, yes, I am proud of how far I (we) have come.. But if I were to do it again I'd mixed feed from much earlier. Because the guilt I now feel is how many times I swore and cried when DD was hungry AGAIN, or instead of cuddling her close I stared straight ahead willing it to be over.. How many times I yelled at my husband and cried. How many times I googled "I hate my baby" because I couldn't bear it and how many times I genuinely thought my DD would be better off without me. I "succeeded" at bf - I'm a good tick box for the bf advisors who saw me pre birth, and yes I do love it now (ish.. It's easy). But it cost me dearly and I truly don't believe my DD was "better off" than if DH had given her a bottle or two a day and I'd been less physically and mentally sick.

Aside from my little sob story, my best friend FF from birth because it was her choice and she is everything I aspire to ad a mum. She's wonderful and her kids are fantastic. It's not an issue to preach about. It's personal.

@SideEyeing

Sigh. Yeah, "breast is best." But breast isn't bestier than a mother with sepsis from mastitis, a starved baby from inadequate supply, a mother who is utterly miserable because for whatever reason she doesn't feel comfortable feeding her baby when he/she wants food and she has to unhook a bra in public, a mother who has flashbacks feeding her baby because of ptsd from something in her past or simply a mother who loves her baby more than anything but knows bf isn't right for HER. There are countless more examples and this list isn't exhaustive, *@Temp123999*.

I exclusively bf until 8m. It was hard. I had terrible PND (still do), got sepsis from mastitis 12 days pp, bad latch, thrush. Honestly, yes, I am proud of how far I (we) have come.. But if I were to do it again I'd mixed feed from much earlier. Because the guilt I now feel is how many times I swore and cried when DD was hungry AGAIN, or instead of cuddling her close I stared straight ahead willing it to be over.. How many times I yelled at my husband and cried. How many times I googled "I hate my baby" because I couldn't bear it and how many times I genuinely thought my DD would be better off without me. I "succeeded" at bf - I'm a good tick box for the bf advisors who saw me pre birth, and yes I do love it now (ish.. It's easy). But it cost me dearly and I truly don't believe my DD was "better off" than if DH had given her a bottle or two a day and I'd been less physically and mentally sick.

Aside from my little sob story, my best friend FF from birth because it was her choice and she is everything I aspire to ad a mum. She's wonderful and her kids are fantastic. It's not an issue to preach about. It's personal.

you sound like a great mum. With so much compassion and empathy for others who make different choices. That’s a great example to set for your little one.